My husband and I are thinking about renting a house, and sharing it with a close friend. We have a toddler, (a loud toddler), and are hoping to have another kid in the next year or so. I haven’t lived with anyone but my husband (and kid) in a long time, and it seems to me that there will be lots of different issues from what came up in college. A little more complicated, especially due to our being married, and having a small child, and maybe two.
The friend is very interested and willing. We’re not forcing him into bond servitude or anything. He’s in the process of getting divorced, could afford a small place of his own, but would prefer a house, and thinks living with us would probably be fine. He’s here about five days a week, for part of the day, anyway.
We’re in a one-bedroom apartment, which is kind of crowded. We’d like more space.
So far, besides a general, “Will we drive each other mad?”, the things I think we need to discuss are:
Whose name on the lease?: I’m thinking ours, probably, since there’s more of us, and it’s more likely he’ll move on first.
Rent split. There are three Lissars, and there might be four later on.
Utilities split-up: Separate phone lines? Probably a wireless network for internet. Half and half? Two thirds us? Three quarters us?
Food: if we do this, I anticipate cooking with him a lot, and probably eating together most of the time. So how do we balance who’s eating what and when? Seems potentially complicated.
Chores: Whiteboarded list, separate responsibilities, switching month by month?
Personal space: how do we stay out of each other’s way enough to permit ourselves slightly separate lives?
Has anyone done this, or something similar? Stories, anecdotes, things that went right or horribly wrong? What am I overlooking?
We are reasonable people (I hope), and none of us are naturally inclined to let things build up or to loud fighting. I’m looking for potential flaws, problems, areas of friction.