There’s a good bit in the December Harper’s readings on British business-speak for Americans.
Including:
What they say: With greatest respect…
What you understand: He’s listening to me.
What they mean: I think you are wrong or a fool.
WTS: I was a bit disappointed that…
WYU: It doesn’t really matter.
WTM: I am most upset and cross.
WTS: Very interesting.
WYU: He is impressed.
WTM: I don’t agree or I don’t believe you.
and
WTS: Quite good.
WYU: Quite good.
WTM: A bit dissappointing.
Yes! Betenoir, that is a good summary of some of the more important points. I have never seen the concept of damning with faint praise perfected to the degree the English have. Definitely disturbing for those of us who consider themselves relatively fluent in English.
I sat through a cultural training session where the concept of ‘high content’ and ‘low content’ culture was explained. I am unfortunately a ‘low content’ sort of guy. I will take you for your word. I lack the skills to thrive in an English business environment. In terms of rank-ordering the cultures I have lived in, UK is the most ‘high content’, then the Netherlands, then the US as relatively low content and finally Israel which is one of the lowest content cultures in the world. If they say they are going to bomb your nuclear plant, they mean it.
The other stereotypical high content culture is Japan. What is it with these Island nations that makes them so much more indirect in terms of communication?
The other stereotypical high content culture is Japan. What is it with these Island nations that makes them so much more indirect in terms of communication?
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Me too! In fact, I apparently bollocksed up the little business I tried to transact over there (I was informed after the fact) because when I asked what I could do to move the project along I took “Oh, no, nothing you need to worry about right now” to mean…“Oh, no, nothing you need to worry about right now”. :smack: Silly me.
And yes, the other thing I thought was some day I might get the hang of the English, but lord, I am never moving to Japan.
When I was in Germany, on top of new homes as they were being built they put a tree bedecked by ribbons.
for Chinese, it is tradition to give a Hong Bao (red packet filled with a varied amount of money; usually more than the cost of the person’s meal, gauged only with the name of the restaurant as an indication) to the wedding couple during their dinner feast. this is practical if you wish to hold a worthy feast for the occasion.
tips in restaurants. tips? isn’t that like bribery? how much are you expected to give? will they spit in your food the next time you visit if you don’t tip enough? :eek:
Sounds like I’m gonna need to double check with my friend as far as that story of his went. it’s been a few years since he told me about it.
Maybe that’s why we have so many choices. The two brands you describe as available in the Netherlands can’t do the job effectively. More choices, better product. We have soft stuff that DOES clean you completely, and it’s fairly cheap. If it doesn’t work, you can grab another brand. Competition…it’s a wonderful thing.
I really wish the British did this. We all (17 year old teenagers) bring £20 notes and give them all to the waiter and he gives one back and we have to painstakingly work out if everyone’s got the right change…such a pain in the arse.
Hahaha, yes, the Belgians were best for this.
German toilets with shelves…just…no.
Americans eat faster than anyone else, in my observational experience. They seem to treat a meal like an unpleasant task to get out of the way as fast as possible. Seeing whole families get through four courses and out in under an hour is my nomination for Weird Customs in Foreign Countries. The waiter probably couldn’t believe you were ready to go already.
Restaurants are excluded from minimum wage laws, so servers are often paid obscenely low wages (like $2.50/hr). It’s expected that tips will make up the rest of their salary. Twenty percent is a standard tip, more if they did a great job, less if they did a lousy job.
And yes, they might spit in your food if you didn’t tip last time! If you’re a good tipper and a regular customer somewhere, you can usually expect better than average service.
Ha! I do this all the time. You don’t need to say anything to go along with it, but in Israel, the word that goes along with the gesture is “rega” (a second).
I like this “high content”/“low content” concept. And yeah, Israelis have pretty much no content.
Oh wow, I thought Kitty Party was just a bad show on this godawful channel my mom watches called zed-tv or something. Thank you for clearing up the mystery of that Aanamika + gouda b/c so many of my friends and I are like “wtf is up with that Kitty Party show on the Indian channel?”
About tipping in the US… it’s a long standing custom. Normal tips are 15-20%. If service is bad, though, you are allowed to reduce the amount of the tip (on the rare occassion I have left NO tip I have asked to speak to the manager and made it clear WHY there was no tip)
It is also customary to tip food that is delivered to your door. If the weather is bad, you should tip more than usual since the poor delivery person is the one out in the pouring rain, stifling heat, or howling blizzard.
There are a couple restaurants where I am a regular - I eat there once a week on average. I tip generously, and I am treated like royalty. The servers exert an extra effort to please me, and I feel that should be rewarded. I’ll tip up to 25% there, more on a holiday if they’re working.
