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People introducing themselves by, and generally being known exclusively by, their first name only. “Hi, I’m Mike.” Great! Mike WHO?! Have you ever considered that I might know other Mikes, and thus need additional information to differentiate you from them? If I want to look your number up in the phone book, should I just look under “Mike”? If I run into someone whom I think might know you, and I want to confirm, should I ask, “Hey, do you know Mike?”
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(extremely unpopular opinion alert) Tan skin being considered attractive. I yearn for the days I’m always hearing about when, in our society, a tan was a sign that you had to work outdoors, and thus PALE skin was considered attractive. I don’t want to sound like a racist here, and I can appreciate the attractiveness of non-Caucasian women, but as a white male who is attracted primarily to white females, I prefer said white females to have beautiful, soft, smooth, creamy… pale skin. It breaks my heart in the summertime when all the women start ‘working on their tans.’ I always want to say to them “What are you doing? You’re ruining your beautiful pale skin!”
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I second elmwood on the business-speak. Worse than Orwellian Newspeak, because it has absolutely no meaning whatsoever.
Hey! I like platform shoes on chicks with tiny feet. 
On guys, they don’t look so good.
You some kind of intolerant culturalist? Curling is a long-standing sport in Winter heavy countries with an impressive tradition. Would you replace it with another recent, radling, lets-give-the-USA-a-gold-medal sport?
Yep, clothes are one trend I’ll be happy to see :ahem: disappear.
I have to second the tan thing. I’ve hated tans since I can remember. People shouldn’t look like toast.
Upon pondering, I’d also like to vote for cars.
Use the paved roads for 2-wheelers, the way they were meant to be!
“My bad.” What the…? You want your wittle ba ba?
Lowered vehicles with a widened wheel base. This is especially horrifying on pickup trucks.
I’ll third the nomination for hating tans. I can look old from many, many other things (smoking, drinking, wild, scandalous sex late at night, etc…) other than tanning. And I can get cancer from other sources, as well. Thanks anyway!
Already mentioned in another thread that I don’t like the “cropped” pants. Blech. No water waders for me. Looks like somebody got hold of the Goodwill box before it was picked up and went, “Oooooh! Pants that are too short for me!! I LOVE them!!”
I think I read the whole thread, but in case I missed it, anybody else just about tired of the “email” or “internet” lingo? I mean, “peeps”, “u r kewl”, etc…? You’d think by now folks would learn how to write plainly, but it’s like they just keep on searching for ways to look and behave like illiterates.
Of course, I’m sure many of them can’t help that. But they could shut the hell up! 
Hey, BACK OFF MY CAPRIS!!! These are the ones that end a few inches below the knees-not right above the ankles! With an over sized white men’s shirt, sandals, a little scarf-it’s very Jackie O.
Tans-ugh. As my 7th grade teacher told us, that “healthy tan” is UNhealthy. You’re literally cooking your skin. It’s not good for you, it’s bad, bad BAD!!!
For the love of God, yes! Trucks were made for a reason: haulin’ stuff from point A to point B! Those stupid people (who always seem to be late teens to late twenties guys who wear those baggy, low-rider pants, and bandanas on their heads) should not be allowed to buy trucks! Every time I see a poor truck mangled like that I weep a little. I don’t even see the appeal they have to those people. Why would you pay more money for a vehicle you are never going to use properly? Why not just save money and buy the car that is made to be low to the ground? You can even fit more of your “ho’s” in it.
*note: I don’t mean to offend or sterotype anyone with the “hos” remark, made merely in jest to the drivers of those trucks who do, in fact, have “ho’s”
The good news is that people have stopping finishing a sentence and then adding, “Not!” If only all fads ha a short lifespan.
The bad news is the trend to insert numerals into words. “2day U will go 4ward.” Is that supposed to be cute?
And are any of you annoyed when someone with the superloud car stereo will go into a Stewart’s or convenient mart and leave the simplistic gibberish blasting while they’re in there? Is this a way of seeing how much you can impose on other people?
Here’s a fad I’ve unfortunatly seen (It may be an isolated occurance): guys with their shirts unbuttoned halfway down to their navels. I don’t need to see your hairy chest.
