What do you think are the saddest excuses for a sport?

We got this Australian guy who punts for the football team at the University here. He used to play Aussie Rules Football back home and thought like you did. But then he played the game and he is very glad that 1) he has the equipment on cause “(they) hit hard” and 2) he’s just a punter and not some receiver laying himself out knowing he’s gonna get slammed.

Of course all sports, ALL SPORTS, are wimpy when compared with Shirling. Leave it to the Scots to invent that. shudder

And I agree with the other posters that a sport should have 1) an active competition, 2) objective and well defined goals and 3) require the use of your muscles.

And having watched some of those curling matches in the Olympics I can safely say that there is no way I could get my body to bend in the way some of those players did when tossing those stones.

But the only sports I can regularly watch are baseball and American football.

On American Football, a friend once commented, “They designed a sport where people can hurt each other intentionally, then they have to add in armour. What wimps!”

Golf is not a sport. It is a good walk spoiled (I think Shaw said that).

I am going to have to go with some of the fringe sports. Like Lawn Mower racing. I saw that on tv in Canada and pissed myself laughing. That is a ridiculous sport and very sad.

Or possibly the chainsaw competitions at the local show. Axe mastery is hard, and requires lots of effort, with a chainsaw all you need to do is use it. They look like men who can’t use an axe.

Also hunting/fishing is not sport, for the very simple reason that the other side doesn’t want to play. I have no problem with hunting and fishing for food, but trying to claim it as a sport is just wrong.

Urban Ranger, it was Twain who said “Golf is a good walk spoiled.”

I’m so pissed someone beat me to that quote. It’s the whole reason I came into this thread. Oh well. Good taste, Urban. :smiley:

I’m currently walking around with a huge bruise right below my knee from slamming into the ice several times last wednesday (tiny errors in judgment while sweeping), and yes, curling is dorky.
Fun, but dorky.
Nowhere near as lame as golf, though.

bullfighting, dog fighting, cock fighting…see a trend?
I don’t get upset over much anything people want to do as long as they leave the animals out of it.
People, at least, make their own choices to put themselves in danger.

Auto racing.

Like the line about NASCAR being an acronym for







Hey, the car does the work. The skill involved is considerable, but that doesn’t make it a sport.


Otherwise I pretty much* agree with George Carlin’s opinions.

[sub]*Meaning, “except for his use of slurs.”[/sub]

Professional Bowling. Bowling is fun, sure. But pro bowling? Come on…

  • You’re indorrs, so there’s no weather to compensate for.

  • You and the target are always put in the same place, so there’s no motion to compensate for.

  • No one or thing is trying to prevent you from hitting the target.

  • You bring your own equipment, so you don’t worry about that.

So it’s essentially watching people take the exact same show over and over. No wonder it’s always strikes and spares.

That new Olympic spectator “sport”…


Feel free to try it yourself.

New snake!

The sport whose mere existence angers me is ice dancing.

Just because it’s hard, does not mean it’s a sport.

I second the above votes for anything judged- a popularity contest, not a sport. I’m not knocking the effort, talent, etc. required to be a figure skater, or a rhythmic gymnast, but neither is a sport.

Also, NASCAR, CART, Formula 1, are all not sports- hard, and I can’t do them, and give credit to those who can, but not sports.

I have serious doubts about baseball, also…

While I agree with your sentiments, ianzin, I’d have to toss in another variable into the equation, and that’s the difference between competitive and noncompetitive sports.

Is rock-climbing a sport? Sure it is, even though it’s just you against the rock. But it’s not a competitive sport. Similarly, gymnastics, which you mention, isn’t naturally a competitive sport, and judges don’t fix that. But it is a sport in the same manner that rock-climbing is.

I’d also aver that “I’d like to see you do it” has little if any place in debating what is, and what isn’t, a sport. Golf is a lame sport not because it isn’t a tough game, or because it doesn’t involve the use of physical skill and prowess - it is, and it does, and I can’t golf worth shit. But the reality is that golf is deadly boring, unless the bug has bitten you. Besides, there’s just something wrong about a sport where they shush the spectators.

Anything that involves the use of a ball. Men seem to love to kick them around.

I conceded skill even in the passage quoted. I can’t go out and win a Tony on Broadway. Does that making acting a sport?

What is auto racing if it isn’t a sport? Genuinely curious. It meets stankow’s standards:

Physical activity? Yes. The car does not “do all the work,” (although it certainly helps to have the best equipment money can buy thanks to your rich multiple-car-owning team owner). If the car “did all the work” then Jerry Nadeau would’ve been winning as much as Jeff Gordon when he drove for Rick Hendrick’s team.
Opposition? Yes. There are 42 other people on the track in a NASCAR race all directly opposed to the idea of you winning.
Objective standards? Yes. The scoring procedure gets a little widgey when you try to figure out how the points are allocated but the standards are objective. You cross the finish line first and you car’s pieces all fit the rules? You win.

So seriously, what is it if it isn’t a sport?

I’d also like to note that my “I’d like to see you do it” comment was not in response to whether or not NASCAR is a sport, which has nothing at all to do with whether any one person in particular is capable of doing it, but rather in response to the assertion that the car does all the work.

racinchikki- I’m not entirely sure what auto racing is. It’s like horse racing- one’s ability to win/succeed/etc. is based largely upon the performance of the equipment. (horse or car)

For instance, if you are a fantastic jockey, and are riding a broken-down horse, then more likely than not you will not win. Certainly, your skill as a jockey comes into play, but in large part, it’s about the horse.

Isn’t the same the case in auto racing? If you are a fantastic driver, with the reflexes of a cat on crystal meth, but you don’t have the financial backing to have the top car, more likely than not you will not win.

The same can’t be said for basketball, or soccer- the quality of the shoes, or the ball, all Nike commercials notwithstanding, doesn’t really matter- it’s about your fitness level, and innate ability.

Again- doesn’t mean auto racing isn’t hard, or that I wouldn’t turn myself into a red smear if I tried it, it’s just not a sport.


stankow’s standards make war a sport.