What about all the plant life on Earth? As already pointed out, this flood would cause tons of brackish water to cover the entire surface of the planet. Then, the water spicket gets turned off, the magical drain is pulled, and somehow the land comes back above sea level. As all of this happens, immense amounts of salt have seeped into the Earth everywhere, and if I have a basic understanding of agriculture and botony, nothing would be able to grow. Am I right? Did God poof all the salt left in the ground away too? Why do people even pretend that the Bible, in any portion, can be taken literally?
To come back to this: why?
We’re working on a translation. What is the original word used and what is the connotation of that word in its original language? Why should we use these words in their modern and English meanings versus the meanings in the original language?
There are languages in which water creatures are distinct from land creatures. And in which the distinction between some insects and small animals is not all that great. Apparently, locusts are “4-legged” if John the Baptist was to have kept kosher.
It’s certainly possible that the original story was heavily implied to mean only land creatures (as we English speakers understand it) were to be placed on the Ark. Not saying this is the case, but it’s possible.
If we’re going to be Biblical literalists, we could choose a better language than English to read the Bible literally.
It seems to me that aquatic mammals, waterfowl as well as aquatic and marine reptiles would have had little problem with the flood.
Dude - see above, “brackish mix.”
In Biblical times, God literally spoke to people and salt was much, much less salty.
This is beautiful and brought a tear to my eye…(sniff, sniff)
“You really have no idea about what such an event would cause, do you? And, ironically enough, neither did the folks who wrote that story and made it a world wide event. They had no idea how big the world actually was, or what such a flood would entail. But they had an excuse that you don’t…they didn’t know any of these things, nor did they have any way of finding out at the time…you do. Yet you remain ignorant anyway.”
-XT
Did Noah like fish sticks?
If only Jesus was there. He could’ve taken care of the fishes. And the loaves.
Bri2k
How did he keep his beer cold on the Ark?
Probably by dropping his six-packs into the fishtanks with the tilapia.
Good grief, guys…if it rained for 40 days and 40 nights, do you really think he’d have trouble keeping his beer cold?? I want to know how he made his microwave popcorn and were he was able to order pizza from…THOSE are the really tough questions!
-XT
Well DUH. The thunder powered up the microwave! (The pizza’s a mystery, though)
Huh…I always thought it would have been the lightning. But that’s why I love this place…you learn something every day here!
Anyone got any ideas about the pizza aspect? I think it’s a critical hole in an otherwise, um, watertight story…
-XT
The Book of Pepperoni 4:19 states that Noah brought two pizzas with him as well.
I could buy him having water buffalo for the cheese, and pepperoni (possibly even sausage, since that’s my favorite combination…extra cheese of course, cheese of Biblical proportions in fact on a nice thin pre-New York style crust). I’d even buy tomatoes for the sauce (he could have gotten them when God dropped off the animals from North America, possibly along with some good smoking weed). I could even buy that the pizzas were frozen (not initially, though God could have flash frozen them on his whirlwind tour of the arctic when he was picking up the animals there)…I’m guessing that 40 days and nights without sunlight (well, the nights would have already been, you know, night and all) and with more than torrential rains would have dropped the temperature at least a bit (vast understatement), but how did he HEAT the pizzas on the Ark? How did he get that thin, golden crust and perfect meltage of the cheese and blending of the ingredients??
This is one case where ‘God did it’ just ain’t gonna work…I don’t see God as a pizza baker or pizza delivery, er, being…so how did Noah do it?? Huh? I’m feeling the whole story unravel here…
-XT
Yeah, but in verse 4:20 we read ‘and Noah said wait (pause) oh yeah, better make it two of each kind, Dude.’
God damnit, I would drown the whole world right now for a pizza.
Marsh birds would also have had a very tough time in the flood. The world certainly would have been de-railed if Noah hadn’t brought some along.
Getting back to fishes on the Ark:
There are a few species of freshwater fish in Hawaii that are endemic - found only in Hawaii:
*Kuhlia xenura * Hawaiian flagtail
*Lentipes concolor * Alamo’o
*Stenogobius hawaiiensis * O’opu naniha
How did these freshwater fish make it to Hawaii? Did Noah place them there himself? Did they manage to swim there after the flood? If so, how did they survive the massive amounts of brackish water and the silty conditions? OR is it another case of Goddidit?
I was hoping someone would do this for be, but
‘I’m Noah, and so’s my wife!’