Well maybe I should just go around butt naked!

The BBQ Pit
1

I’m sitting here so upset I’m about to cry, and I need a hug! :mad: But a chance to vent is good too.

Why is it that when I find decent professional clothes, I have to get them altered and that alterations cost a small fortune in and of themselves?!! If I’d known that, then I would have left those nice suits in the store, bargain bedamned! I can’t help it that I’m short and the petite section has crappy, overpriced shit hanging on the walls–out of my fucking reach, as if I’d want that crap anyways–while the sections for ladies who aren’t petite have a better selection that is a little more within my physical reach and price range. [sigh] I don’t want gaudy suits with sequins or other crap on them because that is not my style.

I want simple, elegant suits that look professional.

That I don’t have to pay a king’s ransom for.

Because I’m poor.

But I have to look professional.

So I can stay out of the poor house.

For what I’m going to have to pay to get those dangblasted suits altered so I don’t look a little kid who’s playing dress up with mommy’s clothes, I could have bought me a new pair of shoes, or a winter coat, or a nice bottle of Scotch or two. Life just isn’t fair!

Why is it that every goddamn shoe store/section I go in has shoes that have VERY high heels on them? What the fuck? If I wanted to torture my poor lil ol’ feet, all I would be able to find would be the sensible shoes with reasonable heels that have eluded me for at least a year now. :mad: I spent hours that I could have used to work on other projects whose deadlines are fast approaching running around dealing with these crazy crowds of fucking Christmas shoppers–BY THE WAY, I’M FUCKING SICK OF CHRISTMAS! I wish businesses/advertisers had never heard of St. Nicolas/Santa/the 3 Magi or however the hell this whole gift-giving in late December got started and then got the bright idea of brainwashing shoppers that they need to start Christmas shopping before Halloween’s even gotten here good. Bah, motherfucking humbug, I say. ?Entiendes?–Anyway, I had to wade through all the shoes that the poor harried salesfolk hadn’t had time to put back into any kind of a semblance of a display, only to find TWO pairs of boots that had a decent heel. One pair was too expensive, poorly made for costing the outrageous sum they did, and they didn’t fit! The other pair they had in every size but the one that would fit my poor foot.

For fuck’s sake, whoever is in charge of buying shoes for stores, please note the following:

I don’t want or need high heels.

I don’t need stiletto heels.

I don’t need clunky, chunky platform heels.

I don’t need fancy buckles, buttons, decals, fringe, or other doodads on my damn shoes.

Just give me plain, simple, low-heeled, elegant shoes that don’t cost that much.

That look professional.

That I don’t have to pay a king’s ransom for.

Because I’m poor.

But I have to look professional.

So I can stay out of the poor house.
Why is it that coats cost a motherfucking fortune?! Yeah, I had a good laugh looking at designer coats that cost $500+, but even when I got to the non-snooty designer ones, they cost anywhere in the $200-$400 range.

I know I shouldn’t have put off shopping for this stuff until now, but I’ve been too busy to do it before now, and I really don’t even have time to do it now, :frowning: but it’s getting down to the wire–my clothes ain’t looking as professional as they used to, and I wasn’t thinking about folks cluttering up the damn stores with their mad dash to do Christmas shopping now.

Why can’t I just snap my fingers and my closet be filled with the items I need?

Why can’t the folks who design clothes and buy clothes for department stores, be more considerate of us short, ultra busy ladies?

!Dios mio! Me duele la cabeza porque no lo entiendo a la predisposicion de moda ahora mismo. !Es loca!

[celestina going off to get herself a shot of Scotch]

2

Lo siento. “no lo entiendo a la predisposicion . . .” debe ser "no la entiendo a la predisposicion . . . "

3

Ahhh, well, I can’t offer much to this thread except a hug. I’d say you’ve got until Thanksgiving before it gets really bad. So, er, good luck.

[sub]If you do decide to go with the title, make sure to send us some pics of your lovely new attire, eh? :D[/sub]

4

Ahhh, well, I can’t offer much to this thread except a hug. I’d say you’ve got until Thanksgiving before it gets really bad. So, er, good luck.

