Big, big news locally, but I don’t know if anywhere else picked it up. It’s sufficiently crazy that some weird news column might have. If it did and you’ve been following it, I come with bad tidings: Farmington, Maine didn’t transform into the prophesied New Jerusalem last Tuesday at 7:30am, all our diseases were not cured, we are not now in a deathless state, and our harmonious love levels have not improved.
Front page story today in the county newspaper, with a big color picture of the town meeting that was held in the gazebo across the street from the courthouse and next to the dentist’s, with some 80 people present to hear the revelation.
The prophet, 60-something year old Licia Kuenning, who has been talking about this all year since Jesus spoke to her directly about what was going to happen, wrote a 500 page book about it, consitantly rented the only not-a-billboard* in town to carry the proclimation, and took out a full page ad in the paper when the time drew near, took to the gazebo steps just after 7:30 and announced (I’m paraphrasing here):
“Well, I didn’t notice any changes this morning. Guess I was wrong. Bit disappointing. Meeting canceled.”
Billboards are illegal here, except for that homemade one by the river, which had been removed a couple times before everyone finally just decided to call it not-a-billboard and let it stay.
But you need to understand that it has nothing to do with the New World Order.
We don’t advertise. We don’t make predictions. And, we most definitely don’t make news-worthy events.
We are already at 72.6 % in control. We don’t NEED no stinkin’ bodges.
When we assume control of Planet Earth, which will be soon, almost 3 out of four people will be of the NWO. If you’re in a group of 4 people, 3 of them will be NWO. If this ain’t you, well…
Licia Kuenning and I are about the same age. I recomend a trip to Wiscasset to listen to the music box collection. Follow that up with an outing to Moody’s Diner on Route 1 for some peanut butter pie. She’ll be all right by and by.
The scientologists over on Islesboro haven’t given up just yet.
Hey, Dusty! Look! Up in the sky! It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s a fly!
“Well, I didn’t notice any changes this morning. Guess I was wrong. Bit disappointing. Meeting canceled.”
I have to admit I am somewhat impressed with the honesty and candor. They could have easily said, “Ooops, I meant the year 2066. Sorry, but Jesus mumbles when he talks to me.”
Someone needs to talk to this woman and show her how to do it right: plausible deniability and gobs of money to support her prophecyhood/welfare of her followers when the time comes.
Is that the woman who was protesting gay marriage out side the University of Maine at Farmington Student Center during when propoisition 1 was being voted on? Cause she was crazy. Never mind prop 1 didn’t have a damned thing to do with gay marriage all it did was say you couldn’d discriminate against gay people. Heck it even had a clause stating that this law couldn’t be used create new rights (such as marriage)
Lots of people were vocally supporting either side of number 1 at UMF, especially around the Heath speech*. I didn’t pay much attention to the naysayers, but she’s not a very pleasant woman, so it wouldn’t surprise me.
She wasn’t the crazy with the homemade sign outside the theatre protesting Brokeback Mountain (a week into its run, must have missed the memo).
*I didn’t get involved. I was confident it would be rejected, I did my part in voting, and it was rejected by a good sized margin. I get the feeling he wasn’t exactly prepared to have anyone disagree with him. I mean the whole “there was never any homosexual activity in ancient Greece” was just one of a long string of laughable answers he gave to questioners.
Of course #1 didn’t have anything to do with marriage, but it was an easier target. Had they spoke about what the law is actually for, a large majority of their base would have evaporated and they’d be left with only the most frothing at the mouth bigots.
For those of you wondering what the hell we are talking about here is an explanation: Our State Legislature (Maine for those of you not paying attention) passed a bill saying that you couldn’t discriminate against gay people. The vote was a vote for whether the vote would stay on the books. Voting yes repealed it, and voting no kept it on the books.
