What are YOU doing to squash ULs?

Factual Questions
1

This isn’t pretty, but I need to show you all something:

http://www.geocities.com/attrayant_1/cookie2.jpg

You might think that working for a fortune-50 company would remove you from these persistent buggers. Hardly. There is a coin-slot type box in the break room for your pull tabs (help Ron’s kids, don’t ya know), the Neiman Marcus cookie recipe makes its rounds every few months or so, and just last week several of my coworkers were urging me to take part in the great gas-out this weekend because of an email from their sister in law.

I wanna give up.

Try to educate people and they look at you like you’re nuts. Toss the pull-tab box in the garbage and you’re hurting Ron’s kids. If you politely refuse a copy of the cookie recipe then you must be insensitive to the misfortune of somebody’s poor old mother who got stuck with a $350 bill for the recipe. Tell them that the gas-out is utter nonsense and all of a sudden you’re on the side of the oil tycoons.

Soooo… what are you guys doing to put out the fire? How many of you with a web page display a prominent link to Snopes?

Anybody ever felt like they successfully turned a chain email junkie away from the dark side of the force?

2

It depends on the mood I am in…sometimes I get all fired up with that reformers zeal and send notes back (polite, gentle, friendly notes…most of these people are my friends/family), basically saying that it’s all a crock, and suggesting they research future forwards on snopes at least.

And then other times I get convinced that there is just no point, that for some people, especially people new to the 'net, that if it comes in e-mail that makes it credible, period, and damn common sense.

3

Oh, and I forgot to mention- that is a scan of a paper recipe I was given many years ago (I was in my mid-teens, so it’s been about 20 years) when 99.9% of the general public didn’t have computers or email. I wish you could appreciate the sheer age of this document- it looks like it should be under glass in the National Archives building. Amazing that hardly a word has changed in all that time, but I see that the going rate for the recipe has at least kept up with inflation.

4

Last week, I received the tired e-mail about the gang who has its newest members lurk at gas stations so they can climb into your backseat, then kidnap you and take you to the “gang headquarters” where you will be gangraped by the gang. I was so annoyed, I looked it up on Snopes and then responded to everyone on the e-mail that this stupid UL has been circulating since 1967 and there is no need to now be paranoid at the gas station. It came off as really bitchy so I had to send a follow-up apologizing for the bitchiness. But that’s another story.

5

I am proud to say that I have fought the good fight.

A few weeks ago, I was on a business trip to Omaha. I was with some coworkers and the discussion got around to where we couls go for lunch. Someone mentioned KFC. Another person then told everyone that she didn’t eat at KFC anymore since she heard that they use genetically engineered animals that can no longer be called chickens. I jumped right in and told her it was false.
She said that she had gottten an e-mail telling her about it. I told her that not all e-mails are 100% accurate. I then told her to go to Snopes.com.
Then the discussion got around to various UL’s concerning fast food places. I recognized most of them, and told people to go to Snopes.com to see prove that they are false.
Overall, most of the people were already skeptical of the stories and we managed to convince a couple of people that they were false.

“Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent” Isaac Asimov

6

For the most part, it’s useless. I could not convince my aunt that the -gry riddle was altered and the answer was intended to be “language” as in “there are only three words in the English language.” Most people react with some bizarre, vehement form of defense with lines like, “No, no, this REALLY happened to a friend of mine.” My friend knows a girl who actually CLAIMS to have had a spider lay eggs under her skin and watched them hatch with hundreds of spiders crawling out. Why the hell would you lie about something like that? It’s not a goddamn religion, it’s an urban legend! What do you say to these people? I did successfully set one of friends straight in regard to “the hanging munchkin” in the Wizard of Oz, but the victories are far and few between.

7

I fight the fight. Pissing people off in the process sometimes, but dammit, the fight against ignorance is a life style. Sometimes I mass reply to everyone who got it. Then I go back and send it to the people one step back in the forwarding process. Always link to the answers, and always givbbe a synopsis for those who won’t read the link.
And never give up.

At first, I was despised. Now my friends send me their forwards first to ask if there’s any validity. Keep the faith.

–John

'Twis brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

8

The gang-member-gas-station UL was told to me many years ago, by someone who had it happen to her husband’s coworker’s friend’s mother. I had never heard of it before but I kind of figured out it was in the same league as the Donohue show where it was proven that P&G was owned by satanists - my friend’s boyfriend’s sister’s friend’s cousin watched that show, you know.

