Dating Site Tips
Use photos of yourself from 10/20/30 years ago
Put your career as something aspirational such as Doctor/Lawyer/CEO
Have every single picture of yourself in front of an international landmark so it looks like you got money to travel
I don’t know how to clean it out once it forms, but I have found that simply rinsing water through from the back (that is, from the non-cutting side) of the razor keeps the gunk from forming to begin with (as long as you rinse immediately after you shave).
Because, you know, the gunk starts at the cutting edge. If you place the blade under running water cutting edge up, the water is just going to push the gunk into the tight space between the blades. But if you do it cutting edge down and hold it under a faucet (or shower-head, for us single men who can keep our shaving kit in the shower) then the gunk gets pushed out before it reaches the tight space between the blades.
So give that a try, maybe, if you don’t already? If that’s already what you do… have you considered you might have hard water?
That will certainly generate lots of responses. And a nearly equal number of failed first dates.
That pix of you lounging nonchalantly against your Lamborghini works great. Until you show up in a 2006 Corolla that needs a fender fixed and hasn’t been washed since Bush II was President.
Another tip: when you take that photo, make sure the Lamborghini’s owner isn’t nearby.
I live in greater Miami, the Land of Poseurs. We have outfits here that park Lamborghini’s in photogenic spots and charge $10/shot for you to lounge against it while they take pix of you stylin’ for the crowd.
I know a fellow who had a date with an online gal and they went on some sort of outdoor excursion where photos were taken. She never responded to him again after that date. The next time he saw her online profile, she had a new photo up, from their excursion, with his SUV next to her in the photo.
I learned here on the Dope a couple years ago of a phenomenon called “Dating for Dinner.”
Wherein a single woman will respond to a guy’s online dating profile intending simply to be taken out for a free meal after which she’ll ghost the guy. Apparently the ladies get together after and gloat about who got bought the best meal. With zero intent to seek friendship or romance or companionship; this is simply about finding a “coupon” good for a free meal and cashing it.
I’d imagine it occurs with all combinations of gender and sexual orientation, but the most common case is hetero F and M respectively.
I’ll be poking into those murky online dating waters myself here in a few months. That’ll be the first time in my life. It’ll be “interesting” to see how much scammery I encounter living as I do in Scam City.
I was getting some groceries yesterday and my total came to $13.37. I gave the cashier a twenty and he counted out seven dollars. Then he asked me if I wanted the change.
I was surprised. I’ve encountered stores where they ask if you want to donate the change to a charity but this cashier didn’t mention anything like that. He just seemed to think that there are people who don’t care about amounts smaller than a dollar.
I am not one of those people. I told him that yes, I did want my change. He handed it to me and made a comment “I guess it adds up.” I didn’t say anything but I was thinking “No, it doesn’t need to add up. It’s money right now. And you’re a cashier in a supermarket; you’re not in a position to be dismissive of small amounts of money.”
If I had been a little quicker, I might have suggested that if small amounts of change don’t matter, he should round my sixty-three cents up to a dollar and give me that.
So here’s the “brilliant” tip: When buying something, always take your change.
Or even younger:
Hopefully he did not, in fact, count out seven dollars and then also give you 63 cents in change. Otherwise, you just scammed him out of a buck.
You’re right it was six dollars.
minor hijack I had a friend who was once teased by a grocery store co-worker for using coupons when he shopped, saying things like “It’s only a dollar.” His response was, “Okay, then give me a dollar.” When his co-worker refused to do so, my friend would say, “But you don’t think a dollar is that important, so why not give it to me?” He used to say that the money he saved using coupons all the time financed his annual trips to Las Vegas.
Some men take women out to dinner? Hasn’t happen to me in almost 30 years!
Sorry to hear your recent marriage isn’t working out. It sounded pretty good at first, from here at least.
Watch out for the scammers. There’s lots of them out there. And if you want to weed them out quickly, start with a coffee date. Any match who tries to tell you that coffee isn’t a “date,” consider that a bullet dodged, and move on.
Dating for Dinner is nothing new of course. It could be the dating scam of the least unfavorable consequence.
“Dating for Kidneys”?
I was once at a McDonalds and the guy in front of me paid for his $3.99 meal with a $5 bill. The cashier gave him a dollar and a penny in change. The customer, who apparently wasn’t good with arithmetic, insisted he was owed another dollar. After several futile attempts to explain it to him, the cashier called his manager. The manager also attempt to explain it, but the guy was adamant and belligerent. Finally the manager just handed him an extra dollar.
So I guess the tip is, be obnoxious enough and it might pay off.
Strengthening your core is good for your health, but few of us enjoy going to the gym to lift weights, do squats, etc. Instead, just eat a lot more until you become morbidly obese. Carrying around all those extra pounds will give your muscles a great workout!
That reminds me of how the old Leisure Suit Larry game would make you answer a couple of trivia questions that presumably a kid wouldn’t be able to answer but most adults would know. That was in the pre-internet days; that probably wouldn’t work now since anyone could just Google the answers.