I realized that my previous post was completely off of the OP, and I’m sorry. This just illustrates why I don’t often post to the GD forum.
To address the actual subject of the thread, just let me say that I don’t feel that there is a deliberate war on the poor. I think a war usually means consciously attacking an enemy. I think that the worst part about being poor is not the deliberate attacks, although those hurt also, it’s the indifference, and the attitude that you deserve whatever you get if you don’t have the resources to defend against it. There is frequently a moral judgment attached to poverty in this country that I think is habitual and perhaps unjustified.
On the other hand, the attitude of abject victimhood on the part of the poor is just about as habitual and unjustified. I can understand the reasons why so many of the poor seem resigned to it: for example, if you go on AFDC, once you start working again, you will never get a tax return until you have paid back all the money that the government ever gave you. This is just one more contributor to what is already an uphill struggle. There’s so much you don’t learn about managing money when you grow up poor, so it’s hard to make a lasting change in your situation, even if you do get a couple of breaks. I’ve read that only 2% of the population ever transcends the income bracket they were born into. Chances are if you are born below poverty level, you will remain there. It seems to me that there must be reasons other than just a “lack of motivation” influencing these statistics. I think a major problem with poverty in this country is that so many people have unrealistically high expectations. They know they live in the richest country in the world. They see every day on TV how the wealthy live, and they also know how unlikely it is that they will ever reach that level. Some people figure why work that much harder to make such a small difference? Their lives are lived on a totally different scale: a beat up car or a less beat up car, not a beat up car, or, with a bit of hard work, a Mercedes. Why do you think that so many kids from poor neighborhoods get into dealing drugs? Because they don’t know any other way to “be like Mike.” It does take a lot of motivation to struggle to break out of that environment, and then to deal with the emotional hardship of learning a whole new way of life outside of all the guideposts you have ever known, all for the goal of a career that will bring in about $30,000/yr. It’s hard to be that far-sighted when up until that point, as a survival mechanism, you’ve been living moment-to-moment and paycheck-to-paycheck.
Jeff_42 - I have said repeatedly that I am not trying to defend the woman’s actions, just give you some insight into why someone might make a frivolous rather than survival-oriented choice. You’ll get no argument from me that the jacket and shoes were not the best way to spend the money, but as I said before, a person cannot function in survival mode all the time. Maybe she wanted to pretend for a moment she was like other moms that could buy such things for their children. Maybe logic was not her main motivating force at that time. Like the woman in the special Needs2Know watched, she knew that $100 wasn’t going to make that big of a difference, and that the jacket would make her son happy. I just want you to acknowledge that these are people, people whose every waking moment is not consumed with the life-eclipsing goal of getting off welfare. They are also mothers, friends, neighbors, people who want to participate in life, who want to be happy, and like most human beings, can’t deny themselves every scrap of human emotion just because they are poor. Maybe the woman was not very motivated to get off of welfare, or maybe she was a person determined to better her life, who made an exception just that once, to do something that would normally be outside her reach. Either way, who are you to judge her? Why always assume the worst about people?
Like Needs2Know said, maybe you have to have been there to understand, and not resent people spending your hard-earned money on things that their kids don’t actually need. Who are they to dress above their station, anyway? While we’re deciding what they should and should not buy, maybe we should make them sew gold stars on all their inexpensive yet fashionable clothes, so we know which ones are on welfare, and give them plastic cards or coupons for rent and clothing, too, instead of checks, so that they can only purchase the things on the government-approved list. Maybe they should be even further dehumanized, so that they won’t for a moment forget that they are on welfare, and must not do anything that does not further them down the path to non-dependence on your tax dollars.
I don’t think that staying on welfare, having more babies that you can’t support, and bilking the system is right. I think it’s dead wrong. But I find your attitude of self-righteous judgment on a life you have no frame of reference for equally incomprehensible, unsupportable, and upsetting.