While this might be a general question, I figure there is no simple answer, so I’m guessing MPSIMS is the correct forum.
Making a long story reasonably short, my wife is acquainted with some animal-rescue people who have a probelm they’re hoping we’ll assume responsibility for. They’re a mother-daughter team, in which the mother is highly emotional, often talking of worst-case scenarios, and (in my wife’s words) “wallowing in” bad feelings when animals are abused or homeless.
A neglected (possibly abused, but it’s difficult to glean truth in this woman’s strident rhetoric) dog, pregnant with nine puppies, was facing the needle at a kill shelter. This lady guilted her daughter into taking on the dog and all nine puppies, against the daughter’s judgment of her capacity, and promised to do the essential care herself. The arrangement was temporary, just to keep the dogs alive, while permanent homes would be sought.
All nine puppies were born, and seven have been rehomed, leaving the mama dog and her two offspring. The daughter is now at the end of her rope in caring for all her other rescue animals plus these three. The mother has not lived up to her promise to assume care responsibility, and it’s caused a huge mother-daughter rift, but she apparently feels that any rhetoric that results in a living dog is justifiable (she’s pretty extreme).
Both mother and daughter are desperately broke, having overspent to rescue animals from Katrina, in addition to the endless flood of animals in need from normal human misbehavior.
Meanwhile, mama dog has been cured of a hookworm infestation – or so says the unreliable woman who will say anything to save the dog. But mama dog still has a major heartworm infestation.
I am told that it takes months for the worms to filter out of the heart chambers after the heartworm-killing medicine is started, because too many killed too fast would clog up her circulation. I am told that she needs to remain calm during this course of treatment (presumably to prevent heart attacks/clots?). I am told that this course of treatment is horribly expensive and sometimes fatal to the dog. I am told that waiting makes the problem worse, and it’s already been allowed to languish months after the diagnosis of heartworm infestation.
I am also told that my wife and I are the dog’s last hope. The rescue folks are out of money, patience, and ability to cope. My wife would commit our time, money, and household in a heartbeat for this dog, whom I admit is a sweetie. But I am the lone holdout. I am attempting delaying tactics in the campaign to wear me down and get us to foster/pay for/possibly adopt this sick doggie.
We have a little bit of money at the moment due to our refinancing the house. We also have a long wishlist of items on which the wife wants to burn this money, and these vet bills are not in that original budget. Thus, while it appears superficially that we can “afford to” help, I’m not so sure.
We also have counterindications: my wife is allergic to dogs; we have five bite-sized parrots who are used to being out of their cages and spending time with us, and will not understand being locked away. We live in a small two-bedroom condo. I personally am not a fan of bringing parasitic worms into the house, if it can be avoided.
Practical questions: Has anyone had a fully-infested dog go through a heartworm deworming regimen? What’s involved, in cost, time, effort, suffering, likelihood of success? What would I be getting us all into?
Does anyone believe that a pit bull/basset hound mix would be safe around small birds? Birds who sometimes fly down onto the floor? My wife assures me that it would be safe; I am less sanguine.
Is it even theoretically possible to say no, condemning a sweet dog to the needle, and still be married? 
Bear in mind that, once we’ve shown ourselves to be sugar daddies for the financial needs of desperate dogs, we’re looking at the wagging tip of an enormous furry iceberg. As far as I can tell, every night the warm-hearted but financially and physically overstretched animal rescue lady goes online and looks for more dogs and cats to help. And she’s “couting on” us. As much as I sympathize – and I do – I cannot let us become a cash cow for an open-ended permanent emergency.
Advice and personal stories welcomed.
Sailboat