Count me as also baffled by this need to spread it single-molecule-layer thin. Well, not the need, but the technique required. Has anyone considered making a Vegemite/Marmite/Bovril atomizer so those of us not properly schooled in this ancient art can have a fair shot at enjoying the unique pleasures of these delicacies? I’m thinking you’d butter up your toast, then spray a fine mist of your tarry-substance of choice into the air before wafting the toast, butter-side up, through the falling droplets, thereby acheiving the perfect thickness of toast-enhancer…
I’ve never tried it mixed for a hot drink. are you sure you’re not confusing with Bovril? They come in the same shape, same sized jars and are of a similar strength.
A cup of Bovril has long been a half-time winter warmer at football grounds, particularly in the North of England. Another tasty spread on toast, to be treated the same as Marmite when it comes to quantity.
Mind you… I’ll have a go with a mug of Marmite.
Nope, absolutely not…I remember Bovril and Oxo* hot drinks, but also Marmite. As a wee 'un, my mum would do the Marmite broth when we came home from school. Being as how we’d just walked five miles uphill both ways in the snow tae and frae school with no shoes on, this being quite a long time ago. 
*Oxo was much, much better. Damn. I want some Oxo now.
Marmite is great in drink form, one teaspoon to a cup and boiling water. Simple and warming on a cold winters day.
I just googled Marmite broth and I am not alone.
Marmite broth -it Gives you Wings.
{Basil hat on}
Now That Is Bloody Typical…
People like you stuffing your half inch layer of peanut buttered sandwich into your fat face while lecturing us about the cooking methods of some Kraut TV chef.
If you don’t like it, sod off to The Fat Duck…
{Basil hat off}
{Sybil hat on}
I’ll deal with this, Basil…
(Sybil hat off}
Ah, I see you have been consulting Samuel Johnson’s guide to serving cucumber
No, no, you misunderstand me. I’m not lecturing anyone about anything. I’m rather impressed, honestly, because I just can’t pull that off. Give me “half a fingernail” sized amount of most anything and the best I’m going to do is a fairly thin smudge on one corner of the piece of bread. I’d think this has something to do with physics and adhesion and science and stuff, but obviously not, because folks in quite a few former British possessions manage it. Is a sonic screwdriver involved somehow?
(Also, who’s Basil, Sybil, “some Kraut TV chef”, and the “Fat Duck”? o.O Oh, and half inch… hm. Probably that’s a bit much for a PB&J, but I’m not sure–haven’t made one recently. Proportions are more important than absolute amounts.)
LawMonkey, I can’t explain the physics of it so you’ll just have to try for yourself.
Make toast.
Spread it with butter (the real thing, not some margarine/I can’t Believe It’s not Butter! abomination.)
Put a teensy dab of Marmite/Vegemite on your butter knife and spread it thinly across the buttered toast. It will take a couple of passes, then you’re good to go.
You’re overthinking instead of doing. Trust me. It works.
Right then (rolls up sleeves)…
White bread, thinnest smear of marmite, thinly sliced cucumber, crusts off, cut into fingers, cup of Earl or Lady Grey.
If you want to go full English, have it bought to you in the rose garden by Stephen Fry playing Jeeves.
I suspect it works by redistributing the butter. You see, without the butter, the [del]marmot[/del] marmite has to adhere to bread bits, which is very course and soaks up stuff. So you can’t spread very much, because the bread is grabby. But if you put a coating of butter across the bread, the butter fills in all the bread voids and makes a layer of slippery stuff. Then as you glide the marmite/vegemite across the surface, you redistribute the butter as necessary to get the brown goo pasted around.
And if someone wished to improve the thing, maybe someone should market a marmite/vegemite starter kit, i.e. a butter that is infused with the lightest dab of stuff already. Thus there is no precarious mixing and trying for the right ratio, but rather a pre-balanced flavor set.
Not that I’d eat it. 
I’m surprised nobody’s mentioned this, the best way to hook an American on Marmite is to offer it at breakfast as a hangover cure.
All those lovely B vitamins…
Source: that’s how I was hooked.
Hmmm. Maybe I’ll try it again this weekend–there’s a corner grocery that stocks various English things and there’s definitely some Marmite behind the counter. I’m a sporting fellow, and I’ve come 'round to things I didn’t like on the first try before–scotch comes immediately to mind…
ETA: Also, Irishman, let’s not forget that keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, within the city–that ain’t legal either.
Just to be really confusing, there’s more than one type of Marmite. Or there will be, when they start making it in New Zealand again. Any day now… 
Seriously though, New Zealand Marmite is different to English Marmite, having considerably less “bite”, but it’s also less “yeasty” than Vegemite.
From a taste profile perspective Promite is sort of-kind of similar (ish).
If you’re not sure whether someone is from Australia or New Zealand (although the accents sound totally different to us, no-one else seems to be able to tell them apart), ask if they prefer Marmite or Vegemite. Anyone who says Marmite is from New Zealand. 
Oh yes indeed. There’s an extra strong Marmite XO, and a limited edition Marmite Gold that has flecks of gold food colouring.
Not tried either, but I imagine the Marmite XO is not for the faint of heart.
You’ve never seen 'Fawlty Towers?
If not, watch it…
Heston Blumenthal owns the three Michelin starred Fat Duck restaurant and does stuff like snail ice cream.
Not Marmite, Snail.
Spread The Word.