Here’s the scary thing. You know the one about gang members driving w/o headlights after dark, shooting people who flash their headlights at them. Well, the cops here were telling that one, and the city council tried to pin them down about it, asking exactly when and to whom it had happened. Cops had to admit, well, er actually, it hadn’t. Yet. But a bunch went off to the state capitol for some sort of gang summit and told the same story as fact. Reporters from here had gone there and said - wait a minute, hadn’t we established that that was fiction? Oh - oh - yeah.

Personally, I think all the gang initiation crap is highly overrated. Every time there’s juvenile crime around here it’s assumed to be gang-related, and almost all the time it turns out it’s not.

9

I have successfully debunked the “black people will lose the right to vote in 2007” rumor and am actively fighting the KFC rumor both to my roommate (who is black and was ready to riot over his right to vote).

I’ve also (finally) convinced one of my co-workers that cockroaches from Taco Bell don’t lay eggs in your gums/cheeks/brain/whatever.

But I’m ready to give up and accept that the human population is hopelessly ignorant and hopelessly gullible. The ignorance is spreading faster than Captain Trips from The Stand, and it sometimes seems there’s no stopping it. sigh

What can ya do?

If you say it, mean it. If you mean it, do it.
If you do it, live it. If you live it, say it.

Joe Cool

10

I think I have (temporarily) killed Craig Shergold around my office-place; after my sixth “NO, NO, NO” email about 16 months ago I haven’t seen it circulate since. I also waged a campaign against the Canadian version of the “Bill 602P” hoax about a year ago. Can’t make much headway against the pull tab thing though. Tried the “gas-out”-out fight, but with mixed results. Saw the LSD-tatoo thing in the old hometown paper a few months back but said to hell with it.

Dee da dee da dee dee do do / Dee ba ditty doh / Deedle dooby doo ba dee um bee ooby / Be doodle oodle doodle dee doh http://members.xoom.com/labradorian/

11

depending on if i know the person that sent me the chain letter/UL…i send this out…
sorry about the formatting, if it’s messed out…i copied and pasted it from an email…

…
Hello, my name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of being kidnapped and
executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, then that poor 6 year old girl in Arkansas
with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to the travelling freak show.
Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you and everyone you send “his” email to $1000? How stupid are you? Ooooh, lookyhere! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I’ll get laid by
every Playboy model in the magazine! What a bunch of bullshit.
So basically, this message is a big FUCK YOU to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards.
Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by Jesus in 5 A.D. and was brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the
year 2000, it’ll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity.
Fuck them.
If you’re going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I’ve seen all the “send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being” forwards about 90 times. I don’t fucking care.
Show a little intelligence and think about what you’re actually contributing to by sending out forwards. Chances are it’s your own unpopularity.
THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
Chain Letter Type 1:
(scroll down)
Make a wish!!!
No, really, go on and make one!!!
Oh please, they’ll never go out with you!!! Wish something else!!!
Not that, you pervert!!
Is your finger getting tired yet?
STOP!!!
Wasn’t that fun? :slight_smile:
Hope you made a great wish :slight_smile:
Now, to make you feel guilty, here’s what I’ll do.
First of all, if you don’t send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will be raped by a mad goat and thrown off a high building into a pile of manure.
It’s true!
Because, THIS letter isn’t like all of those fake ones, THIS one is TRUE!! Really!!!
Here’s how it goes:
*Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
*Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
*Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot on your life.
*Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will firebomb your house.
Thanks!!! Good Luck!!!

Chain Letter Type 2
Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is a starving
little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms, no legs, no parents, and no goats. This little boy’s life could be saved, because for every time you pass this on, a dollar will be donated to the Little Starving Legless Armless Goatless Boy from Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund. Oh, and remember, we have absolutley no way of counting the emails sent and this is all a
complete load of bullshit. So go on, reach out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47
seconds.
Oh, and a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people, you will die
instantly. Thanks again!!
--------------------------------------------- Chain Letter Type 3
Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897. This is absolutely incredible because there was no email then and probably not as many sad pricks with nothing better to do. So this is how it
works:
Pass this on to 15,067 people in the next 7 minutes or something horrible will happen to you like:
*Bizarre Horror Story #1
Miranda Pinsley was walking home from school on Saturday. She had recently recieved this letter and ignored it. She then tripped in a crack in the sidewalk, fell into the sewer, was gushed down a
drainpipe in a flood of poopie, and went flying out over a waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty, she died. This Could Happen To You!!!
*Bizarre Horror Story #2
Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail and ignored it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his boyfriend (hey, some people swing that way). They both died and went to hell
and were cursed to eat adorable kittens every day for eternity. This Could Happen To You Too!!!
Remember, you could end up just like Pinsley and Bip. Just send this letter to all of your loser friends, and everything will be okay.

