Useless Tools?

Okay, being a guy, I know there isn’t any such thing as a “useless tool” but looking through mine today, I realized the following:

I have a Reciprocal saw (bought becuase it was on sale) used ONCE to cut up some plywood.

A circular saw (also bought on sale) used ONCE to cut up a two by four.

A 14 foot long branch lopper I bought to get a dead limn out of a tree that was hanging over my car.

A complete set of keyhole saws and a complete set of wood bore bits I bought, well, because I was bored one day.

Every wrench and socket I’ve ever owned as well as about a hundred screwdrivers.

Out of all this mess, I use three different screwdrivers and a hammer. If I ever need to build a car, I’ll probably be able to as I still have all the damn air tools I bought when I was a machine builder. No compressor though.

Yeah, I know, I’m anal about tools…

Anyways, anyone else have a bunch of tools that they bought thinking it would be used all the time and now sit around collecting dust?

Do tools from previous employment count? If so:

  1. 28ft extention ladder with cable hooks.
  2. Safety belt and lanyard
  3. Hi Opal!
  4. Hard hat
  5. Orange pylons (3)
  6. Orange flashing light to stick on truck while climbing above listed ladder.
  7. 100ft fish tape
  8. Various cable end crimpers (O.K. I use one of them at my new job)
  9. Terminator tool (O.K. I also used this once) (Insert Arnold Schwarzenheger joke here)
  10. Security colar wrenches

I used to install cable modems. Many times the customer was also getting their cable re-connected or additional tiers which required hauling out that f***ing ladder.

Hey! ALL tools ALWAYS count!

circular saw, used once.

four drills… why in the hell do I have four drills???

A tool chest full of every socket and wrench made EXCEPT the three american and four metric ones that I need to work on my cars.

A variety of spanner wrenches… I have no idea how or why I have them or what they could possibly be used for.

Every size pipe wrench made, but I know nothing about plumbing.

I have four packages of scrollsaw blades…yet have never owned a scrollsaw… ???

Welding gloves and clamps… No, I don’t have a welder.

Tools that I have no idea what they are even called anymore, but I know I bought em cuz they looked incredibly cool at the time I was in the hardware store.

Until last year, I had a three foot long caliper micrometer… why in HELL would anyone have one of those?

Useless tool?

fatherjohn. No question about it.

Oh yeah, add Omniscient to that list, too. :smiley:

Would “Cow Tools” count?

When I was in the Navy for the first few years I’d be at the bottom of the pile when it came to maintenance department.

This means that whenever you were working with someone more senior you had to do all the gophering and that generaly meant my tools got used on the job in hand, so my tools were the ones most likely to go missing.

If you lose a tool you pay for it.

My way around this was to fill up my toolbag with specialist one job only tools, odd size spanners such as 53/54ths, all the knackered screwdrivers I could lay hands on and anything unwieldy.I kept all my accountable tools well out of reach.

This had three useful effects, one I lost no tolls at all so it saved me money, two instead of being a gopher it menat that my superiors had to fetch their own tools, three after a while they stopped taking me on jobs so I got to goof off a whole lot more.

You had time to goof off, rather than persue the elusive long handled, high tension, self-ratcheting, chrome plated, knurled chain stretcher? Saints preserve us all.

When my husband pulled out his air compressor to remove the nuts off the tires on our car, I knew he had too many useless tools. I mean how hard is it to remove nuts off your tires? I did 3 nuts before he finished his first.

He buys at least one new tool every time he works on the car.

I have over 50 lbs of tools in the trunk of my car “in case we need it.”

The only useless tools to me are the ones I don’t have.

Friend: Hey I just brought an angle grinder

Me: Great. So what are you going to use it for?

Friend: Nothing. But hey it was realy cheap.

I’ve never used a socket set ever. I probably never will. Yet I have many of them (hey, they come in all the kits)

Another useless tool: Epilady. Like I need another thing sitting in a cupboard not being used… (and I’m sure as HELL not gonna USE it!!!)

oh and one more thing. What is up with tools that smell like barf? Usually it’s screwdrivers… apparently it’s the type of plastic or something but my GOD why don’t they change it?!?

Dunno about the barf smell…

I did go to the hardware store a couple days ago and bought a deluxe foot operated tire pump. It’ll probably never get used either.

I have a floor lifter (for computer room raised floors).

Never used it myself. I intend to use it to open unlocked doors that have no ouside handles. (movie theaters sometimes have these)

A large basin wrench. That’s the only tool I don’t use on an annoyingly regular basis.

Bloody house…

I hear you on the puke smelling tools Opal. I bought a set of screwdrivers in a vinyl bag and can’t even bear to open the bag anymore, it smells like someone ralphed in the bag! I’m sure your right, its gotta be the plastic they use for the handles, but geez do they have use puke-smelling plastic for em?

Metronome. Mom bought it four me 20 years ago when I was taking piano lessons, and threatened me if anything ever happened to it. I never used it then, and I still don’t. But it sits on the piano, just in case I might ever want a very regular clicking sound in the background.

Does software count? I’ve got tons of very expensive software I don’t know how to use. But I keep buying it 'cause it’s cool. (Thank goodness I control the office software budget…)

Then there’s my little eight-ounce hammer, which is far from useless, but my husband laughed derisively at it the first time he saw it. He remarked about how useless it is, compared to his big, manly hammers. Now he uses it all the time. Still makes fun of it, though.

I have a FOUR ounce jewelers hammer that I use a lot…then again I also have a set of 6 insulated screwdrivers for working on high powered electrical lines. They looked cool so I bought 'em.

Well, I have a tiny, tiny little .5 Torx with a hugeamous round bulb on the end with a shaft coming out the other end with a tiny .5 Torx hole in it, that’s used to change the chip in the distributor cap for a Ford 87 1.9L EFI engine, I used it once, it cost me $20 or so… :rolleyes:

I’ve got probably five different brake caliper drivers for my cars, use them once every three years to do a brake job, and I’ve got a O2 sensor socket that cost probably $10, and you know how often O2 sensors go out… :rolleyes: