Tonight may be the night.. I think we will la la in the kitchen

She is coming over later and I am pretty sure tonight is the night. The BIG night. The night we finally get to la la. I have candles and rose petals everywhere and I am wearing my french maid outfit. Hopefully after I pour the milk all over my body she will finally want to la la. What else should I know before doing the ol’ la la besides what I am doing already? It is my first time so I am really nervous. How was your first time? Anyways, I should finish getting ready cause she will be over soon. Wish me luck!

You’re dressing up and acting out a song to create the scene for your first time and you actually want it to be in the kitchen? Darned uncomfortable, in my experience. And what if she’s lactose intolerant? Why not let love and passion set the stage, and leave the stage-setting for later in the relationship?

Must still be la-la-ing, or drowned in the milk.

Well, we came to an awkward place. We were not sure if we were supposed to lick the milk off before or after we were covered in dirt. We also never really planned out the diamond part, either. All in all it was a major disapointment. Hell, I think she even moved on to an actual alley cat. Eh, thus is life eh? No one ever lets you la la in peace now adays.