We are going to visit my daughter this month. I would like to hear about experiences regarding the exchange of gifts. I know that they should be small tokens of appreciation, so I dont want to over do it. I would like to know if there are things from the US that they would really love to get. Obviously stuff they cant find easily at home. I’ll be spending most of my time between Nagoya and Tokyo.
Thanks
For whom are the gifts?
You should ask them personally, the answers are likely so personal no one on this board could divine it.
I’d assume that these would be gifts for other people than Snake Plissken’s daughter – there’s a cultural expectation of small gifts for people that you meet in Japan.
It could be candy or cookies – but perhaps you should avoid chocolate in February, since people give chocolates on Valentine’s Day in Japan, and they might be suffering from chocolate overload!
Your location isn’t in your profile, but just about anything “local” from where you are would be appreciated. Small things could be about anything. Bottles of local wine, salmon if you’re from Alaska or Seattle, maple syrup from Vermont, bourbon from Tennese, etc. Edible stuff is good, expecially if it comes in a dozen or similar large quantity that can be shared. If there are kids involved, then bringing over Costco and/or Halloween sized bag of candy is always a winner.
Local Tchotchkes also work.
Now, if you’re daughter has a prospective son in law to meet, or there’s a host family or some other relationship that you *really *want to show your appreciation for, then we could work on specifics for something nicer.
Thankyou for your replies. I’m in Minnesota. Is there much fresh water fishing in Japan? Various lures and such might be appreciated by sportsmen.
My daughter is playing pro volleyball there, so I definately want to get something for her coaches and teamates. I’ll be dining with the CEO of the company that owns her team. do you think that a Joe Mauer signed ball would be well received? I know baseball is big in Japan. Just not sure if they are familiar with the Twins.
Freshwater fishing is moderately popular but not at all universal. You’d need to do a bit of legwork. Fishing would be a more oyaji (old guy) thing than something that would apply to young hipsters, urbanites, or women.
I would say a shirt or baseball cap from a well-known U.S. sports team would be welcome.
I also certainly believe that local food delicacies will always work. Maple syrup was a great suggestion. At Christmas, I did Virginia ham (huge success) and Kentucky Franciscan fudge (none of which they’d ever get there, and both of which totally suit the Japanese palate). You’re probably committing a minor violation of JP customs, but come on, who cares? Similarly, my Christmas presents from JP included fugu and uni. Local delicacies are a huge thing both intra-Japan and internationally.
Depending on your audience, and you’d need to know them well, some CDs that are available in the U.S. are not available, or are expensive, in Japan.
Finally, on the oyaji note – good American wine and whiskey are (whiskey in particular) almost unknown and/or super-expensive in Japan. If your audience includes old guys, a somewhat-obscure Bourbon or rye will go over a treat. If it’s women, a beautiful if cheap Oregon or Finger Lakes Riesling or Sauvignon will be very special to them.
I’ll echo China Guy in that the emphasis should be on “local”, here. Most gifts are consumable. Any kind of local specialty you can find will likely do. Something like a local dried meat would probably go over well (but make sure it’s sealed in plastic for customs). If you can find some kind of local hand-made sweets/chocolates (individually packaged) I think that would be a perfect gift for your daughter’s teammates.
Although it’s an oft-expressed sentiment, this is a time when it really is “the thought that counts.” Most of the omiyage received in Japan is pretty generic snack food with the name of the area it was bought at slapped on it. It’s given to people to show that you thought of them and is welcomed for that reason, not so much because people expect to get anything truly nice.
I see the Twins signed a Japanese player who fairly famous in Japan (Nishioka), so it’s likely that they’ll a baseball fan will have heard of them. (MLB team awareness in Japan is reliant more or less solely on the presence of a famous Japanese player.)
I agree with Huerta88 that a nice obscure bottle of bourbon would also be a good choice, especially for the CEO.
OK, here is the protocol for gifts in this situation.
Going to dinner with the CEO is an honor, and you should give a nice gift. The company is fairly good size, and the CEO is in his 60s, so expect a business formal affair. Bring your suit unless specifically told otherwise.
A high end bourbon is an excellent choice, and has the advantage of the local connection, as many bourbons are aged in casks made from white oak from northern Minnesota. It would be better if you can verify that the bourbon was made from white oak from Minnesota, but even not, just being able to say that will be a good connection. I would also give the signed baseball. Even if he is not familiar with the Twins, it is a good connection.
If it were me and my daughter, I would spend at least $100 to $200 for the CEO. YMMV.
Next, give a good gift for the manager and head coach. Nowhere nearly as expensive as for the CEO. This is important, but because you are honoring the CEO by giving him the best present.
You can have your daughter find out if they like fishing, but unless you know for sure, I wouldn’t do it.
Also give gifts for the relevant people from the parent company who have responsibility for the team. The website lists four people, including a general manager. Again, these do not need to be expensive, but I would go with something local.
