What happens if you applied to sue a non-human or otherwise inanimate object?

Factual Questions
1

What would happen if one was to apply to sue for something, except it wasn’t another person or a company, but more rather a non-human or otherwise inanimate object? I’m asking this because I remember browsing Yahoo! Answers one evening because I was bored and reading a question which got deleted before it got any meaningful answers asking what would happen if one was to sue the moon! WTF?!?! :confused::eek:

So what would the exact consequences be if I was to for example sue a lamp post out in the street? Would there be any penalities issued for causing waste of time etc?

2

The most imaginative one I remember off hand was where a guy tried to sue Satan. The judge dismissed for lack of jurisdiction. That’s some funny shit right there.

3

It happened in the Middle Ages in Western Europe that animals were sued in court. I would guess they generally killed the poor things whether they were convicted or not.

4

Isn’t that the principle behind civil forfeiture?
They don’t need probable cause because they are arresting the money/car/house/etc rather than you?

5

It is possible to sue a corporation.

6

In the US, you don’t “apply” to sue someone (or something) you just file the Complaint. As others have noted, the government sues money and assets in forfeiture actions. In some maritime cases the defendant is the vessel. Generally, though, if you sued a lamppost, you’d have a hard time establishing proof of service and your case would be thrown out eventually. Or there would be no Answer, and you’d win.

7

How do you establish proof of service on a boat or a pile of money?

8

There is something called in rem jurisdiction which results in such fascinating case names as:

United States v. Forty Barrels and Twenty Kegs of Coca-Cola
United States v. 11 1/4 Dozen Packages of Articles Labeled in Part Mrs. Moffat’s Shoo-Fly Powders for Drunkenness
United States v. Ninety-Five Barrels Alleged Apple Cider Vinegar
United States v. One Book Called Ulysses
* United States v. Thirty-seven Photographs*
United States v. Approximately 64,695 Pounds of Shark Fins
United States v. 50 Acres of Land
United States v. 12 200-ft. Reels of Film
United States v. $124,700 in U.S. Currency

State governments can also get in on this sort of thing, leading to Quantity of Books v. Kansas and One 1958 Plymouth Sedan v. Pennsylvania.

9

Besided IN REM as mentioned, here is the federal rule, who can sue and be sued;

There was a man who sued GOD a few years back, of course it was dismissed.

I sued my brain for non support and won!

10

Like a carbon rod?

11

There’s always that famous Jamaican case, R. v. One Dead Man’s Chest, yo ho ho and a Bottle of Rum.

12

So, let’s say you win your suit against the lamp post. Then what? How are you going to collect damages?

13

It’s not just a carbon rod, it’s an inanimate carbon rod.

14

smashy smashy