Chain Letter Type 4:
As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote. Send it to every one of your friends.
Friends
A friend is someone who is always at your side,
A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of shit, and your breath smells like you’ve been eating catfood,
A friend is someone who likes you
even though you’re as ugly as a hat full of assholes,
A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you’ve soiled yourself,
A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your sad, sad life,
A friend is someone who pretends they like
you when they really think you should be raped by mad chimpanzees, then thrown to vicious dogs,
A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then gets the check and leaves and doesn’t speak much English…* no, sorry that’s the cleaning lady, A friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because he wants his wish of being rich to come true.
Now pass this on! If you don’t, you’ll never have sex ever again.

12

I alway reply to ULs with a reference to Snopes.

You may think I’m a force for good but…

I have to admit I started a couple brand-new ULs last week, to see if they spread.

Sorry.

13

I fight the good fight… and I have had some success. I work with a non-profit group that supports people with a little-known disease (www.pemphigus.org) One of the services is an on-line support group. Since many of these people are older, and got the computer mostly to collect info that can help them, they are particularly vulnerable.

For a while it was urban legends heaven. I checked each and every one, sending the link to the exact location at Snopes or other urban legends sites. I was a nag and people were upset: “I don’t know… but what if it was true?” Others were pleased, and in the end we have reduced the UL reporting significantly. And yes, we have links to Snopes on the website.

14

  1. When my sister sent me one, I told her politely that it was deeply silly, and she now makes a point of telling me that she enjoys collecting Urban Legends. So I sent her a whole list of UL websites, including Snopes.

  2. When a well-intentioned member of my peer group at church kept faithfully forwarding all sorts of junk e-mail to me (Bill Gates is the Anti-Christ, etc.) I tactfully asked her to take me off her forwarding list, but didn’t tell her exactly why. No sense hurting her feelings.

  3. The touchingly young and naive Youth Pastor at our church recently started sending out the same sort of thing as Number 2 (above), by using our church chat loop, which I resented. First he sent us the Great Gas-Out, then it was “Madalyn Murray O’Hair is trying to shut down Christian broadcasters” (again! I remember it from back in the 70’s when the petitions were paper, not electronic.) (And I thought she was dead, anyway, or officially missing or something. If she’s dead or missing, how can she be leading the fight to get “Touched By An Angel” off the air?)

So I forwarded the About.com Urban Legends page with the M.M. O’Hair UL on it to him, with a brief sarcastic note from me. I sincerely hope he took the point.

Fortunately, all the other people who send me e-mail seem to understand instinctively about ULs.

Other than that, I think you just have to get used to it. It’s going to be a fact of life on the 21st century Internet, the way roadside litter became a fact of life with the 20th century automobile.

15

Sometimes there’s nothing you can do but just throw your hands up in disgust. Some things you shouldn’t even have to direct someone to scopes to debunk – it should be obvious to anyone with the brain God gave a turnip.

This is an actual email exchange I had with, what I would have otherwise considered, a reasonably intelligent friend…

From: changed_name@school.edu (yes, my friend works in the educational system here in the good ol’ USofA)
To: Shayna@myemailaddy.here
Subj: Fw: New Wheels! Please forward…

(My friend’s words): Yall all know I need new wheels…the Beamer is getting on up there. Wonder what it would be like to drive a Honda? Call me crazy or call me lucky?

(853,726 email addresses removed to protect the chronically stupid)

Jo: Read this and forward it to lots of people. You never know what might happen.

ml

Hi, Friends! I got this e-mail forwarded to me and thought you would enjoy the competitive spirit behind it. :slight_smile: Forward it and we’ll see if it works. We all love Hondas, right?

First off, I just want everyone to know that this is the real thing. I forwarded this message to everyone I know about 6 months ago and last week a Honda employee showed up at my house with my brand new 1999 Civic EX!!! It is so funny because I never believed these things worked and actually I sent this one as a joke to all my friends. But they forwarded the message too and now I have received a new car!!!

