Ah, good for you, then.
There was an episode of the Simpsons where Bart gets a credit card in the dog’s name.
I do like catalogues though-I get tons of them-I’m a complete and utter catalogue whore. Franklin Mint, Victorian Trading Company, Sovietski Collection, Barbie Collectibles-things like that.
I remember Santos L. Halper! Maybe he can get a credit card where I could not. If I could just drum up a SSN for him, I’d be in business. Or jail.
Do you get Museum Replicas Limited?
A coworker brings them in for me. Pretty cool. http://www.museumreplicas.com
The only thing Franklin Mint hooked me with was the 3D Star Trek Chess Set, which I’ve wanted for 30 years. Why, oh why couldn’t it have been made by someone who WOULDN’T charge an arm and a leg for it? Alas.
I like the dolls (I have Rose, the Titanic Vinyl Portrait Doll), and the Faberge stuff. And the royalty stuff, too.
Is Museum Replicas’ catalog free? I only order free catalogs?
If you guys aren’t getting the replica sword and RenFaire-kinda clothes catalogs, you’re missing out.
Well, they’re free to me, but that’s not much help, is it? According to this page, you can get one for $3.00, which is refundable with your first purchase. Inside the one I’ve got here (which has a $3.00 cover price, I just noticed), there’s a number to call and get on their mailing list (1-800-883-8838), but it mentions doing that if you want to continue receiving the catalogues (sounds like they’re free after you’ve become a paying customer).
Looks like you’d probably have to plunk down a couple of bucks to get one…unless you want me to send you one of my old ones to check out. I’ve got three or four of them I think. They’re full color, about 75 pages.
What, don’t you get the “we’ll raise your limit by $1000 if you let us charge $39 on your card” letters? I get those about every 6 months, ignore them and call the company to have them raise it for free. I started off with Capital One on a $200 limit, secured by a $99 deposit in a savings account with some bank of their choosing. After a while of charging it up and paying it off every month they doubled me to $400 and a while after that they let me unsecure it and sent me back my $99 plus interest. Through an odd series of events they ended up raising my limit by $700 to a total of $1100 and they’ve raised it a few times since then per my request, but always with that extra $100 on the limit. I love it and will refuse any offer they make to even it off to an even multiple of $1000 because no one else I know has that bizarre extra $100 on their limit (and if you do I don’t want to hear about it!). Anyway, if you ever felt like you could handle another couple hundred on your limit I’m sure Capital One would be happy to accomodate you.
As for what you use those business reply envelopes for, how about stuffing the offer itself into the envelope (after tearing it up of course) and mailing it back, along with the rest of the stuff that came in the original envelope, and wht the hey, the original envelope too? It’s no worse than marking the original envelope “return to sender” so you’re hardly “abusing the mails,” right?
My brother’s dog once received a credit card with a $10,000 limit.
Brother and his housemates used the dog’s first name with by brother’s last name if they had to provide a name and address for something small that was likely to bring junk mail.
Well, the dog got the junk mail. After throwing it away, they decided to fill it out. They were as honest as they could be on it (I don’t know what they used for a SSN), and for a signature, used the dog’s pawprint. His job was something like “Master of Eating, drooling and pooping in the yard”.
They also canceled the card shortly after it was received - there was never any intent to use it to purchase anything, but to see if the company would realize that it at the time of application.
I get many items from Capital One in the mail. One day I got five at one time. I open, make sure there’s no personal information, run them through the shredder and recycle as much of the paper as I can.
Dijon Warlock:
"Initial Credit Standards"means: they purchased a list from the credit bureaus that don’t contain anything but your name and address, but is based on the criteria the bank supplied to the bureau. (IE - no charge offs, FICO scores, limits and balances, etc.) That’s where they get the “pre-approved” nonsense.
OR - you live in a zip code they like. (It’s amazing the different APR’s you’ll be offered depending on where you live.)
OR - you subscribe to magazines that tend to match the demographic they’re looking for.
OR - you receive catalogs in the mail that tend to match the demographic they’re looking for.
OR - you belong to organizations that match the demographic they’re looking for.
That’s why they can turn you down after they “pre-approve” you. They don’t have any credit info on you, just a bunch of mainly demographic data. They fling out the offers like buckshot to that group, and hope some of it sticks.
