Well, you should have put it in a safer place. 
Mine was having post-op pain meds FORGOTTEN after I had my gallbladder out. Woke up in recovery room not knowing how to talk and making faces at the attendant like some kind of crazy mime.
I remember someone here on the board describing the savlia “high” something like this:
If a weed high is like decent sex, then a salvia high is like being molested in the basement by your creepy older slobby uncle in sweat pants.
Or something like that.
Not long after I had my second child, I ended up with a kidney stone. After seeing a urologist, I had to go do one of those tests where they inject you with some kind of dye and then take an x-ray to see whether you’re dealing with a pebble, a handful of pebbles or the damned Blarney Stone that it felt like. So they tell me the dye injection might make me feel a little flush and a little nauseated. Notice the use of “might” and “a little” from the lying freakin’ bastards. They injected the dye and for the first few seconds I was fine, felt nothing and started to relax a bit until suddenly there was a rush of heat, more like FIRE, coursing through every vein in my body followed by a tidal wave of nausea the likes of which I had never experienced - even worse than the night that I drank 3/4 of a bottle of Boone’s Farm Apple Wine as a young inexperienced teenager.
I have no idea how I managed not to vomit, coming close enough that I was deciding on an appropriate receptacle when the wave subsided, along with the intense internal heat. And all of this on top of the pain of a kidney stone, which is itself worse than giving birth to a 9lb child.
No, I really don’t want to go there again.
I watched my oldest and dearest friend starve to death from pancreatic cancer. Took months, after he started to look like an concentration camp survivor.
And giving birth to an eleven pound newborn without benefit of medication of any kind. (That’s 5 kilo for you metric users.)
Really understanding that someone I love will die in prison.
Buying a house. A nightmare. Everything that could have gone wrong did. Most stressful thing I’ve ever done.
Feeling of a gun barrel pressed against my head.
Yes. This.
Falling off a cliff, getting stuck in a tree at the base of said cliff, breaking my way out of said tree to fall the rest of the way to the ground, and then having to swim the flood swollen Mississippi to get out of that predicament, all in the same night.
Man, college is fun…
Pneumonia.
Watching a Loved One die of cancer.
Watching a Loved One being poisoned nearly to death to kill a cancer.
The last 5 years or so of my first marriage.
Nearly dying from accidental ammonia exposure.
I had a huge absess under my left molar and was lying on my couch waiting for my neighbor to come home to ask her if she would take me to the emergency room.
When I heard her come in, I went to look at the clock to see what time it was. I hit that side of my jaw and bit down hard.
I grabbed the side of my face and ran up and down my two room apartment a few hundred times. I then lay down on the floor and thought “Fuck this. I’m not even going to make it to the hospital.”
Next thing I knew it was 4:00 a.m. and the pain was gone. I went to my dentist, who said the absessed had burst and drained.
It makes a neat story, but once was enough.
Got some sort of X-Ray that involved contrast injection when I was a teen. They said I’d feel a slight flush, and to let them know if I had any problems breathing. Of course, it became very difficult to breathe but they had left the room so there was no way to tell them! I didn’t end up suffocating, but the sensation was very panic inducing.
Add another vote for kidney stone. Gallstones didn’t hurt that much, but they came close.
I had surgery to remove the kidney stone. When I woke up, the doctor told me that they had put a shunt in to keep things open and to come back to the office on Friday and they would take it out. Simple procedure.
Lying bastard. I go in and go through the experience of having ice-cold local anesthetic pumped up my johnson. The doctor then comes in and shoves a probe about the size of an aluminum baseball bat up my johnson, then starts looking for the end of the shunt, which has apparently shifted. After what seems to be about three weeks, he finally locates it, grabs it with the little claw-grabby-thingy on the end of the probe and pulls it out like someone pulling the starter cord on a lawnmower.
I cannot begin to describe to you how that felt. Suffice to say that was in 1988 and my johnson has retracted up behind my breastbone from the memories as I typed this. :eek::eek:
Iraq
A few years ago I went riverboarding below Victoria Falls in Africa.
Riverboarding, for those that don’t know it, is like whitewater rafting only instead of a big inflatable raft you have a tiny polystyrene float, like a boogie-board.
