I read cars as cats. 
You’ve given me an idea on how to maximize the amount of cream I get out of tubes when compounding now. Thanks! 
My mini mental break? I read something brain related, be it a textbook, article, or scientific paper on neurology, addiction medicine, psychopharmacology, etc. Even if I never fully understand the human (or mouse) brain, every tiny little bit of new info makes me feel like I’m just a little step closer to understanding my own mental reactions to circumstances and stress.
I’m in Bangkok. I don’t think you want to know.
I quit arguing with those other voices in my head and just sit back and do as I’m told.
I’m self employed and don’t take many breaks, but there’s a pub right next door! 
I should add that another useful step is running the tube under hot water for a bit before beginning. Helps soften up everything and prep it for the hammering. Not required, but it makes the job a bit easier.
As for the tube-compressing clips: those would take away all my fun!
My stethescope needs oiling too, but that’s a once every year or two sort of event. Even so, a nice diversion.
Be sure to let us know when you oil up your stethoscope** again. We’ll run around throwing confetti and blowing on those little New Year’s Eve noisemakers for your big event.
** I guess that’s what the cool kids are calling it these days. 
That’s what the Musical Anoscope of my earlier post is for.
Ever consider the fine art of lube winging?
Behold! You will get every single last drop now
Paperwork. When I start getting wound too tight over what ever project I’m working on at the moment, I fill out forms, and complete logs, and file records, and send out notifications.
Most people hate paperwork, but I find it soothing; it’s so concrete.
Several years ago I became somewhat obsessed with the lubrication potential of snail slime. What facinated me about it so much was that it could dry up and by simply wetting with a small amount of water it could be instantly reactivated, very non messy and non staining as well. I thought it might have some medical uses as well as the obvious sexual uses. A micro thin film can provide a very effective lubricant action. Harvesting the slime became my biggest challenge.
You’re in luck. The first GOP debates are just around the corner.
Turns any anus into a cow bell.
Mine only works once a month. We have no lube or slime, here, but we do have fire extinguishers and they do need to be inspected once a month. It’s a short walk with a pen.
I’ve never seen one that wasn’t just fine, but I’ve been told that if OSHA visits the fine is $500 each for every extinguisher with a tag that isn’t up to date. So I’m saving us $500 x 5 extinguishers x the odds of being inspected. Assuming a one in a million chance, that’s a quarter of a cent each month. I’ve been doing it for about ten years, so I’ve saved over thirty cents.
Pretty much this.
I’m picturing him wearing an apron and goggles, hammering tubes of lube with a small maul, laughing like a maniac with punk rock blaring in the background.
Why don’t you just shove the little tubes up your patients’ asses and squeeze them empty? I for one don’t want to share someone else’s sloppy seconds lube.
Pretty close, but Pink Floyd would be blaring in the background. Or the soundtrack from “Rocky Horror Picture Show”. And it’s a surgical gown, not an apron. 
I wouldn’t worry.
After a couple of loud and unexpected anvil hammer-to-anvil bangs coming from behind the open end of the patient’s examination robe, I’m betting everything will close & clench right up. :eek:
What’s the process for nominating **Shodan **to the SMDB Poet Laureate post? 