Here’s a good trick to play on junk mailers. I met someone who did it.
Fill in an application form for anything - Readers Digest prize draw, anything as long as it’s free and is an obvious attempt to obtain your address.
Be very careful to tick ALL the boxes and sign ALL the little statements emphasising that you don’t wish to receive any further mailings either from them or anyone else (especially from anyone else).
Now, here’s the clever bit: MISSPELL your name or address - Make Smith into Smithe or leave the H out of Johnson (assuming it had one). Make sure that everything else is correct, so there’s no doubt this came from you.
From now on, every time you get unsolicited mail with the misspelt name or address on it, you CAN PROVE that the company you originally posted the form to has sold your details against your wishes.
The next thing to do is kick up an almighty stink, send letters threatening to sue and report to the consumer protection authorities anyone who sends junkmail to your “marked” address. (And they will, believe me.)
Nine times out of ten these companies will send you FREE STUFF to try and shut you up. If you’ve got the time, energy and money, you could even follow up your threats and actually take the bastards to the cleaners, but IANAL and don’t know how feasible this would be…
Washers. The ones you use for bolts and such. They’re metal, harmless, and fit easily into most envelopes. If need be you can slip them between cardboard to keep 'em from bunching up in one corner of the envelope, too.
It’s not often that I actually do laugh out loud at things. I didn’t quite do so with this, but I chuckled and coughed at the same time so it almost sounded like I was laughing. That merits at least an 8 of 10.
My father, once upon a time, listed his dog, Natasha, as his business partner because NC needed at least two names to start up his consulting firm. She was 18, so it was technically legal, though definitely not under the spirit of the law. She eventually began to receive all sorts of mail- periodicals, magazines she had subscribed to (we even have her signature!), credit card offers. My father had a kind of a sense of humor to him, so once they sent a pre-approved photoID Mastercard Gold (10K limit), he gave them her pawprint as a signature and a color photocopy of an old picture of her (this was also the first time he’d had to mention her middle initial, which started showing up on everything).
They sent him the card, with the picture of a now-19 year old Lhasa Apso on it. Since she never charged anything to it, he used it at a supermarket once, when he wasn’t paying attention, paid it off that month, and thus she had a perfect credit history. He kept it until it expired, and they never figured out. She still occasionally gets offers, almost ten years and three moves later.
That wonderful system would be called “Chexsystems”. Due to a bank error, I was put on the system and denied a checking account for almost a year before I finally got the bank, through sheer perseverance, to admit their mistake. It took weeks of phone calls and meetings with bank managers.
From www.chexhelp.com:
In a way, it is a clever little ploy that removes those pesky, keep a small balance, customers from the system. If there is a bank error, for instance, that causes your account to become overdrawn and you don’t have enough funds in your account to cover the error until it is corrected, bye bye bank account. That is what happened to me. A friend is also on it for his soon-to-be divorced wife having a talent for bouncing checks.
All of the banks belong to this system, so once you are on it, nobody will give you an account. Kinda scary.
I have had the EXACT experience with Capital One. I would get 2-3 offers per week from them. Finally I broke down and applied. You guessed, turned down due to lack of credit history. I was fuming.
Then I got the “You are already approved, just go to the website” letter. I go to the website, turned down again! Now I’m getting really mad because these refusals are making my credit worse!! And I’m still getting 2-3 offers per week from them.
2 months later I get the “OK, you are really really approved, no fooling this time” offer and I apply again and they actually give me the card! I am happy, because although I don’t plan to use the card all that much, at least I will stop getting all of this junk mail. Guess what? I’ve had the Capital One card for 3 months now and I STILL get offers to apply for their card!
Now I hear these horror stories of bogus late fees. I can’t wait to go through that hell.
I get a lot of crap and sometimes they thoughtfully supply an envelope with a mail indicia. This means that they pay for the postage for me to send them the application form.
So I find it therapeutic to waste their 40 cents or whatever the hell 9th grade, slow as molasses in winter postage rates are by sending them back a ripped up form.
According to this, the post office will stop these things for you.
I don’t think you owe the clerk at the local post office an explanation as to why you find credit card offers sexually inappropriate. If you must, you could mention that “…every time I got another one of those, it made me want to find whoever sent it to me and shove it up their…”
