A week ago, Buddy fractured his dewclaw so I took him to the vet. They decided to sedate him to remove the claw. I stopped at the receptionist’s desk on the way out and asked for a 6 month supply of HeartGuard. She looked at his file, frowned and said, “It’s been awhile since he’s had a heartworm test.”
“He had his annual in December.”
“Oh, well the doctor will probably want to repeat it. If you give heartworm medicine to a dog that has heartworms, he may go into anaphylactic shock.”
I smiled and said through gritted teeth, “I have been giving him his heartworm medicine and he’s hasn’t gone into shock yet.”
“But it’s been over a year since you’ve gotten heartworm medicine from us. You can’t have been giving it on a regular basis…”
“I don’t give my dog heartworm medicine in the winter because there are no FLEAS. I give it to him during the summer months only.”
“Well, it’s recommended you give it to him each month.”
Me: “Well, I don’t. Can I please just have the medicine?”
“Well, I’ll have to discuss it with Dr. B. I’m sure he’ll want to do another test.”
Oh, for the love of pete! I was late for an appt so I said, “Fine, you can discuss it with him if you’d like, but know that I am NOT paying for another test. It’s a DOG and if he dies of shock, I’ll live with it. My husband will pick him up in a half hour on his way home from work. Don’t forget to give them to him because you are 1/2 hour from my home.”
She takes out a pack and puts it on top of the desk. “That’s not a problem.” She said sweetly. “IF Dr. B approves.”
Husband comes home with Buddy. $150 bill for removing a dewclew, and of course, no freaking Heartworm medicine. Nothing mentioned about a test or anything. So this means 1/2 hour trip to the vet’s office to pick it up. I call the office and the lady feigns complete ignorance re my request to give the stuff to my husband (even though both of my kids were standing there and heard the entire discussion), when in reality, I’m sure she just freaking plumb forgot. No big deal; I understand how these things happen. So I nicely ask her to mail it to me. And she says no can do.
“You are 1/2 hour away from my house. I am not making a special trip to pick up heartworm medicine, especially since I wanted to buy them when I was there and you wouldn’t let me.”
“I’m sorry, but due to postal regulations, I can’t mail out medicine.”
What a line of shit.
So I get onto the internet, find a pet medicine supplier and fill out their form. Of course, it requires a prescription so they ask for my vet’s name, which I gladly give them.
The next day I get an e-mail from the internet supplier, saying that my vet has denied authorization. My blood pressure rises and I call the vet.
“I’m calling re the internet order for heartguard.”
Same lady. “Oh, I’m so glad you called. I was going to call you. Dr. B doesn’t like working with internet companies.”
“Why is that?”
“Because they are getting sued right and left for not taking proper precautions like getting appropriate authorizations.”
Me: “Well, they obviously called you to get authorization.”
“Yes, but Dr. B doesn’t like working with them. He doesn’t want to be associated with people who get sued all the time. They are not looking out for your pet’s health.”
Me: "I understand exactly why Dr. B doesn’t want to associate with internet companies. He makes a very nice profit margin on these things and the internet is cutting into his profit. "
“That is not true. It is because he cares about your pet’s health and they do not.”
“Well, I care about my pet, too. That is why I would like to get some heartworm medicine. Will he authorize it or not?”
“He will not authorize an internet company to provide it, but if you pick up the prescription, you can take it wherever you wish.”
Me: “And you are unable to mail me the prescription?”
“It has to be done in person, I’m afraid.”
“Ma’am, you just explained to me that the reason you don’t want to deal with intenet companies is because they do not care about my pet’s health. It’s quite clear to me that you dont’ care that my pet is out of heartworm medicine because you keep putting up roadblocks preventing me from getting it. Why is this?”
“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”
Me: “You know exactly what I mean. I tell you what, I will come there in person to pick up the prescription. While I’m there I will also ask for my dog’s file because I will switch to a vet who is closer to my home. If I have to drive all over creation to get a prescription, then I might as well go to one who is convenient to me.”
“That’s your prerogative.” She said.
“I hope whatever profit you were going to make on this HeartGard was worth losing a client over.”
For the love of Christ, has it gotten so bad in veterinary medicine that the profit margin on these things is so essential that they’d risk losing a client? I have news for you. The internet ain’t going away. Either be apart of the future or get the hell out of the way.