Walking home from work today I saw at a bus stop on a bench were a 3/4 full container of Skippy peanut butter and a 3/4 container of Mayo sitting side by side together. No one was there, at the bus stop but this peanut butter and mayo together like they were friends…
A clan of Amish people (in “uniform”) playing miniature golf at a place on the Ocean City boardwalk.
Today at Walmart, I saw what my mother-in-law would look like if she were black. Spitting image, just darker complexion.
I saw my kids not fighting…
spooooky
Hmm … this recons me back to my Key West days. I remember having coffee one morning in an outdoor restaurant. I saw a guy walking down the street wearing a dress. Now this isn’t all that surprising of a sight in Key West. But he had a 3-day beard, looked like he hadn’t showered in a week and was wearing army boots. So, I think the picture is a bit clearer now.
A grunge tranny?
Umm … something like that … it was just one of those “undefined” you see in Key West.
Once I was walking around an abandoned army base, outside of the fence, and I noticed stuck in the barbed wire at the top of the fence, a jar. Upon closer inspection, it was a jar of hamburger relish with a very very faded label, so clearly it had been there for a while. Also, it was still full.
Also, I work at Wal-Mart. Yesterday at the cash register I scanned someone’s ant killer, and it came up on the screen as “any killer”. Hah!
On my roadtrip to New Mexico a few weeks ago, I passed a huge convoy of decorated Volkswagen New Beetles, all with different state and provincial license plates, in the middle of the desert.
A pair of white boxers on the “Welcome to New Middletown” sign across the street from my house.
Maybe it was an alien sent down to spy on the humans, and not knowing the difference it selected female clothes. Hilarity ensues.
OK, time to put away the Robotech DVDs.
The Rat Man was feeding birdies.
Okay, lemme explain: By Toronto City Hall there is a the Rat Man who stands on a corner near an iron gate. He is a quasi-homeless guy with a sign asking for spare change. On each shoulder, he has a snoozing rat (or 2, or 3). Along the entire length of his forearm, there are snoozing rats (6 or 7) – all draped over his arm so they face him and their tails hang down, all in a perfect, motionless row.
Firstly, these aren’t pet store rats, they are street rats. But what I find freakier is that they all just snooze there and don’t move. I’ve had pet hamsters, I’ve had friends with pet rats and they are twitchy, ever-moving creatures – except for him. It’s like they are hypnotized.
I’m used to seeing the rat man, and mostly, I think his hypnotic rat control is amazing.
But yesterday, what I saw takes the cake! The man must be Doctor Doolittle! He had bread crumbs in his free hand and was holding out his arm. Little, *wild[/] sparrows were flittering by, landing on his fingers and eating from his hand!
How the hell??? At one point he had two wild birdies land on his fingers and grab at the breadcrumbs. Like a Disney thing. Wild birdies perching on his fingers!!!
A few years ago, Harborwolf and I were driving through a VERY rural part of Michigan. For miles and miles, there was nothing but dense forest. All of a sudden, in the middle of nowhere, tacked to a tree, was a sign that read:
JAMS AND JELLIES.
I understand that perhaps someone was selling homemade preserves on the roadside at some point, but to drive and drive and drive through nothing and suddenly see a sign like that is really damn surreal.
I was watching an Oakland A’s game on TV a couple weeks ago and they did a shot of a guy in the audiance wearing these giant cartoon hands. Not like one of those foam “#1” fingers, but imagine if you had Mickey Mouse hands that were as big as your torso. He was waving them around in sorta slo-mo and doing this little dance. It was both hilarious and beautiful at the same time. Every few days my husband will say out of the blue: “I wonder where that guy got those hands?!” LOL! Haunting.
Three cans of tuna stacked in a neat pyramid next to my house. Two were of the “in oil” variety while the third was albacore in spring water. At first I thought some homeless person had left them there but I haven’t seen any around here for years.
Maybe its them neighborhood cats setting up reserve caches for their upcoming revolt.
Another Key West sight …
There is a guy down there that has a large dog we walks around town. What’s unusual is that the dog has a cat riding on its back and the cat has a mouse riding on its back. So it’s kind of a walking pyramid of natural enemies. Heh.
I saw a huge interstate sign that says “Orlando Next Left”. Which wouldn’t be weird but it was in the middle of a long dirt road WV. How they stole it or moved it all that way is beyond me.
At Wal-Mart some old fella suddenly sneezed violently and his artificial eye landed with a ‘plunk’ on the rubber conveyor belt.
At the library where I work, every few months I find a sticker stuck to the back (out-facing) part of our computer monitors at the front desk. It’s invariably the same thing; a cartoon fish with a belt of dynamite around his…er…waist, a lit stick of dynamite in his hand, a scowl, and a little white sailor hat. It’s the strangest thing ever, and nobody else who works there seems to notice them. I’ve kept a couple just so people don’t think I’m insane.
Not to hijack, but any suggestions as to what they might mean?
What’s the deal with Tuna? The other day the wife and I were out for a walk and at this bus stop there were three cans of unopened tuna, stacked there pyramidal. Weird.
Sometime ago, I was helping a friend drive a car here form NY. We proomised a third friend in Omaha that we’d drop in and visit, it’s about 2pm when we get off the Hwt in Omaha. Waliking accross the street at the foot of the ramp was a 6’2" black drag queen in a yellow miniskirt. Now I’m from Oakland so TVs are a pretty common sight, it just seemed a strange thing to see in Omaha, Nebraska.