No sooner than I get the car replaced, I go and sit down in front of the computer, and then I’m looking UP at the computer.
WTF?
Reset the height, five minutes later, same issue. @^*&%¿Üà!
I suppose I can’t complain, the chair is pushing twenty years old.
Maybe it just needs more gas. Dung Beetle has some to spare, I believe.
I think I’ll just sit tight today, as it were.
So I just cleared out an abscessed tooth (right upper incisor) that was swelling so bad that it had pushed my nose a little off-center and partially closed my right eye.
I one have one forming now on my lower left bicuspid. Swelling my jaw on that side so that part of my lip droops, making me look like I had a stroke
Your signature seems less than fitting for this post, Superdude. Sorry about your teeth.
I lost another umbrella!
Lost one on Sept. 8 before losing this one. Where did I lose it? Beats me. Two in 2 months. Must be a serious mental problem. Is there a Lost Umbrella Group I can join?
Yes, it’s formed by Anybody Who’s Ever Used An Umbrella.
Are you sure it really got lost, or have you been in the presence of, say, an absent-minded coworker who saw an umbrella sitting around and helped herself, assuming that her daughter had left it behind?
(Based on a true story.)
I’ve been giving blood for 40+ years.
Today they hooked me up to the platelet extractor, and the return wouldn’t work so they shut it down. Only the second time I’ve not given when I’d made it to the blood center (the first was when I had too many skipped heart beats during the mini-physical). To add insult to injury, they also did an extra stick to check my platelet count (it was borderline the last time - they don’t normally need to do that), and they missed the vein the first time (or at any rate that vein wasn’t providing any blood), so needed to do another hole on that arm also (also a first - my veins are usually obnoxiously visible - I wonder if it is the sudden cold snap?).
And, instead of a two-week wait to try again, I’m deferred for 16 weeks since there was no return of red cells and I’ve broached some limit.
My $7000 cat, (last month’s rants) has turned into the farting cat wonder of the world. He has always slept on the pillow by my head. I lay on my side facing him giving him scritches until we both fall asleep.
Last nite he bloomed a silent feline fart so bad, that I slithered to the bottom of the bed, crawled out and turned the light on to see if he’d crapped. Nope. Just a massive sneaky silent wafting across my face fart for the ages.
I am frightened at how pathetic most automobiles are assembled if you actually sit and think about it.
I’ve seen and worked on cars worth 12K to 120K and they all have one thing in common. A single lock nut, or a cotter pin and castle nut, exposed and easily rusted steering knuckles, a brake bleeder screw that can rust or corrode easily to be sheared off, a fuel vapor line inches from an exhaust manifold, tie rod ends with a ball joint that relies purely on weight to stay pretty much intact or 4 threads into the inner tie rod end, tiny plastic clips on wiring harnessed which are exposed and keep things like ABS modules engaged. Not to mention so many with little plastic retainers around tappets on rocker arms, which can shear off, allowing the rocker arm to walk and valve stems to shoot through a valve cover. So many more things that rely on such a tiny piece of flimsy hardware that can be the deciding point whether you live or die. Even if you don’t die/are not injured, dealerships would rather accuse you of violating their warranty somehow instead of admitting they assemble all automobiles for the lowest bidder. Recently seen a slew of Honda Fit vehicles… Axle half shafts just snap in half, even if well kept and rust free. Low grade porous metal that effectively rots from the inside. Japanese, German, American, even a damn Yugo are all the same. Think about that, a nut the size of a nickel with nylon in the inside holding a mission critical, potentially life or death part.
I love cars though, driving, stunting, fixing them, looking at them…but it’s just the truth. Its amazing that people actually purchase New vehicles… underneath they are all the same, and in many cases, aftermarket parts are actually more durable and reliable than what comes from the factory.
In our weekly phone call, my mother has just proclaimed that she accepted Dad’s death (before it happened). Denial isn’t just a river in Egypt, it’s one of the biggest rivers in the world…
On the plus side, you work for people who give enough of a shit to try to help, even if they don’t always get it right. Needing help sucks, but we all do at some point.