[sub]If you do decide to go with the title, make sure to send us some pics of your lovely new attire, eh? :D[/sub]

5

I wholeheartedly agree with this rant and would like to add my two cents:

Just once I would like to own a pair of pants that don’t hang down two inches past my heels. I am five feet three inches tall. I’m so dreadfully sorry I wasn’t able to grow two more inches so I could fit into your overpriced merchandise, but I didn’t. If this keeps on happening, I will take those two-inches-too-long pants and wrap them around your spindly little neck until you stop twitching.

Just once I would like to be able to find a pair of shoes in my size that are wide. I am so sorry that I hate shoes and do not wear them unless absolutely necessary, but this would not have happened if you made shoes that a)weren’t ugly b)weren’t uncomfortable and/or c)didn’t fall apart after a year. I do not like having to go a half size up because you are too fucking lazy to make or stock more shoes in wide. If this keeps on happening, I will take your ugly, cheap, uncomfortable shoes and beat you about the head and shoulders with them until you stop twitching.

Don’t get me started about not being able to fecking FIND petite clothes in most stores unless you happen to show up the day the trucks come in.

6

I just want to say that working while bare-ass naked is quite enjoyable. I would like to take this opportunity to thank my employer for giving me work from home options, conference calls have never been so much fun! :smiley:

7

I vote for naked, myself.

8

Yeah, well let me give you this little point to ponder:

What if your job required you to wear the same damn outfit, day in, and day out?

Tripler
Green is sooo five minutes ago . . . :rolleyes:

9

Good rant. If I can add a little…

I’m 5’5" and a size 8. Why the fuck can’t I find any pants that fit me right?. Seriously. The torsos are always too high (the tops of the pants are practically up to my breasts), so I try petite, and then the legs are too short.

I can’t be coherent on this issue anymore. ARGH!

10

You know, if you did walk around naked, I bet you’d get a lot of offers for hugs in no time flat.

11

Have you tried resale shops? I have gotten some pretty nice stuff secondhand. Probably not shoes, but I know I’ve seen lots of nice suits while out shopping at resale, Salvation Army, places like that. You may have to still have them altered but you can get some really expensive clothes for prices that I’m sure would fit your budget.

As for the alterations, they’re expensive because it’s basically custom work. That sucks. I got a really nice holiday dress last year on eBay for $10.00, and paid $14.00 to have the straps shortened. It was worth it though.

You could try simple things like hemming up your pants yourself. You could see if a small new/used sewing machine would be cheaper than the cost of your alterations, if you think that would be an option. Maybe you know someone who can sew who could teach you. (I give minor alterations to my mom.)

It does suck about the shoes and not being able to find good petite clothes though. I’m 5’3" but I guess I’m lucky because most of the things I buy fit alright, and I like my pants to be a bit long.

Shoes I couldn’t offer any advice. I have one pair of high heeled platform dress shoes, one pair of Dr. Martens, one pair of cowboy boots, and one pair of tennis shoes. I never have to wear a suit anywhere so I haven’t had that issue arise. :slight_smile:

12

I dunno about alterations, but if there’s a Value City near you they have really nice, really cheap stuff.

13

Hell-forget alterations. If you got a sewing machine, you could make your own stuff, stupid petites be damned.

And I hear you. I’m 5/3 and I can never find jeans that don’t fall five feet past my ankles.

14

Thank you, everyone who responded. Y’all just don’t know how much better I felt as soon as I pressed Submit and saw this thread take to life. :smiley: I’m glad folks have found this thread a place to vent about their clothing problems, and I hope others will use it to vent about their clothes if they need to.

BayleDomon, thank you for the hug, Sweetie. Getting your hug makes me feel even better. :slight_smile: I will say that the crowds are pretty hellacious now. I shudder to think what they’ll be like after Thanksgiving, but I won’t even bother to go near a mall then.

