Today during dinner with friends, we were eating at a restaurant.
The waiter forgot to give us knives and forks so I asked for some ‘utensils’.
My friend corrected me and said it should be cutlery and I had used the wrong word.
I googled but could not find any concrete clarification btw the two words.
Anyone can help me out?
Very broadly, utensils are used to produce the food while cutlery is used to eat the food.
Lots of overlap and cross-use, though.
Flatware is more specific for eating tools.
Completely disagree with running coach here.
Utensils is the broader grouping and includes all of the Western (usually metal) forks/spoons/knives and things like wooden chopsticks, tongs, skewers, spatulas, nutcrackers, and others.
Cutlery is the specific sub-grouping of Western set of eating utensils: the fork/spoon/knife set.
“Utensils” was just fine and a friend who feels the need to “correct” its use is one who would annoy me.
Despite my great love of language, and my passion for using the most accurate words and phrases to say things, I also know that language and word meanings are the single MOST democratically determined parts of human life that there is.
Words mean whatever the most people think they mean.
Simple test for your friend: did the wait staff understand you, and bring you what you wanted? Then you used the right words for that person. Had the waiter returned with a giant soup ladle, a meat cutting machine and salad tongs, then your friend would have “won” the chastisement.
I had the same thing happen yesterday and asked for some “silverware”. Mind you, I probably have never used any actual cutlery made of silver, but that is what we call it at home. All of our silver ware is stainless steel.
If you ask a British machinist for “silver steel”, you get what we call “tool steel”.
Dennis
I don’t think it can always be a question of “right”/“wrong.” A waiter would know not to bring cooking instruments regardless, because of the context. We often use context to understand words that otherwise wouldn’t be clear to us. Usually people ask for clarification, but not always.
The diner might have said, “Could you bring us some tools,” and with her hands made the motion of using a knife and fork. The waiter might be busy enough not to bother asking for clarification, and to just bring silverware, because that is 95% likely to be what the person wants, especially if the waiter notes that that is what’s missing from the table setting.
I did a google image search on the word “utensils.” The second image that came up was of a fork, knife and two spoons. Most of the pictures were of kitchen tools, but pictures of flatware were pretty common.
Oddly, all of the pictures that came up had to do with food. Just about any type of tool can be a utensil—a pen is a writing utensil and a rake is a gardening utensil—but google images thinks it’s a food word.
The fact that the wait staff understood does not mean that the OP used the correct words “for that person”. There’s a difference between being “correct” and making yourself understood. For example , in North American English, “bathroom” and “restroom” have apparently become synonymous ( although they didn’t used to be). This is not the case in every language- but if I ask for the “bathroom” in a restaurant in a non-English speaking country , the staff will not tell me there is none. They will direct me to the “restroom”.
I agree completely. I don’t think I have ever used “cutlery” in my life, although I understand it, sort of (I would have guessed it meant more specifically knives). I would have asked for “silverware” even if I expected only stainless. But that’s what I always call it.
I remember getting into such a discussion with a mathematical acquaintance and I told him that usage (or grammar) is determined by the majority. He asked me if a majority decided that the derivative of x^2 was 3x, that would make it correct. That was a fatuous comment and I told him so.
I’ve always heard cutlery when referring to knife sets. Wustof cutlery sets, Chicago Cutlery, wooden cutlery block.
I don’t know what thread you’re responding to, but in this thread the parties involved are speaking the same language.
I was way off the mark on this one. I’ve always used silverware to refer to knives, forks, and spoons. I was also aware of the term eating utensils but I never used it. As for cutlery, I always thought it specifically referred to knives. I never realized forks and spoons were cutlery until recently. If you had asked me what a cutlery set was, I would have said this not this.
I can help you out. Your friend is a douchebag.
A friend of mine likes to refer to them as “eatin’ irons” (by analogy to "shootin’ irons). 
The point I was making ( apparently badly ) is that just because I am able to make myself understood doesn’t mean I am using the correct word. But for an English-only example, let’s say you are at my house for dinner and there are disposable plastic cups on the table. If you ask me to pour you a “glass of soda” , the fact that my response is to pour some soda into a disposable plastic cup does not mean that “glass” is a correct word for a disposable plastic cup.
I, too, would have thought that “cutlery” was only knives. Spoons would be scooplery.
I dunno if they will know what restroom means either. It is an American coinage, and people don’t rest there.
Outside 1990’s sitcoms. It was a dear and valued joke that men’s restrooms were inferior to ladies.
Plus women don’t make a mess there.
I was going to say that in this case the terms cutlery and utensils can be used interchangeably, where as the proper term for the friend is a “tool”.
Thanks everyone!
I just wanted to know whether i was not wrong.
