Use Caution When Opening Women

That’s what the sign says!

I went to the company technical library the other day and on the restroom door across the hall it has these two signs juxtaposed: “Use Caution When Opening” and “Women”. At first I thought it was just a coincidence but there is an additional sign below these, spaced well away from them, that reads “Caution: Open Door Slowly”. And there aren’t any additional signs on the mens room door except “Men”. Corporate humor? Or safety information gone awry?

Other mundanities:

The morning guy on the radio played Bob Dylan singing “Mr. Tambourine Man” and then said that many songwriters were not the best performers of their songs and other singers who covered them did a better job than the original. (I know, we’ve had this thread.) But then he played William Shatner’s version. I had heard Shatner did an album and that it was bad, but until this day I didn’t know how bad it was.

Speaking of radio, I had to give my dad a ride last night and I got to sit in the car and wait for 45 minutes or so. I flipped the radio back and forth from a political talk radio show to Art Bell’s “Ghost to Ghost” – a special edition of his “Coast to Coast” show. One of the shows had a lot of gullible people calling in and talking about stuff that would be really scary if it were true but they were obviously self-deluded and would believe anything! The other was about ghosts.

“And comb London’s teeming millions for him? Had we but world enough and time.”
Dorothy L. Sayers
Murder Must Advertise

My hometown of Belen, New Mexico, is home to a desiccant factory. You know, those little packets of silica gel they put in toolboxes and things to absorb moisture? They make those. Anyway, as you know, they aren’t exactly one of the four major food groups, so they have a warning for the kiddies not to eat them. They also have the location of the factory printed on them. The result is, you guessed it:

DO NOT EAT Belen, New Mexico

Sound advice.


Modest? You bet I’m modest! I am the queen of modesty!

Hmmm. It could be corporate humor, but I doubt it. Most corporate humor is entirely unintentional–a fact that Scott Adams is slowly beating into the ground.
One of my favorites in “sign serendipity” was two billboards, right next to each other. The first was for a “hot rock” (yeah, right) station, showing a woman’s torso, prominently endowed with a truly amazing set of gazongas. The logo was “what a pair”, w/ the names of their 2 morning DJ’s.
Right next to it was one of the Clio winning, “Got milk?” ads.
I nearly drove off the interstate, laughing.
Veb

Years ago I used to be a neon sign repairman. One morning I got a call to repair two signs in Guelph, Ontario.

My first call was to a Chinese restaurant. I had to replace the burned out X in “Exotic Chinese Food”. My second call was to replace the R in “Agnew Surpass Shoes.”

Yeah, I screwed up. When I left,the town of Guelph had two new signs:

Erotic Chinese Food.
Agnew Suxpass Shoes.

I got fired.


This space for rent.

We have a sign on a door in Pacific Grove, California not far from the Candid Camera office, it says: Police, close door to shut off alarm.

is there really a Candid Camera office?
Do they still make that show?
Was it in your town were all the stuff happened? or did they just go to all different towns.

pat

One place I worked had magnetic locks on the stairwell doors, and a there was a sign that said “In case of fire, door will automatically unlock”. For some strange reason I took exception to this. One day I copied the thing and did a cut and paste (literally), changing it to “In case of door, unlock will automatically fire” and put it back. The funny part was that it took almost two weeks before anybody noticed …

I-5 south of Tacoma bears an exit sign with the following metaphysical conundrum:

Exit 152
Fort Lewis
No. Fort Lewis


“It ain’t no sin to be glad you’re alive”
Bruce Springsteen

I once saw these two signs juxtaposed (actually, the lower sign was superimposed over the sign for a now-vacant store):
DONUTS
FOR RENT
Ye gods! You mean there are still people so poor they have to rent food??!


“If you drive an automobile, please drive carefully–because I walk in my sleep.”–Victor Borge

Cool. Here’s a thread that I can use. There’s a sign on a local Dunkin’ Donuts (plot point) that says “No Loitering. Police take note.” There are two interpretations of the meaning of this sign, but at the risk of sounding like an idiot, I honestly have no idea which is accurate! Help!


meredith
“Everybody needs underwear!”-Rob Petrie

I was driving on I90, when I saw the big neon sign for Big Lots (a glorified dollar store) in which the “L” was missing. Would YOU shop there??

My favorite is a convience store off I10 near Van Horn Texas. A large sign on the side of the store offers “Diesel Fried Chicken”.

Traveling on the Nimitz Freeway through Hayward, one sees this sign identifying an offramp:

A Street
Downtown

and one wonders, tongue-in-cheekily, if they couldn’t have been a little more specific.

On the opposite side of Interstate 81 leading south out of Syracuse, New York, there used to be a sign reading “WRONG WAY. GO BACK.” It always made me think of that scene in Invasion of the Body Snatchers where Kevin McCarthy is standing in the middle of the freeway yelling, “Go back! They’re here! You’re next!!!”

“Slow Children at Play” street signs.

'nuff said.

At the Home Depot in Danvers, MA.

On the inside of the Men’s Room door,
it has a diagram labeled “Emergency Evacuation Instructions”.

I think they’re carrying those “How To” seminars a bit too far…

Do I even need to mention those school zone signs with the flashing warning lights? The ones that say “Slow for children when flashing”?


Modest? You bet I’m modest! I am the queen of modesty!

NTG wins today’s Serendipitous Juxtaposition of Post and .Sig Line for the contribution just above! :slight_smile:

pricciar, yes, Candid Camera is located at 650 Lighthouse St.110. They do NOT post a sign to that effect. I dont know what happened to the show. If you see a skit & they don’t say what city it is in, then its done in Monterey County [usually PG or Monterey].

I saw the woman again who works for them at dinner yesterday & I said, ‘You’re on candid Camera???’ She kinda took flight. But I always say that when I see her.

There’s a Good Year tire store near me that has two letters burnt out- At night it reads “Goo ear”. Not a juxposition and not really hilarious but it made me laugh.