Trapped boring machine; personally, I wouldn't want to have it at a cocktail party

I saw this headline several times and finally had to click on it, just to find out what it was about:

“Boring machine rescue nearly triples in price, according to new city report”

It turns out that it’s a tunnel boring machine, not one that is so inert that it’s not possible to have an interesting discussion about it.

Short version:

  • residents in the Old Mill area of Toronto regularly complained of flooded basements;
  • Toronto city engineers concluded that a new drainage tunnel was needed;
  • because the new drain would run under the subway, the tunnel had to be built deep and remotely, via a ta-da! boring machine, worth about $3 million;
  • once in operation, the boring machine became entangled in metal cables / rebar associated with the subway construction;
  • poor thing is trapped and estimated cost for extrication (in pieces) has steadily expanded, from an original estimate of $9 million, now approaching $25 million;
  • Don Mills residents still have flooded basements.

Sounds like the poster child for an engineering project gone wrong?

Does it keep weakly calling “help me, help me, help me” ad nauseam?

When I was a kid, whenever I saw a sign posted in front of a machine shop saying “boring worker wanted” it always made me chuckle. Yes, I was an easily amused kid.

Maybe they should just move the city instead.

But what other Canadians would want Toronto near them? << shudder >>

$9 million could waterproof lots of basements. Just sayin’

Although I suppose it is appropriate that “Toronto the Good” has a problem with a boring machine.

I always enjoyed seeing the “Slow men working” signs. Meant the kids who lived near the “slow children playing” signs could find jobs eventually.

It is terribly, terribly sad that this happened in Toronto.
It should have happened in a small town in Maryland.

(wait for it…)
1…
2…
3…Boring, Maryland
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  1. Boring, Oregon.

I have a horizontal boring machine. I’m going to give you a chance to consider a possible filthy interpretation of that before pointing out that it’s just a sideways drill press, which sounds faintly naughty as well. Once past those notions it is simply a boring boring machine.

Since they appear to be bringing it up in pieces, it may start singing Daisy Bell towards the end.

A similar thing happened in Seattle not long ago.

fun fact about the Chunnel (under the English Channel):
After the tunnel was completed, and the boring machine used by the British was no longer needed, they got rid of it by…programming it to dig itself down into a patch of ground, and then remain buried.
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cite:
QI, so you know it has to be true.QI | Who Made Sure The Channel Tunnel Met In The Middle? - YouTube

You can say a lot of things about any company owned by Elon Musk, but not that it’s….

I used to go by a landscaping business with a sign out front that said “BARK”. My usual response was “woof.”

Mine happened when I was in college.

A boring machine named “Hazel” is currently making her way under the Potomac from Alexandria, Va. The goal is a wastewater pipe to reach the treatment facility across the way.

I have wondered whether she might not hit similar difficulties when she gets to the DC side. DC is both over-built and built-over. It’s anybody’s guess what you’ll find once you dig more than ten feet down.
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Does anyone else find it odd that boring machines are always given feminine names?

I once went to a town in New Brunswick – was it Moncton? – which is famous for what are known as tidal bores – which are actually, just very sudden but regular tidal surges in the Bay of Fundy; I have no idea why they’re called “bores.” But in the middle of town was (is?) a sign that says “Next Bore Arrives At” followed by the time of the next one.

Here you go:

Lots more cool info in the rest of that article. Baby bores (the offspring of grown-up bores) are called “whelps”.

Boring machine still trapped. Timeline for rescue prolonged. Torontonians expostulate.