Bob Stanley, Denver Colorado

Friends,

Look I know this sounds too good to be true, and that’s what I thought too. But I called Honda’s headquarters in Japan and spoke to an American representative myself and it really is true! They assured me that this the real thing! I still wasn’t convinced but I called three weeks later and my Honda account balance has reached the unbelievable sum of $12,500!!! So even if you don’t believe this, forward it anyway so my account will continue to grow until I get my brand new Prelude!!!

Steve Kelly, Minneapolis Minnessota

Dear valued potential customers:

Here at Honda we have been well known for over 20 years for providing the best in reliabillity, comfort, and style. Over the years we have risen to be one of the top auto industries here in Japan. But that isn’t enough. We want to be number one in the US.

[Everyone knows how this stupid email goes, so I’ve deleted the majority of the body.]

I thank you for your time and business.

Sincerely,
Kageyama Hironobu
Senior Honda Marketing Advisor

From: Shayna@myemailaddy.here
To: changed_name@school.edu
Subj: Re: Fw: New Wheels! Please forward…

Please tell me you don’t really believe this is true! LOL

From: changed_name@school.edu
To: Shayna@myemailaddy.here

Of course I don’t believe it is true, but hot dang, what if it is and I get a new car!

Hugs,
K

From: Shayna@myemailaddy.here
To: changed_name@school.edu

LMAO at you girlfriend! Answer this for me. IF it was true that you’d get a new car from Honda just for forwarding an email to a bunch of people - HOW are they going to find you? HOW are they going to know who the heck changed_name@school.edu is? HOW will they get your address to just miraculously show up at your door with the keys to a shiny new car that’s sitting in your parking lot? You slay me. This is NOT true - not even by the wildest stretch of the imagination. LOL

From: changed_name@school.edu
To: Shayna@myemailaddy.here

I am dying with laughter…of course I won’t get a new car in my driveway! But heck fire…who knows!! Okay, tell me gulliable is not it the dictionary! LOL

(Well, it’s not, but…) I give up!

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” - Anne Frank

16

I find it oddly satisfyin when someone sends me a UL with a massive email distribution list. I debunk it and then reply to everyone on the list. In the debunking I suggest that the authore check out snopes before he or she is gullible enough to believe and then send an email to dozens of people.

I have turned several of my friends into UL watchdogs, and they get a sick pleasure out of shutting down the perpetrators.

Gypsy: Tom, I don’t get you.
Tom Servo: Nobody does. I’m the wind, baby.

17

I don’t bother anymore. Several times, I tried to debunk several e-mail chain letter UL’s at work, and ended up insulting a senior partner who believed it was absolutely true. The latest “water-cooler” UL’s at the office are the “JATO-powered-car-into-the-cliff-wall”, and the “spider biting women in the bathroom” ones. When I tried to debunk the JATO one, I ended up insulting a couple people, who I did not realize had been telling others they personally saw on TV the man drive into the cliff. Still, I was able to give a hefty dose of skepticism to my cow-orkers, who now send many e-mail chain letters to me for verification.

Once, after trying to kill an e-mail chain letter (Bill Gates & Disney) I was even reprimanded by an e-mail admin who accused me of spreading the chain.

Just not worth it.

The Prince: “Did you kill Jahamaraj Jah?”
Lady: “Yes.”
The Prince: “My Gods! Why?”
Lady: “His existence offended me.”

18

Our local paper has a column called “Around Town”, written by a woman who keeps track of local events and personalities. She recently asked if anybody knew where she could redeem thousands of aluminum can pop tops to help dialysis patients. A letter with a link to snopes is on my list of things to do.

TT

“It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.”
–James Thurber

19

I spent about two days recently on the Great Gas Out legend…

Back when I was in High School, me and my friends convinced our especially gullible friend that Abraham Lincoln was a conehead (which is why he wore the stovepipe hat).

By the way, this purports to be the true story of the Rocket Car. It might not be true, but it’s a hell of a story!

If Cecil Adams did not exist, we would be obliged to create Him.

20

I usually just kill them off when they come in, but I got the AOL-Intel merger thing two or three times in a week and finally hit the “reply to all” button and sent a message back saying that this is CLASSIC URBAN LEGEND and that it clutters up the airwaves.
I got a message back saying that everybody knows it’s a UL but that people like to feel connected. And when I answered that I prefer to feel connected to people I actually know, the response was that I should just go right on protecting “my” airwaves.
How do you keep these things from proliferating when people KNOW they’re not true and send them anyway?!?