If old clothes are out, does that mean I can’t wear my wooden tie?
Truly, I have found my people. I also despise tans. I like the ‘creamy’ look. Here are a few other trends that make me blind with rage:
- Yes, those goddamned The Fast & the Furious imported, souped-up cars. Especially the ones with the big freakin’ decals plastered all over them. (Does this not decrease visibility during your ‘drag races’, kids?) And these damned car guys who care about them! I understand you enjoy your hobby- but are you so ignorant of the basic laws of physcis that you actually believe painting a big stripe on your car will make it go faster?
1a) The way all these car guys have no clue the above-mentioned movie is just some re-hashed James Dean-type thing.
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Suburban commandos taking up all the good parking spots with their SUV’s and/or ‘luxury trucks’. WTF!? Why don’t you park in the grass? It’s what the damned thing is for!
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This Sex & The City fashion/culture thing going, what with the capri pants, thongs, and faux-fur cowboy hats. Women who dress and talk like this do not work at high-powered corporations- they work on street corners. Please.
(Attn. thong-wearers: I respect your underwear choice and do not castigate you for it. I do not find them comfy, but maybe I should try a bigger size? Also, capri pants are ugly as a fashion item, but they do work well with rubber knee boots when you’re relocating frogs. No pants bunching up around your ankles.) -
Women who keep confusing being a slut with being ‘sexually liberated.’ You are giving the rest of us a bad name. I understand you feel that stripping is somehow ‘personally empowering’. Good for you. Here’s a big freakin’ Bra-Burning Award. Please leave the stripping jobs to the women who need the money and have the talent, not the women who read an article in Cosmopolitan or who get all teary-eyed and chest-thumping over Demi Moore.
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People who cannot tell the difference between a musician and a corporate product. (You know who you are.)
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The following expressions:
“Duuuuuuude!”
“Whaaaaaaaa?”
“Braaaaaaaa!”
“Waaazzzuuuupppp?”
“like” inserted randomly into sentences, although it is perfectly appropriate if you habitually incorporate similies into your everyday speech.
“I be, s/he be, we be, you be, etc.” Conjugate, for the love of Christ!
Past participles used inappropriately, such as “I seen that!” and “I been there!” Helping verb! Argh!
Corporate jargon and babble, as well as touchy-feely terms used in everyday speech.
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Pants that do not fit, because they are either large enuogh to shelter a small fishing village, or because they are so tight the wearer first liquefied their lower extremities, T-1000 fashion, and then poured themselves into their pants. Clothes are sized for a reason, kids.
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Itty-bitty shirts, and their accompanying dreadful slogans. Bearing your midriff is a privilege, not a right. Little poochy bellies are cute, but if you can use your excess flesh as an apron, you’re flagged. Get a bigger shirt.
I’m sure there is more, but I will go away now and calm down.
OK, that’s bad, but NeaRlY As BaD aS MiXInG CaPiTalS aNd LoWeR cASe LetTers.
Gratuitous use of new smiley:
:smack:
Corporate garbagespeak
Spitting on the pavement/sidewalk
Off road vehicles on the road. If you think Toyota Landcruisers & BMW X5’s are inappropriate in US cities, imagine the nightmare in London.
I like capri-length pants for a few reasons. 1) they are more comfortable to me. 2) they are cooler (temperature wise) than long pants. 3) I can’t wear shorts because it hurts when my thighs rub together.
Little girls dressed like Cosmo vixens.
REALLY short bangs. Yikes!
gym shoes without backs.
I’m getting a little burned out on excessive tattooing, especially when the tattoos are poorly executed.
Fake tits.
Bumper Stickers in the form of My kid is a SUPER KID at Jerkwater Junior High!. Nobody gives a rat’s ass, mommy. You going to keep that sticker when your kid gets busted for smoking weed?
The Fashionably holier-than-thou comments that the Politically Correct posers and hypocrites make, such as when they demonize SUVs…as if their own cars didn’t pollute or take up space.
Bottled water. Whoever came up with the idea of filling a plastic bottle with tap water and charging $2 for it is laughing all the way to the bank.
Fake tits?! I like fake tits – as well as real ones!