The first stage was in a proper raft, and seemed pretty hairy even in that (they were Grade V rapids). Then we had to jump out of the raft, just me and one other guy stupid enough to do it.
I’m usually well up for adrenaline sports but I was convinced I was going to drown, and it’s not a nice feeling. You know when you get a mouthful of water and it’s no big deal, as long as you can spend a few seconds coughing it up and getting your breath back? Imagine that but repeated over and over as you get somersaulted around under water with only the briefest second to grab a breath every now and again…
Both of us had our boards ripped out of our hands almost immediately by the rapids - they were leashed to our wrists but out of reach. Eventually the other guy managed to grab a board. My board. I tried to grab it off him and he was literally ready to fight me for it as we headed towards the next rapid, and I don’t blame him.
When I made it out of the water I had to climb a few hundred feet up and out of the gorge. My legs were shaking so much I could hardly walk at first, but I have never felt an adrenaline high like it. I had a buzz for about two days afterwards which was fantastic, but I am NOT doing it again!
2 broken arms. At the same time.
Liver biopsy. Before the procedure, they go through a list of the things that can happen that might be a bit painful, but they are rare, so don’t worry about them. I have now experienced all of them, at once. And the 3 grains of morphine and 2 Tylenol with Codeine did nothing for any of them. 
Coughing. For 3 months. With any exertion making it worse. To the point that if I had to keep trying to do something (because the doctor refuses to fax anything anywhere and work needs the forms now or else and no one else is available) I passed out from lack of oxygen because I was coughing air out faster than I could get it in. (But the doctor didn’t want to give me a work slip, because it was just a cough.)
Abscess under a molar. Taking 2 vicodin every 4 hours, so it will stop hurting long enough to doze for the middle 2 hours between doses. This lasted for a couple of centuries until the dentist opened in the morning.
Getting the jaw bone just past the rear bottom molar ground down 1/4 of an inch in order to be able to properly fit a crown on the molar. Did you know it is possible for an oral surgeon and 2 nurses to all have both of their hands in your mouth at the same time? This was not exceptionally painful, I only needed 2 vidodin, 1 at a time, 6 hours apart afterward to handle the pain. So only slightly worse then my wisdom tooth extraction. But it was extremely unpleasant despite the professionalism of the surgeon.
Ah, a crown lengthening. I had this done last summer. The procedure itself wasn’t too bad really though the stitches rubbing against the inside of my mouth were majorly irritating. A couple of days after it was done I got a teeny, weeny piece of food caught under the temporary crown causing much inflammation and much hurting. Nope, don’t want to do that again either.
Appendicitis - they never took it out, just pumped me full of antibiotics and kept me in the hospital for a week. Did I mention it was the week of Thanksgiving?
Being told by my ex that he was moving out as we were sitting at a kids’ birthday party. I guess he timed it that way so I wouldn’t make a scene. I waited till we got home for that. (I don’t usually talk shit about him like this, but that time hurt.)
Getting caught in gunfire while out shopping with my mom when I was 9 and having to take refuge in the back room of a drugstore with 20 or so other people.
This isn’t nearly as bad as most of the others, but while whitewater rafting on the New River in West Virginia, a wave sent me off the raft and into the river, just as we entered a rapid called “Hell Hole.” The guide told us we wanted to make sure not to fall out in this rapid, and I did! I’d been whitewater rafting many times before, but knowing that I was going through this hole called “Hell Hole” made it very frightening. I grabbed onto the side of the raft and didn’t let go until we were out of the rapid. But there were so many waves that I felt like I was drowning, as I struggled to keep my head above water. I finally got hauled back into the raft. Overall it was a very fun trip, and I would go rafting again, I just don’t want to fall into the rapids again!
Kidney stones. Had no idea what the pain was, just that there was a LOT of it.
Nuclear Power School. Ever have a waist high stack of books on a variety of subjects ranging from fluid dynamics to reactor physics shoved through your head in 6 months? And the wonderful final exam that was over all of that.
Tear gas + pepper spray to the face
Getting tear-gassed during a riot in Turkey is something I never expected to experience, nor do I ever wish to experience it again.