Bring token gifts for the trainers and for the teammates, as well as for other people who have been helpful for there. Probably a slightly better one for the team translator, as she will be helpful for your daughter.
Finally, bring a large box of cookies for the admin staff of the head office.
Be sure to bring some other inexpensive gifts just in case.
Enjoy your stay!
Another thing to be prepared for: don’t be offended if your gifts are shunted off to obscurity after you hand them over.
This tripped me up when I first went there, and I got a little offended that what I gave was ignored, until I realised that it was just the custom.
It will indeed be opened and appreciated when you’re not around. It’s just that opening and cooing over gifts is not the done thing for most people.
My experience exactly. Japanese take great delight in regional stereotypes/delicacies, and you’re right, the name of the geographic region will be prominently slapped on the package. Anyone coming from, say, Shimonoseki (near Hiroshima, and known for its seafood) would hardly dream of not bringing their Tokyo colleagues some Yamaguchi Prefecture seafood specialities (uni, fugu, whatever), and the folks in Tokyo would be tickled by the local delicacies from the hinterlands.
On that note – Minnesota’s got a lot of lakes, so I hear. Are there any local versions of good preserved fish (smoked walleye, pike pate, etc.)? No one has EVER gone wrong offering fish to a Japanese person, and the varieties you get up there will be novel to them, and they’ll love the imagery (once you explain it) of the ten thousand lakes.
Wow! Thanks for the replies. This is very helpful. My daughter is the only english speaking player on the team so she has a personal interpreter. I imagine I should get her something nice. I will definately take care of the CEO. Great sugestions.
Just one more thing. When are these normally presented, and should they be wrapped or decorated in any way?
At the beginning or more likely the end of your first meeting.
You will say: “______-san, I have a little thing for you from my hometown. It is not much, it’s not very good, but I hope you might like it.” You will approximate a bow, they will bow, an awkard silence will ensue and then hopefully you’ll go to dinner or out drinking. As noted, they won’t likely unwrap it then.
It definitely should be elaborately wrapped. The Japaense are kings of wrapping. (You will get a kick out of shopping there – the drugstore will give you a very nice bag, taped shut, for your purchase of cough syrup or whatever).
Yes, be nice to your daughter’s interpreter. In social situations, take note of the fact that she is or should be “off the clock” during meals, but people may try to lean on her to interpret the table talk too, which is kind of uncool as she’s trying to eat, drink, whatever. Try not to buy into that.
I’m pretty prepared. I’ve been using text fugu to learn Japanese. I know all the Hiragana characters and I know how to pronounce them. I can read and speak it, but I dont have any idea what I’m saying yet. Thats my next step. Hope I can figure it out before the 23rd.
You are way, way ahead of 95% of gaijin who visit. Knowing hiragana is something you can (politely and situationally) get a lot of mileage out of. Learning to say hello, thank you, I’d like some water please (“omizu kudasai”), will work wonders. They expect so little of us that any efforts will work wonders. They will be tickled pink.
Snake, would you be comfortable sharing your daughter’s name in a PM? My Japanese homestay dad is head of the Aichi Prefectural Women’s Volleyball Assn (located in Nagoya), and I’d love to know if you’ll be meeting him. Or you can ask your daughter if she knows (Mr.) Hiromi Kameyama. He is a professor at Meijo University.
It might be a long shot, as I think his role is, in addition to showing up at the matches, attending endless meetings and then paying for everyone’s dinner. He coached women’s volleyball for years but has since retired from that.
I had a reply typed out to you yesterday re giftgiving, but lost the damn thing, and you’ve gotten excellent replies here already, so I think you’re in good shape.
I asked my friend who is from Minnesota:
If you have time, learn Katakana. Hiragana is used mostly to write Japanese grammatical endings, and won’t do you much good at all. Katakana is used to write foreign words, most of which are English. After a little practice, you’ll be able to read quite a bit.
For every Hiragana, there is a corresponding Katakana. If you learned one, it shouldn’t be too hard to learn the other.
I’m coming a bit late to this, but I would advise against lures. For one, people always appreciate consumables more. Even if you’re rich, space is at a premium, and throwing stuff that doesn’t burn in the trash is a bit of a p.i.t.a., so gifts that don’t take up room forever are always better. Furthermore, even on the off chance that the person you’re giving the gift to is a fisherman, there’s a very good chance that Japanese fish won’t take a liking to Minnesota lures.
I agree. The gift should be representative of where the gift giver is from (or somehow related to that), recognizably a prestige brand, and wrapped well.
I wouldn’t go overboard and try to imitate Japanese gift wrapping. No need to “go native” here, but do wrap it neatly and tastefully.
Another important ritual when meeting someone in Japan is the exchange of business cards. Hopefully, you have some already. When handed someone’s business card, you should look at it, and maybe say something about it-- perhaps ask about the pronunciation of his name, if nothing else comes to mind. Put it neatly away somewhere. If someone gives you his business card, and you just stash it in your pocket, it’s considered disrespectful.