SpazCat, girl, I feel ya. My jeans are always too long, and I just usually roll them up or something, but I can’t do that with pants suits. My feet are difficult to fit, and I agree completely about having to mob the petite clothes delivery person before they can even get their trucks unloaded good. It’s just ridiculous the shit we short folks have to go through to find decent clothes.

LOL!!! Cheesesteak, you’re so naughty! :smiley: Thank you for posting what you did. It just put me right in a fit of the giggles, and I needed that. I sure do wish I had the option of working more from home, but alas, I have to be out among folks, so I can’t work in the nude like you do. [sigh] Still, when I get on a conference call, I’ll always wonder from here on out if the person at the other line is wearing any clothes. :wink:

[giggle] Well, Bryan Ekers, just so long as you vote tomorrow, I don’t care what your attire or lack thereof is, hon. :wink: You have to admit, it might spice things up if we had the Naked Party, rather than the boring ol’ Democrat, Republican, Independent labels. Since some folks are so fickle about voting for parties, maybe we should consider renaming the parties for naughty things to help encourage apathetic folks to exercise their right to vote. Okay, I’ll get off that soapbox.

Tripler so are you trying to tell us you have to wear a green outfit every single day, and you don’t like it because the color’s out of style? Well, if it’s your job, you really don’t get much say so in how you want to dress. If you don’t like wearing green uniforms, then either find anotehr job, or really go all out, stressing your clothing style when you’re off the clock, hon. I must say, it must be nice not having to worry about putting a wardrobe together, if you already have a uniform. Of course, if it were me having to don a uniform, then I’d probably have to get the damn thing altered, and the alterations would still cost me a fucking fortune. :mad:

Giraffe, hon. You don’t have to worry. I won’t go outside butt naked. I was using hyperbole to stress the sarcasm I was feeling at the song and dance I’ve been going through trying to get my wardrobe together. Believe me. As pissed as I am, I don’t aspire to the kinds of hugs you’re talking about.

Kyla, girl, don’t get me started on pants. I have so many problems with them not fitting right it ain’t even funny. [sigh]

jinwicked, thanks for the suggestions, Sweetie. I do know how to hem clothes, and I’ve taken a few sewing classes. It’s just that with suits, I can’t get the right perspective on where the hem should go, if I’m wearing the clothes. I don’t have anyone to take the measurements for me. And trying to hem clothes with lining in them is a bitch. As far as shopping in thrift stores and whatnot, I don’t have the time to do so. That requires a lot of time to pick through the piles and make sure that everything fits right. By the time I do all that, I might as well just go to the department stores. I’m glad you don’t have trouble finding clothes that suit you, and I hope you don’t have to put up with the hell of finding decent suits. :slight_smile:

Super Gnat, thanks for the suggestion. I’ll have to check to see if that store’s around here. It doesn’t sound familiar, though.

Guin, if only sewing didn’t take so much time, and I wasn’t so lazy and such a procrastinator. If it were left up to me to sew my own clothes, then I really would be walking around butt naked. But like I was telling others, it’s difficult for me at least to make sure the measurements are right when I’m wearing the clothes. I don’t have anyone else to do the pinning/measuring for me when it comes time to do alterations. [sigh]

15

I’m 5’9" and have long legs, and have trouble finding pants that don’t look like “highwater” pants on me. I also have large (size 10) but very narrow feet, and so most shoes I get are too wide.

Kind of the opposite problem from most, but you can see that I can empathize.

16

My whole life I’ve heard from short and/or plump women that clothes are made for women like me. I’m built tall and thin - not as skinny as a model. Like Denise, I can’t find pants that reach my ankles or jackets that reach my wrists. I have to buy everything two sizes too big. I almost cried when I had to buy a suit. I spent $250 and still looked like a dork. Who are the clothes made for? At least if you’re short, you can just get them hemmed, but you can only lengthen things a little. Isn’t ridiculous that men’s clothes come in different lengths when women’s shapes are more varied and we’re judged so much on how we look?

