I’m with you on that. I make no claim to being a perfect poster. I know I have many poorly done/awful posts.
Quoting George Carlin as best I can recall
Did you ever notice that everyone who drives faster than you is crazy and everyone who drives slower than you is a moron?
I have never noticed that, not have I ever thought someone cut me off on purpose or ran a signal on purpose. I always assume the best intentions and that makes my life a lot easier.
One problem with taking up the banner of “Fighting Ignorance” is that some posters make it their life mission to both prove the person wrong and get them to admit they are wrong. For instance, if Soandso says the moon is made of cheese, a quick rebuttal can prove that statement false. But some posters don’t stop there. They make it their life’s mission to make Soandso actually realize he’s wrong and admit he made a mistake. That’s often an unwinnable flight. The endless battle to change someone’s mind often derails threads. That’s when I just go PgDn-PgDn-PgDn… waiting for the thread to get back on track. Sometimes it’s better to just respond with “No it’s not” and just move on.
Sometimes, I think there’s value in remembering what not to do.
The Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory (GIFT) is a postulate which asserts that normal, well-adjusted people may display psychopathic or antisocial behaviors when given both anonymity and a captive audience on the Internet.
I try very hard to assume that the collective you are sitting right next to me on a park bench when we’re communicating.
It tends to keep me from falling too far into that ‘anonymity = causticity’ trap.
I’ll admit to having trouble with that one.
must . . . let . . . the wrong person . . . have . . . the . . . last . . . word . . . sometimes
I find it a hard thing to do.
It’s a well documented phenomenon.
yeah, that rabbit hole is very alluring.
Yeah, but…they are!
mmm
And/or it sinks unnoticed, due to lack of response.
I’ve never agreed with this view that a bad argument will win over random readers if it is not opposed, as if these readers don’t have minds of their own, and won’t know what to think unless you tell them.
If a poster makes an assertion of fact that is both unsupported and incorrect, you can make a simple statement asking for a cite.
Good points.
But some people dont know what “cite?” means, it appears.
It’s actually easier to assume everyone has the worst intentions. It works out the same way: that person wasn’t trying to screw you over in particular, so there’s no need to take it personally. But in addition to this, sometimes people surprise you by not being an asshole, which brightens your day. If instead you start out as an optimist, you can only be disappointed.
I have experienced parking lot rage a couple of times but never road rage. Parking lots don’t leave much doubt.
Raging is totally pointless (and potentially dangerous). If someone is a jerk on the road, I assume they’re an asshole or stupid. Either way, nothing will be accomplished by tailgating them, honking, etc. I back off to a safe distance and bask in the satisfaction that I was the adult in the encounter.
I’m just not sure that being nonconfrontational is always or should always be the goal. I don’t want to be confrontational always, but, when I am, I’m usually doing it on purpose. I want to confront something someone said.
The thing is, there are better and worse ways to do that, too. I’ve definitely learned to avoid some bad ways from this board.
I agree, a terse, one-word demand may not be best. “What is your evidence or outside support for this assertion” seems fairly clear.
“Cite” seems to me to be a lot clearer. People have wildly differing ideas of what counts as “evidence or outside support”. You’re liable to get “my uncle says so”.
Although I agree that occasionally somebody doesn’t know what “cite” means.
Yeah, I’m not sure “nonconfrontational” was the best choice for the thread title. It’s not that being confrontational itself is a problem. I’m focused on unnecessarily dialing up animosity.
Then you’ll know the basis of their argument, and you can respond appropriately. Anyway, a person not used to reasoned debate might give the same response to “cite?”.
I think it’s also helpful to keep these tips in mind to prevent yourself from becoming confrontational when you aren’t trying to be.