Here’s a new one for you:
Yesterday (Friday) I went out to check the mailbox around noon. On my porch were four HUGE insulated zippered bags, each printed with the name of one of those “join our local club and get super premium meat – all organic, pasture-raised, no antibiotic, no growth hormones, heck, maybe gluten and asbestos free – delivered fresh to your door” dealies.
Which is nice and all, except we don’t belong to their club. I was home all morning, and no one had knocked or rung the door bell. It’s like the Meat Fairy just decided to dump what must have been close to 100 pounds of meat on our front porch and sneak away.
There were NO delivery tags/paperwork/whatever attached to any of the bags. Outside of their company name and a logo with a happy looking cow and chickens there was ZERO useful info. Not even a company phone number!
(Why wouldn’t you put a contact number on your delivery bags? Consider it basic advertising. Maybe I was so struck by your happy little cow I would immediately want to call and demand you start slaughtering some for me right away? Huh?)
Anyway, I despise wasting food, and these sorts of things are expensive, and maybe those bags represented some poor family’s meat budget for the quarter or something, so I googled up the company name and found a phone number. Which, miraculously, was answered right away and by a real person. I tell her about the heap’o’meat on my porch.
“Uh.” She says. “Who was it supposed to go to?”
??? How the hell should I know? You’re some boutiquey little meat service. I have told you that four of your bags were delivered to [my address] some time between 8 a.m. and noon today. Check your order records! Check with whatever delivery van was in this area at that time! Sheesh.
Anyway, eventually she accepted I knew nothing useful (and, NO! I was not going to haul the bags in, open them up, try to determine how many pounds of whatever was enclosed.) You want to know what’s in the bags? Ask your employee to check after they pick them back up!
“I’ll take care of it,” she finally said. And hung up, without so much as thanking me for trying to return their stuff, and possibly keep whoever was expecting this stuff from getting mad at their club.
Time passes.
Every now and then I look out a front window: yup, bags still there.
Then I get a phone call about 3:30 p.m. “Hello, this is Mrs. XXXX. [Meat Company] tells me you have my meat.”
Okaaay… Not the most polite opening line, but whatever. “Yep, the meat’s there on my front porch, here’s the address–”
“Oh, they gave me your address. It’s just not convenient for me to come get it right now, my kids are home. Can’t you bring it over? I live at (address with same number and somewhat similar street name.)”
Pause. What the hell? “No. The bags are on the porch. Come and get them. Or tell the company to get them and deliver them properly.”
And then she started whining again about how inconvenient it was, because it was raining so hard and she didn’t want to go out in it…
And she thinks I would like nothing better than to get out in the same damn rain and haul a hundred pounds of meat around for some stranger with entitlement issues???
“Tell you what. You don’t want the meat? Fine, do nothing. If the bags are still there Monday at 7 am. I’ll have my husband haul them down to the street and dump them into the trash bins for you. Good bye!”
The bags were gone when my husband got home around 6:15.
StarvingButStrong:
… :rolleyes: … :D.
How horrible is it that I would have simply considered the grocery shopping was done for the foreseeable future?
I would have assumed my gf ordered it and put it in our refrigerator/freezer/bellies.
Purplehorseshoe, you are going straight to hell. 
Honestly, that was one of the options I considered, especially after I called the company and they were so, well, ungrateful and then the hours passed… And DEFINITELY after I spoke with Mrs. “Deliver my goods, you peasant!”
But, well, A) I was brung up mostly right and the ghosts of my parents would never let me sleep again and B) I know a family who are just getting by, and one of the ways they make it is they make a huge buy of meat at some great discount once or twice a year. For them losing one of their shipments might mean the family eats nothing but beans and rice for six months. 
I’m not a believer in gods, but I do sometimes wonder about the existence of a trickster god; particularly when I see something like StarvingButStrong having 100 pounds of someone else’s meat mistakenly dropped off on their doorstep. It seems like a such a cosmic prank that it makes me wonder if there isn’t a Loki or an Anansi or a Coyote out there behind it all.
Could be. 
But for the joke to really work, we’d have to be vegans or something…