Different question: I’m getting a notification that I have a response from “Oscar” but it directs me to Somethingwitty1. Anyone know why that is? Did SW1 perchance change their username and the system hasn’t completely caught up?
Click Somethingwitty’s username on any post, and you’ll see that they have Oscar listed as their “human name”.
My name is Oscar. Weird I usually get notifications from peoples user names.
Buddy. Your sample need was for a word to replace the quotes in:
As I said before, you don’t need a word for that.
Mostly if you’re going on a date the word you need is “person,” but you may need a word for gender expression (“man” or “woman”) if that’s important to you.
You might even, depending on context, need a word to describe your date’s gender expression in relationship to their genitals, although that should be rare. We have words for “gender expression female, female genitals” and “gender expression male, female genitals.”
But you NEVER need a word to say, "I’m going on a date with someone, their gender is unimportant, but let me tell you about their crotch!"
All your denials about how you’re super not transphobic aren’t really here or there, as long as you’re insisting you need a word that tells nothing about a person except what’s in their undies.
I think the default is human name == user name. Unless someone has changed it in their profile (profile >> preferences >> account >> name box at the bottom), you’ll see their username for both.
Not really. Cisgendered means you were assigned a gender at birth that seems to correspond to your genitalia, and you have no problem with it, all is in congruence as far as you’re concerned. Note that this might actually be in conflict with your genetic sex assignment.
Transgendered means you were assigned a gender at birth that, while it might seem to correspond to your genitalia, is actually NOT correct and you don’t agree with it. Your assigned gender and your own internal gender identity are NOT in congruence.
Note that intersexed persons occur naturally in about 1 in every 2500 births so trying to assign gender at birth based on apparent genitalia is a mug’s game and even a doctor can be quite mistaken if they don’t do any DNA testing to figure out what the apparent gender assignment from birth “ought” to be.
And at no time aside from deciding whether or not to have sex and/or coparent with someone else is the state of your genitalia actually germane to, well, anything.
So is sex, or genitals at birth, different from gender?
I feel like I’m 99% agreeing with people but we aren’t quite on the same page.
Yes. Sex is what you were assigned at birth based on your genitalia. Gender is more of a social construct decided on by the individual. Some prefer assigned sex to just sex, and it’s not 100% universal, but in general, yes, sex and gender are different.
Thats all I’m saying. The terminology we use isn’t consistent.
I understand that, and I think most of the heat you’re getting here comes from the really bad example you used:
Unless there’s a really good reason to do otherwise, almost everyone would just say “man” or “woman” or “guy” or “lady” there. What assumptions are made about that would be inferred by your dating history and the people you’re talking to.
Well OK
I do think a lot of the heat I’m getting is because it was initially assumed I was a trans phobe. And maybe I should have worded things better.
But hardly anyone agrees with anyone else ( not alone me). Which only strengthens my conviction that we don’t know or even have come close to agreeing on what words to use.
As someone for whom trans issues aren’t my primary concern, I’d like to use the proper terms, but its confusing. And frankly this thread hasn’t helped much. Ardent Pro Trans people don’t agree. So what chance do I have?
Do women wear pads and tampons all the time, or only during menstruation, or what?
Did anyone who has disagreed with in this thread, feel the need to correct the OP or any other poster in this thread? Or did you just accept the colloquial usage of the terms women, girls, females.
Again, context is key. Women and menstruation used together clarifies.
You could argue that not all women menstruate or that some non-women menstruate, but in most cases, I’d say that that’s splitting unnecessary hairs.
Trans women are women, but trans women are not cis women. Acknowledging this difference is not transphobic, and I’m unaware of any sentiment otherwise within the community of trans people or trans allies.
What is the difference? Why are there two different types of women?
And why am a trans phobe for agreeing with you?
In my understanding, trans women are women who were not assigned female at birth (and/or women whose gender identity does not match their assigned/biological sex). Cis women are women who were assigned female at birth (and/or women whose gender identity does match their assigned/biological sex).
There are countless “types” of women.
Who says you are?
Because some women face great struggles in a male-dominated world. And some women face even greater struggles in a cis-dominated world.
Everybody who has responded to this thread…
Are cis-woman and Tran-woman the same thing, and if so, why do you use 2 different words for them?
The OP can correct me if I’m wrong (by explaining their actual motivation), but their posts in this thread feel like an attempt to lead up to a “gotcha!” whereby people with tolerant/progressive views on sex and gender can be called out for inconsistency - as in, we might concede “it’s okay to ask whether women approach menstruation in such-and-such a way,” because context helps sort what is meant by women, but we then might insist on referring to pregnant “people” rather than pregnant “women” in a different context.
I guess that could be considered inconsistent, but let’s face it - on a societal level, terminology and attitudes are in flux right now. Inconsistencies will arise. Seeking out those inconsistencies merely in order to triumphantly call out people who are just trying to be inclusive and accepting is not a worthy endeavor.
Yes, it’s possible to find some inconsistencies. And? What matters is that we find ways to treat all people with respect. If people are being damaged by certain types of language, then by all means we want to fix that language. Obsessing on carefully teased out inconsistencies for no reason except to complain doesn’t make sense.
That’s all I want to hear.