'04 when they plan on “Knocking the ass off those two hayseeds in the next U.S. election.” The two hayseeds declined to comment.
The stock market today…
…called in sick with a mild flu. Bed rest has been prescribed, and plenty of fluids.
This just in…
…Dateline New York City, January 12. Since they discovered that their birthdays are on the same day and the parties were in the same hotel, in rooms on opposite sides of the same hallway, Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern announced that they were quitting the broadcast media, to go into partnership in the business of…
Pornography.
They both are avid readers of it anyway.
They’re first collaboration will be a shocking one; a nude centerfold of…
…Ross Perot. Perot, anxious to return to the media spotlight, agreed wholeheartedly to the idea, reportedly stating that…
“the rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain!”
“By George, she’s got it!”
Then Rex Harrison’s estate was…