Three times I’ve been to the john today (yeah, I had to piss three times in three hours-- what is it to you?) and each time there was a stench so strong it seeped out into the hallway and polished the glass doors in our reception area.
Why couldn’t it have been asparagus?
I hope you’re not ranting against my favorite vegetable.
Mmmmmm…collard greens (with turkey neck bones)!
Nah, no rants against collard greens (with bacon). The third time I walked out into the hallway and was knocked back 6 yards by the smell, I was reminded of a Richard Pryor routine about a voodoo lady with a monkey paw. The last line went something like: “. . .and when that collard green eatin’ bitch went to the outhouse. . …”
Sorry, it wasn’t the collards, it was the sauerkraut on the chilodogs.
Well, we didn’t eat collard greens in my house last night, so I’m blame-free. 
Are you sure youre going into the right restroom? I thought womens shit didnt stink........... Well, thats what they tell me.
By the way, I loved your description of the stench (polished the glass doors, HA) !
If it was Christmastime in Hollis, Queens, the answer to your question is yes.
Collard greens and cornbread, mmm,mmm, good!
My collard green memory…
Once I was having hellish menstrual cramps and I was suffering from nausea. Oh yes, it was New Years Eve and I had just finished stuffing myself with collard greens and macaroni cheese.
The force of my vomit was so powerful that collard greens came out of my nose! And they were still leafy! The grossness of this fact made me vomit more and more.
But I still love me some cahluds, yes indeedy.