I should also mention that one of those restuarants was a place I once left no tip whatsoever - a new server decided she didn’t like my companion and me and treated us badly- spilled water on us, then never got anything to clean up, made rude comments about our food choices, s-l-o-w service, and halfway through our stay apparently decided to ignore us completely. I mean we hadn’t got our food yet and when I tried stop her and ask her about it she shot back with something like “sit down - I’ll talk to you when I’m ready and not sooner”. Unbelievable! It was the other servers who took over, helped us clean up the spilled mess, got us our drinks and food, and so forth. So I told the manger how horrible this new server was - and also put in a good word for the other servers who had spontaneously pitched in and tried to cover for this lazy [expletive deleted] and should be praised for trying to salvage a messy situation.
Anyhow, a good waiter/server can make a lot in tips - the system can reward exceptional service when it works the way it’s supposed to do so.
Lots of people in a small space - you can’t get away from the neighbors, so you have to come up with a way of reducing friction between them. Going “RARRRR! I will beat your skull in!” might work where combatants can retreat from each other when one party or the other has had enough, but if both are locked in the same room, so to speak, the carnage can quickly get out of hand, damage bystanders, etc.
I have occassion to speak/e-mail/meet folks from other countries as part of my job. Have to be very careful, remember that just because their English is good does not mean they are conversant with American corporate culture. For that matter, there are significant differences between East Coast, Midwest, and West Coast business cultures here in the US. Also have to be careful to avoid slang and colloquilisms when communicating, which can be surprisingly difficult at times.
Then we have Fun with Time Zones… And on two occassions we’ve had foreign visitors ask to make their visit during US holidays (Thanksgiving week and July 4th) which puzzled many of my American co-workers but really, why would someone in Sweden know that on the third Thursday in November practically the entire US takes the day off work?
I cannot see this emphasized enough.
You may consider it a stupid system. But for waitstaff, it’s the system that’s in place. It’s how they get paid. If you don’t tip you’re asking them to work for you for free. If they do their job badly, feel free to pay them less (one of the advantages of the tipping system) but don’t refuse to pay them if they’ve done the work.
This is a great thread. Are there any Danish dopers?
I’m not sure if this is really a Danish custom, or just my (ex)mother in law’s ex-patriot thing, but she puts Danish flags on EVERYTHING.
Danish flag stickers on envelopes. Danish flag stickers inside the birthday card all around the signatures. Danish flag toothpick things on birthday cakes. She wanted them on my wedding cake, but we opted for a more Canadian style wedding cake and left the flags off. Danish flag garland and decorations on her Christmas tree. Danish flag cocktail napkins at our engagement party. Actually Danish flag cocktail napkins for all occasions that don’t require her good linen.
I actually like my ex mom-in-law, (sort of…well enough anyway) but I get it, you’re Danish. My ex husband (who grew up in Canada) never had a birthday cake without flags. She says everyone in Denmark does it. My husband’s niece is half Danish now and part Irish, kind of four generations back or something. This little girl gets Danish and Irish flags on her birthday cake now.
Again, I know expats kind of go nuts over the whole “back in the old country” thing. But is this really a Danish custom, or just my mother in law? Someday my son is going to get a birthday cake full of paper flag toothpicks, and I am curious to know.
<bump, cuz curious minds want to know>
So have you accepted cod into your life yet?
I can’t way to see how she misspellls this one.
Here in the Netherlands they have a strange custom on birthdays. The guests not only congratulate the birthday boy or girl, but also his parents, and other family members.
The tree is put up right after the last roof beam has been placed. This is the sign that the “Richtfest” will start. The “Richtfest” is a party held in the partially finished house, for all the people who helped build it. It ususally includes the consumption of large amounts of beer and “Wuerstchen” and “Sauerkraut”.
Only an expat but I’ve been over here a few years now. Certainly true, when the birthdays come around at the office there will be Danish flags stuck to your office door or draped across the corridor outside your office. You can also buy a whole host of different flags in the supermarkets, flags, flags and more flags, including the cocktail stick variety you mentioned for birthday cakes (although I don’t know about wedding cakes).
grey_ideas
Someone has told you their wedding plans rather then a general custom. I might add that the person with the wedding plans is a tight arse.
Years ago I was a barmaid in England. I did this face :eek: when I found out I had to pull pints on Christmas day. I did love the community spirit in Pommy pubs though (and it turned out to be a very cool Christmas day)
Israel had white butter. I found this hard to adjust to.
Tipping to supplement someones inadequate wage seems like society approved robbery to me. A very strange custom. Tips should be an unexpected reward for excellent service, not a way to pay the rent.
Toilets should be in a seperate room! How does one have an urgent pee when someone else is in the shower otherwise???
Beetroot is yummy on hamburgers. McDonalds agree and have provided McKiwi Burgers for years (of course McDonalds burgers are not the best place for beetroot).