What do you call your kids/what did your parents call you...

First and middle was for being in trouble, and if I was really in trouble, I got the last name too. Only Mom ever did this, with the implication being that I was being so rotten because I was my father’s daughter, hence the (his) last name.

I’ve started calling my kid The Miracle since a conservative candidate sent me a flyer claiming to be pro-life due to childbirth being an Act of God.

God seems to have been stymied by my depo provera shots. He must be losing His Touch.