I know a lot of you didn’t care for these movies, or that they’ve become lessened as time progresses, but they were extremely important to my (ex) family in so many ways that I wanted to mention it here.
LOTR… the films, of course… are simply the greatest artistic experience of my child’s life. No doubt about it. The LOTR movies impacted her in ways only her mother and I could see, ways in which we used to direct her moral development.
For her, it was first shown on TNT, the only channel I would allow my 5yo to have been exposed to this film at such a young age. The commercials were relentless and unavoidable, by the promised night she was bouncing off the walls with anticipation. TNT was rather notorious for editing for content, so I knew beforehand a lot of the gore and killings would be edited out.
I still don’t know if it was appropriate for a 5 year-old (probably not), but there it is. A parenting decision was made.
Pizza was ordered. Our dogs, Mackie and Shelby annoying each other, the older basset hound just wanting to lie on the heating vent while the baby Scottish terrier was eating her food.
Sophia was absolutely entranced.
She stared at the screen, constantly engaging with us about the movie, and just did not want it to end, her mother having to make sure she went to the bathroom during the commercials. And, fortunately for Sophia, it didn’t end because it was 2006, it was the weekend, and in the post 9/11 era, TNT just put their movies on repeat for the entire weekend seemingly, so Fellowship started again as soon as it was ending. WHILE it was ending, lol.
To be fair, I do not recall if all three movies were shown that weekend or if Sophia had to wait to see them or what, but for this tale’s purposes, it doesn’t matter. She had bought in, hard. Watched, rewatched, rerewatched, probably the first true fandom of her life, the first one where she wanted to know more, More, MORE.
Her mother and I discussed this, but we were never parents for whom censorship was an option. Our discussions were more along the lines of ‘how do we best frame this for Sophia’s benefit?’ Because even in how we approached entertainment, we were always on the job as parents.
And so, in talking to her about LOTR over the years, we highlighted those aspects of the story which we wanted to take root in how Sophia would face the world:
- The characters are people with a purpose. Watching it, you can feel the weight of responsibility in every frame, on every shoulder.
- The characters took things seriously. They knew when it was time for fun, but they knew when it was time for determination and grit. And most of the movies were determination and grit. As life is.
- Also, as she got older, we discussed how the actors and creators took this seriously as well. They did not play this story for camp, they are not joking, they, too, were bought in to this vision of the story.
- The characters set out to achieve a shared goal, one which would benefit none specifically, but all generally: nobody was going to get rich, but their way of life would continue. Kind of like the COVID situation, right?
- The characters worked to achieve their goals. None of what they did was easy. All of it required sacrifice and effort. All of it!
- There was a sense of nobility in how many of the characters approached each other and how they approached life. Even enemies showed respect.
- Lastly: none of the characters lost their individuality within a noble, shared-goals framework. They could still be themselves while achieving larger goals which benefitted all.
Over-and-over she watched these films, first on TNT, then on the expanded edition DVDs – what, 13 hours-worth of movie end to end on those? – soaking in these messages and more. For years. Decades. Sometimes we had long discussions about this. Sometimes I would make a comment. Sometimes her mother would say something. Constantly reinforcing the message – work, discipline, purpose, nobility, goals (shared and otherwise).
Frodo. Legolas. Gandalf. Even Sauramon, all of them working for their vision of the world with a sense of purpose and dignity rarely seen today. Why would I not want my 7 year old to imbue herself with these messages?
Our last Father’s Day together was a marathon LOTR session, starting at 8am and lasting until 1 in the morning… and I appreciated her patience when I tapped out at 9:30pm, lol.
Where most people saw a sword and sorcery epic, where fewer saw a truly literate tale of sacrifice, her mother and I saw in the LOTR movies a moral codex, a vessel by which to teach Sophia the values and expressions of behavior which are important to not just her mother and father, but towards conducting a civilized, adult life in modern society.
And, if you know me well enough, you know this worked. She is just starting her life’s Fellowship journey, spending time in America’s Rivendell, gathering friends, money, knowledge, and experience. Over time, she will have her setbacks, she will achieve greatness, and Sophia will do it with the sense of purpose, nobility, and dedication those little hobbits placed in her five-year-old heart.
Anyway, lol, I don’t expect any of you to have had the same experience - Laura and I were very intentional as parents, probably beyond normal, who knows? (No, it was beyond normal.)
But these are awesome movies, they meant (and mean) a lot to people to whom I love, and I wanted to honor the films with a little dedication.
What are your thoughts?
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