What have you been mistaken for?

I’ve been mistaken for a person who is a lot cooler and “with it” than I actually am. I guess visually I fit the “cool person profile”, at least from a distance. But once you start talking to me, the truth quickly becomes evident.

Back when I was in college, I had a couple encounters with guys that terminated with them stepping away from slowly, visibly disturbed by something I’d said.

Because, for whatever reason, I don’t sound like most of the people I grew up with, my “accent” has been placed at everywhere from Michigan to England to Russia (never mind that natives of those places sound nothing alike).

I’m always surprised at how many people I’ve known for a while don’t realize I’m gay and mistake me for straight. I’ve always assumed I was kind of obvious.

I’ve been mistaken for a Satanist (because I did have an interest in the occult so I was able to answer some co-workers questions, but far from practicing it I found Satanism [in the Geraldo Rivera ‘Satanic Panic’ sense] to be one of the few religions stupider than Fundamentalist Christianity)

And I couldn’t estimate to the zillionth how many times I’ve been mistaken for a store employee when I’m shopping. I apparently look solicitous.

I thought you were getting paid now?
When I wore my hair really short, I got “sir” a couple of times from people behind desks who hadn’t really looked up before speaking.

In my twenties I occasionally got mistaken for a fourteen-year-old boy. (‘A very *beautiful *fourteen-year-old boy,’ one guy hurried to add, in case I was offended.)

Now I mainly get mistaken for someone who gives a shit whether your sister got one more raisin than you did.

Cop and/or firefighter. Used to happen all the time when I was young[er].

But I cannot tell you guys the number of times people have said to me: “I know this guy, and he looks exactly like you. Man, he could be your twin!!” I guess I have any number of doppelgängers out there. In fact, one said person is someone I actually know fairly well, and whenever we meet up we have a discussion about whose turn it is to be “the evil twin”.

That I get all the time. All big guys with a beard look identical.

Maybe the beard is the reason I’m never mistaken for a store employee.

I’ve been mistaken for a doctor simply because I was walking around a hospital in a lab coat with a stethoscope hanging from my neck.

When I was a substitute teacher, I was sometimes mistaken for a student, despite the fact that few elementary school students wear high heels, a suit, and a Phi Beta Kappa pin.

Also, on my honeymoon, a Disney hostess at one of their restaurants mistook me for a Disney entertainer.

I often have been mistaken for somebody else. It gives me a chance to dust off Tom McCahill’s line, “They say Grandpa really got around when he had that motor scooter.”

You’re right.

Starting May.

Tony Serico on many occasions, I have been comped at Vegas and Hollywood shows and escorted right to the front row several times. For the record I see little resemblance.

Something else that I find strange is that I am often mistaken for a hitman or leg breaker. I have had more job offers than I can count. I would often have drinks bought for me just so I wouldn't cause trouble. I am probably the least violent most peaceful person you will ever meet.

Hispanic. As a teen, I was twice chided for not speaking Spanish because I was embarrassed about my heritage. Not the only two times I’ve been mistaken for being Hispanic, but those stand out. Never mind that I’m American to parents who were born in America, and one set of grandparents and great-grandparents born in America.

If looking back beyond my American heritage, I’m 1/2 Sicilian on my father’s side, and my mother’s side is very mixed, mostly black (though no idea from where, other than wherever it was, it wasn’t willingly) and Native American (mostly Cherokee).

Another one who made this mistake. I ran out quickly on my lunch to pick up a few things. An older lady asked me where a certain item was and being a nice guy who knew where it was I told her. She then asked me if I could take her there and show her. I told her that if she could wait until I found what I was looking for I would. That is when she started huffing and puffing, telling me I was rude and demanding to see my manager. That is about the time the light bulb went off and also fortunately about the time a real manager happened to walk by. She was still ranting to him as I found my item and walked off.

Someone who can afford to fly to Comic-Con.

When I was twenty five I was having coffee in a mall before I had a client visit nearby. I was a home care aide. I was wearing polyester elastic waist pants and a white blouse with red pinstripes. Totally stylin’. (NOT!)

I had a man in some kind of uniform come up to me and ask if I knew what time it was. I said it was about 1:45. He then asked what a Mr Someone or other would say if he knew I was there. I had no idea and said so.

Well after getting called “Missy” and so forth I finally realized this man was a truant officer trying to take me back to a nearby high school.

After that I left and stopped at the pharmacy where my aunt worked. I was wearing My uniform had only red and white stripes while the store uniform was nearly identical except for a blue pinstripe in the work shirt. I then got chewed out by another store clerk for bothering the pharmacist. The clerk thought I was a new trainee.

I loved the job but I hated the uniform. I always have looked young for my age. … I was carded about 90% of the time until I was 30 and about 1/2 the time until I was 40.

I’m apparently a dead ringer for an actor in Anchorage, AK. People would come up to me and say “Hi, Dave!” Nope, sorry.

“Dave’s not here.”

Some lady’s boyfriend.

I was at a restaurant. At the bar, I’m standing there waiting for my party’s table. Suddenly, some lady sneaks up behind me, wraps her arms around me as she nuzzled her face into my back.

Stunned, I turned around. She screamed, then I screamed, and then we both laughed after we figured out what the mix up was.

During nursing school clinicals, students review the charts of their assigned patients the evening before clinicals. I got mistaken for a doctor by other doctors several times while doing that.

I like to say I have one of the Seven Standard Faces, because I’ve been mistaken for someone else so many times.