Three Weeks in Florida and I'm Still Not Tan!!!

Fucking work.

You will bless that work when you are in your 40s and 50s and have no wrinkles, sun spots or skin cancer because you didn’t get that tan. Use sunscreen! Always! 12 months a year, every day!

—This has been a public service announcement . . .

SOME people think pale is sexy. :cool:


Sua is a pasty, fishbellied white boy. Nanny, nanny boo boo.

Play that funky music, white boy.

Ooh, poor baby. Yeah, I sure am cryin’ for ya! 2 more months of the above for me.

If you want to tan, you’ve got to make time for it outside of your work schedule. Maybe if you get up really early, before the sun comes u…

Uh, never mind.

Cool! Tans are gross and creepy. Why would you want to look like toast?

Eeeww, tans. They turn your skin into shoeleather & tumors!!

Chicks dig scrawny pale guys. Trust me.

I live in Florida. I got tan. Really tan. I got skin cancers. Many skin cancers. I got surgery. Many surgeries. More than twenty surgeries. I got scars. Many scars. I got radiation treatments on my right ear. I got hair loss from radiation treatments. I got smart. (okay, it took a while) I wear long sleeve shirts, long pants and a hat when I go outside. I buy sunscreen in jobber lots. I WILL have more skin cancers and more surgeries. Don’t fucking tan yourself cause it ain’t fucking worth it.

And now I understand why!

Copied from AOL weather for Minneapolis, MN for Friday, Feb 2nd:

Speak to me not of warm, sunny weather.

Want me to come down there and slather you with some oil, baby?
Count me in as another anti-tanner. I wear moisturizor with sunscreen every day. I use Neutrogena self-tanner when I’m showing my legs. It’s just not worth it, and I don’t think orange people look that nice anyway.

But the offer still stands for the oil, sweetcheeks. :slight_smile:

Oh behalf of NACOOL ( North American Cadre Of Ommpah-Loompahs), I stand short yet firm in my denouncement of the narrowminded previous statement !! Remember our motto !! " We Orange fuckers, we wanna be treated just like everyone else". :eek:


The Preceeding announcement was paid for by the HyperMelatonics Of America. We're Orange As We Wanna Be. :D

Understand about skin cancer, but I’m quite sure the lung cancer and cirrhosis of the liver will get me first anyway.

Sara, right back atcha. 'Though I suggest Crisco :eek:

Work update - Might get 2 daylight hours off tomorrow. Of course, it’s going to be cloudy tomorrow. Sigh