Three years ago at my older sister’s 50th birthday party, I gave her a ‘Happy 40th Birthday’ card. Inside I wrote: “Don’t you wish it was only 40?” She nodded yes with a rather solemn look on her face.
I’m 51 now. Yeah, getting older is scary in a lot of ways. But it’s also really good in a lot of other ways. I would encourage you to think about the ways that both you, and your life, are better than they were 10 or 20 years ago. You might not want to go back.
Ok, it’s not that serious. Really.
I’m mildly irritated by the fact that when I balance my checking account (which, thanks to online banking I do about once a week), I have to keep accounting for an outstanding check. Bank account says +$125, I’m like “Oh, right the fiddle lesson check”. I also don’t understand the randomness of when he deposits his checks. If I was collecting payment on or around the first of each month, I would take those checks to the bank around the same time, say the 10th of the month, each month. I wouldn’t do it on the 10th one month, the 24th the next, and the month after that wait 6 weeks deposit the check. I concede that he is allowed to deposit whenever he wants. I just find it irritating…but not enough to do anything other than mildly rant about it here.
I have a small but annoying pimple on my flippin’ earlobe. Dafuq? Who gets a zit on the side of their ear? Me, that’s who. Apparently.
I have bills to pay and some personal paperwork to attend to and I’m pretty sure I’m gonna ignore all of it to zone out in front of *Sopranos *reruns for the entire evening and then kick myself tomorrow for it. Ah, well - that’s what tomorrow is for, right?
Ha ha! You’re going to be 40! Ha!
<sigh> I remember 40…
Attn: Telemarketer person:
Being from a Christian group does not make you important enough for me to give you my mother’s contact information while she is on vacation.
Especially when you pronounce her name wrong.
Frankly, even if you were a person from our church, with truly important information, I would very likely not have given you my mom’s cell phone number.
As it is, I don’t care if you call back-- but I will hang up as soon as you give me your name, because I have now identified you as a pest who doesn’t know how to take no for an answer.
So…I have an ulcer on my leg, and I went to see the doctor about it. Got an antibiotic pill and antibiotic cream, and a recommendation to a wound care center. Oh, good, turns out I’m allergic to THIS oral antibiotic, too. Fortunately, the cream doesn’t produce any negative side effects.
I went back to the doctor today, and she said that my treatment has been effective enough that I don’t need to go to wound care any more. Except that my insurance has never approved the wound care, so I haven’t been going. It’s a damn good thing that I know how to treat skin ulcers at home, without medical supervision.
On the other hand, at least I don’t have to go to wound care treatments. I hate those.
Hon, you’re a nice person and I’m sorry you have advanced breast cancer. I’m glad you’re even alive considering how late they caught it. But when you’re getting food stamps, housing assistance and all kinds of other help from the government, you look really hypocritical when you post Tea Party shit calling for people to get off welfare. I’d rather tolerate a little fraud than have someone like you refused medical treatment or food.
I’ve had that happen to me. Beats in a convolution of the outer ear.
Strange, I’m now 44 and have had much more trouble with acne in middle age than I ever did in my teens.
I just wasted an hour and a half of my life watching What Dreams May Come. Holy shit, that was disjointed. Even having watched the entire thing, I still have no idea what the fuck just happened.
Dang Lynn. Doesn’t it tend to tick you off when you know more than the highly paid experts. I don’t know a lot about human health, but I have been known to blow vets off because I knew better.
Anyhow, I’m glad that you were able to deal with your ulcer. I hope you don’t get more. I honestly do worry about you a lot.
My Bill is growing a mustash. Why, you ask? Its because he can. I like kissing clean shaven men. I also liked kissing men with well groomed facial hair. I don’t like kissing someone with a brillo pad on their upper lip. Its very possible that I’m going to give up kissing men for the next couple of days because the only man I kiss now isn’t very kissable with that sandpaper under his nose.
Looking back, I had a blast in my 40s. And in my 50s. And, surprise, I’m having a blast in my 60s, too.
The way I look at it, you get to leave behind the neurotic parts of your youth*, but keep the fun parts**.
*like worrying about what people are thinking about you (hint: they’re not), or fretting about a bad haircut (a handy side effect of losing it).
**yeah, I’m still taking off work to run off to another city to see a cool band.
Movember is coming up. Start comparing other men’s moustaches favorably to his at every opportunity. When he asks how his measures up, say “Meh.”
Or claim that you’re not getting your MDR of kisses and start kissing clean-shaven guys.
I have informed Suburban Plankton that should he decide to participate in Movember, I reserve the right to kiss other clean-shaven men for the same period of time. He has agreed, but considering all his facial hair now comes in completely grey, I’m pretty sure he won’t be participating.
This “proposed” 28th Amendment has been going around on Facebook:
“Congress shall make no law that applies to the citizens of the United States that does not apply equally to the Senators and/or Representatives; and, Congress shall make no law that applies to the Senators and/or Representatives that does not apply equally to the citizens of the United States.”
I, for one, look forward to my new 6-figure salary, because hey, those salary bills have to apply equally to citizens, right?
There’s a saying that “a kiss without a moustache is like a fried egg without salt”. Dunnow, I kind’a don’t feel the same way about both…
But if you subtract the amount out right away and reconcile your bank statement when it comes, why would you have to keep them in the back of your mind. The money’s already gone and accounted for.
Maybe I’m old fashioned or something, but I still use a check register and subtract every check I write and reconcile my bank statement at the end of the month. I don’t have near enough money not to do that.
I use Quicken to do the same thing but - when my online balance and my quicken balance don’t match I spend a few mins verifying that it is indeed outstanding items instead of a bank error (in my favour?) or an entry error on my part. I also don’t like people who sit on things forever.
God, I hate FedEx SmartPost, and whatever the UPS mutation is, (and random capitalization while I’m at it) with a passion. If you’re going to use USPS, use it all the way and if you are going to use FedEx, use it all the way. I know this is a small town, but FedEx will deliver to a house, I’ve seen them do it. Hell, they’ve done it at my house, so I know it can be done. Plus, the goddamn post office is only two blocks away.
Last night, when I went to pick up TheKid, my truck was making Very Unpleasant Noises. There was sproingy sounds, metal rubbing metal, creaking. Quite like the sounds it made when the front end was going.
I figured, maybe it was the rain. I’ve noticed when I’ve left her out in the rain, she can be squeaky for a little bit. So she spent the night in the garage.
This morning the VUN continued. Luckily, the shop was willing to get her in today.
They just called. I braced myself for bad news.
A mother fucking rat bastard squirrel tried to make the rear rotors his storage room during the 4 hours my vehicle was outside yesterday. My mechanic pulled out a pile of walnuts.
I am so thankful that’s all it was, but still. Squirrels? Bastards.
I very much dislike salt on my fried eggs, so, I can agree with this.