You better – or one of these day’s, you will get arrested for being in possession of it! You might anyway, even with the sign.
Oh, here’s another thang that frosts me: News articles that indiscriminately use stanch and staunch interchangeably.
For some reason, I get really upset over elevator etiquette (or rather the lack thereof).
When I see people barge into an elevator as soon as the doors open without giving people time to get out, whether I’m in the elevator in question or not, it makes me want to yank them out of the elevator by the collar. You let people out before you go in that way, there’s plenty of room and nobody has to get in anyone’s way. It isn’t complicated.
Similarly, I despise people who are going to one of the building’s upper floors and decide to stand right in front of the doors so the people going to for lower floors have to ask them to move or push past. Why on earth do you feel the need to stand in everyone’s way? It isn’t like you don’t know people will need to get by you; you’re going to the top floor and the buttons are lit for several floors below yours.
Finally, there’s the tried and true people who take the elevator to go up or down one floor. I know my reaction to this is completely irrational. I really do. Anyone could have a problem taking the stairs (and I, having had intermittent knee problems since my teens, am a prime example) but it still drives me up the wall when people who aren’t obviously disabled in some way use the elevator for one-floor trips.
I never thought of that - I suppose I’ll just leave them alone in the future then. Crap. Hey, can I get deputized from the store to collect them or something? I’d totally do that!
There are people that do that, actually. Skulk around town, with an old beat-up pickup truck, collecting stray carts that have lost their way, and returning them. I suppose they get paid some kind of bounty for every cart they bring back.
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Speaking of little things that annoy, that.
And another tiny annoyance: People who begin a sentence with “And” even when there was nothing in particular preceding that to warrant beginning with “And”.
And how may I help you today?
“Going forward”, “orientate” and innumerable others I can’t recall at the moment. Ditto the limp-dick handshakes; females get these more often than males, I’m convinced. So skveevy. And yes, I offer a good firm grasp. C’mon, you’re not going to injure my hand. Co-workers who consistently (try to, hah!) push their work off on me but I guess everyone shares that one. Oooh, and the car passing me to dart in front to grab a small space and then SLOWS DOWN. Justifiable homicide, I say.
How 'bout those damp curved hand fingertip shakes, where you’re not sure for a moment if he’s going to shake your hand or kiss it like you’re Queen Elizabeth? Ick. Here’s a clue, guys: we don’t present our hand for kisses anymore. Haven’t in any of your lifetimes, unless you were on a stage wearing tights.
And the corollary…WOMEN, stop offering your hand with the back side up. Thumb up. It confuses the men, otherwise, and trains them all wrong.
(That being said, I have warm damp hands almost all the time, and I’m so sorry. They are just like that, despite the fact that I wash them at least 50 times a day. I can’t make a decent pie crust 'cause of it, and I dread handshakes. OTOH, my patients love my warm paws!)
boyhowdy, my office manager goes one worse: “Orientated”. shudder I know it’s not technically incorrect, but it makes me stabby.
Hone in vs. home in. Chomping at the bit vs. champing at the bit.
To be fair, most of the time it’s not a car alarm, that’s just the remote lock/unlock that comes built in with the car…and yeah, they could use the key, except I know of more than a few cars that don’t like it when you use the key instead of the remote lock/unlock…they let you do it a few times before locking you out, or alarming, or something…because only a thief would use the key, not the remote? 
I don’t understand it, but it’s sort of a necessity now…I just wish car makers would stop having it honk for remote lock/unlock…just flash the lights, that’s all that’s needed.
Oh - my car has a remote lock, and it doesn’t honk - like you say, the lights just flash. That’s why I thought if it was honking, it was an alarm. Well, in that case, the manufacturers can damned well knock it off with the honking to lock/unlock a car - it’s not necessary, and it’s quite annoying.
What about the opposite of the limp dick handshake? The vice grip, squeezing my knuckle bones ‘til they crack, excessively macho handshake of death. It’s almost always men who do this and they look you in the eye smugly. Ow! Whatta ya tryin’ to prove buddy? Are these the type of guys who get a power trip over kicking puppies?
“I have a pit in my stomach” - no, you have *a sick feeling in the pit of *your stomach.
“My cat really loves to be pet.” No, your cat loves to be petted. Perhaps she loves being your pet too, but I don’t think that was what you were trying to get across.
:mad:
Mine is people who believe stupid stuff- things that don’t affect me at all, but the very fact that they think this rubbish makes me furious. For example, a gardening forum I post on has a whole section on biodynamics and moon planting. I could just ignore it, and follow the other advice on there, which is usually quite good, but no. I have to read the woo. And it makes me angry.
Oh, I’ve got so-o-o-o-o many! The use of ‘and’ or ‘&’ in front of “etc.” The ‘and’ is included in “etc.,” so ‘and etc.’ and ‘& etc.’ are both wrong.
And then there’s the irritation of sometimes not being able to get ahold of a lone, thin piece of paper in order to turn the page, especially if it’s in the midst of an exciting story. I’m sure this is caused by my old, gnarly fingers with too-dry skin, but I refuse to lick my finger to turn a page. (I read a lot of library books and you never know how unsanitary they might be.)
Eating with plastic utensils or drinking out of a plastic cup. Everything justs tastes cheap.
Cigarette smokers. Not the smoking so much, but that ritual of pounding the pack with one hand into the palm of the other. It’s always in triplets.
Bap-Bap-BAP! Bap-Bap-BAP! Bap-Bap-BAP!
And they always offer the same moronic excuse for why they are doing this: that it “packs the tobacco”.
Bap-Bap-BAP! Bap-Bap-BAP! Bap-Bap-BAP! Bap-Bap-BAP!
As if the cigarette makers didn’t already do that. If it were true, there would be a noticeable shortening of the amount of tobacco in the cigarette - a bit of extra paper hanging out, which would of course be crushed down by the…
Bap-Bap-BAP! Bap-Bap-BAP!
They don’t know why they are doing it.
Another thing that just makes my BP go up … people who name their kids stupid names.
Like ‘Blue Ivy’ Carter.