Okay, I’m not sure if this goes here or Cafe, so, mods, please feel free to move if appropriate.
These are my first attempts at writing poetry since grade school or something. I was wondering what other people thought of them (be brutal, I can take it). Just as a warning they’re not exactly happy-happy material.
Last Breath
Alone the old man sits,
Staring off into space.
Silently he sits there,
Chair rocking with slow pace.
Recalling his whole life;
Blank look upon his face.
Memories - life wasted;
Regretful of his place,
No legacy to give,
No honor has he won.
His entire life for naught -
For now his time is done.
Now a smile on his face,
He takes one final breath.
Tired, he reaches out
To shake the hand of Death.
Columbia
Smoke and fire around you fly,
As you climb into the sky.
We wonder how you tame your fear
As we watch you disappear.
'Round and 'round the Earth you soar,
Like some hero of ancient lore.
You have slipped Earth’s surly bond
And seen her beauty from beyond.
Coming down from that place -
Back to Earth from outer space -
Streaks of flame across the sky,
We watch in horror as you die.
Gone, like heros of the past.
In our hearts your spirits last.
Courage and honor have you borne.
At your lost, we all now mourn.