17

Is it me, or isn’t that supposed to be “buck naked”? Since when did “butt naked” become the standard? Not that I mind, mind you… :wink:

celestina, in all seriousness, I sympathize from the opposite end of the spectrum. I’m also fairly poor, and at 6’6" and 270 pounds, I’m pretty hard to fit. Even if you don’t count the size 16 shoes, shopping for clothes for me is a joke, and almost invariably expensive. Value Village is an exercise in futility, most times. I can reach all of the clothes, but most of them are far too small. Even if the pants fit my waist, they usually show lots of ankle (woo-woo, I know).

I’m lucky, though, to work in a place where I don’t have to look all that professional. My wife, on the other hand, does. She’s a teacher, and she’s expected to look professional. I find it funny, in a cruel twisted sort of way, that teachers are expected to dress professionally but aren’t paid professional wages. Nice touch, that. I figure, if you expect your employees to dress like pros, you pay them like pros. But hey, that’s just me I guess.

Not much I can offer other than sympathy and agreement, I suppose. But if you ever are in need of something on a high shelf and see me walking around (you can’t miss me, really), don’t hesitate to ask for help. I’m always happy when my freakish height can actually do some good, and I like helping people. Just ask, OK? hug

18

Avalonian, I was thinking, “Wow, that really is a big girl!” But you’re a guy, right? Even with the mention of the wife, I’m not assuming anything!

19

laughing Though I have known a couple girls as big as I am, and you’re absolutely right about not making any assumptions… I am indeed a guy. I forgot to clear that up. chortle

Does that mean I can get started on how women get to wear all the fun clothes? I suppose it’s a trade off… as a guy, I get the plainer clothing selection, but I also don’t get bras or high-heels foisted upon me.

20

Alas, sewing is really the best option. The durn-blasted retail designers are just not gonna cater to any of us who are not “standard”.

In my case, I’m a Big Girl with some semblance of a waistline and a bustline. I’m also 5’4", so I’m not tall. I don’t need to wear big tanky things that are for someone far taller than me. I need something that goes in at the waist a little, because I actually have a little bit of waistline there. I need something that allows for a bust, because I’ve sure got that. I’m sometimes OK when I buy tops and pants seperately, but dresses are usually hopeless. They are too tight (and too low cut) in the bust, and swim in the waist.

The only way to get a dress to fit is to make it myself. Dresses designed to fit are actually flattering. Ill-fitting dresses put pounds on me, and obviously that is not an attractive option for someone who has too many extra pounds already.

I used to sew a lot, and hope to get back into it. Over the years I sewed a lot of things. I used several simple patterns, altering and adjusting them until they fit me just right. I kept sewing them over and over again, with different fabrics, and no one guessed that I was using the same design! I have about (I kid you not) 30 “dressy” rayon shell tops that I made from a simple (Donna Karan, I think it was) Vogue pattern. Who cares that I used the same pattern? A shell top is a shell top! And I have reused the same relatively simple trouser pattern, many times, and the same fitted, lined skirt pattern, etc. etc. Who cares? Who knows? As long as the fabric is different, most people never notice.

I haven’t sewn lined “businessy” jackets (and I doubt I ever will) but I have gotten the shell tops, skirts and pants down pat. When you are sewing the same pattern over and over again, you get very fast and very confident in your sewing. (I could do a shell top in about 2 hours from beginning to end.)

Being able to whip out a simple top, skirt or pant overnight (and I got it down to a science) can save a LOT of money. I am talking A LOT. I am guessing that these “dressy” tops, skirts and pants retail for $30, $40 or more? I make 'em for $8 or $10 or less. It’s worth looking into, it really is. The feeling of empowerment is tremendous. Once you get past the point of “altering/experimenting” with the pattern, and have a pattern adjusted so that you KNOW it will fit right, you can bang those garments out in no time! It’s a rush, I tell ya.

Well, my sympathies, all the way around, to everyone who can’t find decent things to wear in the stores. I think we all need to revolt and start sewing more. Screw 'em!