What makes a car a "beater"?

Inspired by this thread, Mom drives nice car, Dad drives the old beater- true in your family?

I am curious what your definition of “beater” is. Is it age alone? Condition alone? Condition + age?

One poster mentions his 2006 car is the beater in the family, which surprised me. Of course, I don’t know what kind of shape it is in. It seems too new to be a beater to me. Despite having a 2004 and a 2008 in our family, I would not consider either of them beaters. Both are in excellent shape inside and out.

I think it’s a psychological distinction rather than a concrete one. A beater is a car that is old, ugly and inexpensive enough that you consider it beneath you and don’t care if it gets damaged. That line varies based on the other cars a person has access to. That is my understanding of the distinction.

I think the clearest definition is that the used car market has some odd things. There are cars for sale that run, and will get you from point A to point B. They may have a bumper held on with duct tape, but they work.

The weird thing is, if your current old car gets an expensive problem, it’s actually cheaper to buy a beater than to fix an old car. Similarly, when a beater dies, it’s often cheaper to buy another one. As such, there is little point in doing more than minimal maintenance on a beater, or bothering to fix anything wrong with it that doesn’t prevent it from driving.

“Beaters” also can sometimes run for months or years with “quirks”, such as not being able to start it under some conditions, or not being able to shift to certain gears, or being forced to drive fast because the fan isn’t working, etc. Despite these “verge of failure” problems, they continue to run and get the driver places.

Basically, with a beater, the car’s terminally ill. It is just a matter of time before the car’s worn out engine or transmission fails completely, or some other expensive part gives up. At that point, you might as well sell it to a wrecking yard and buy another terminally ill car.

This means that there’s no point in fixing the paint, or the seats, or the bumper, or the bodywork, or even replacing the battery and tires. This is because the moment the engine/transmission dies, your investment will be wasted. *

So the car looks like it got beaten up and rode like no one cares about it.

  • If you could afford to pay to repair all that stuff, you would have purchased a new car or a lightly used one.

Some commonalities of a “beater” (or a hoopty as we used to call them) are:

[ol]
[li]SIgnificant external body damage - Rust, dents, poor Bondo repairs,missing parts,etc[/li][li]An exhaust system which is poorly maintained or not maintained at all - The louder, the better.[/li][li]An interior which meets or exceeds the level of crapiness exhibited by the exterior - Bonus points for ripped back seat as wellas front seat upholstery. Extra bonus points for rusted holes in floorboards.[/li][li]Windshield cracks - Any size or length. Bonus points for rear window cracking.[/li][li]Fluid leakage - Any fluid. Bonus points for multiple fluid leaks.[/li][li]Bald tires - Best if front and rear tires are completely mismatched (whitewalls and black walls for example)[/li][li]Unwashed[/li][/ol]

A list of non-standard things you need to tell anyone who borrows the car. Such as:

[ol]
[li]To turn on the parking lights you need to hit the dashboard right on the Chiquita banana sticker[/li][li]The gas tank door doesn’t shut, but this duct tape holds it in place[/li][li]You get the idea …[/li][/ol]

If the list is more than three items, it’s a beater.

Beaters don’t have/need parking lights. However, you usually have to drive with only the high beams on because one or both of your lows are out, and you don’t want to risk a defect ticket, the bane of beaters.

Often times an apparent beater can be a gem of a transportation car and might even clean up fairly well. I have bought several over the years that I drove for a few years and sold for more than I paid for them with only minimal maintenance. Dirty interior and oxidized paint will often be a tip off to a car that might just need a tune up and an oil change. 5 years ago I bought my girlfriend a 1992 toyota that had 125,000 miles on it for $500.00. Needed a muffler, a detail a side view mirror and spark plugs. I spent about $300.00 on it she drove it for 3 years and I sold it for $1400 still running great.

In the beater, the low beams DO work, you just have to pull over and give the front bumper/nose one or two swift kicks. You learn this quirk the night you need to drive the Nj turnpike home and punch the front of the car in anger when you realize the lights are not working.
All fixed! :slight_smile:
Once you start to open the hood and double check for all connected questionable wires and ground before you get in to go anywhere in the dark, iit is no longer a beater but reliable transportation.

Such cars are typically a teen’s first car or were owned by someone who didn’t care about it as long as it started… and when it didn’t, or J. Teen had scraped together enough for his kewl ride, it got sold fast and cheap. If it’s merely neglected and not burned out, it can be, as you say, an excellent buy.

I had a coworker who claimed to never spend more than $500 for a car, and never pay a dime in maintenance. He would buy a car, drive it until something failed (typically six months to a year), and buy a new one. He paid license transfer fees instead of maintenance.

I like that definition. I think I’d include exactly 3 items as a beater, but I agree that “how many special instructions do you need” is a pretty good metric. Or also “just doesn’t work.”

Like, the door locks just don’t work. Only the left speaker works on the stereo. The passenger seat can’t be adjusted. At all.

Stuff like that.

My 69 VW pop top had no reverse.

I did not consider it a beater. I considered it a challenge.

“Sometimes, adjusting the seat belt will make the back of the driver’s seat fall flat into the back seat.”

****I have a 1990 Volvo 740GL station wagon.

Problems:

Check engine light on for the past 4 years.
Driver seat leather ripped and falling apart.
Sun roof - must hold thingie (?) down in order to close properly.
Various lights stop working (repeatedly) even after replacing bulbs.
Liner coming out of roof here and there.
Pulls strongly to the right.
Whistling sound coming from the heat vents. I don’t even hear it anymore because I’m so used to it. Sad, but true.
Radiator overflow valve pops out intermitendly.
Rear wiper doesn’t work properly.

Engine - strong as a…um…Sweed on performance enhancing drugs!

Question: is my car considered a “beater?” I don’t know, but I do know that I want a new/used one! Soon!

I prefer my scooters to my stupid Volvo any day. Why won’t it die?!!!

when you have to leave the windows down to get in and out of the car, because the doors don’t work, that is a sure sign that you should do flexibility exercises so to get in and out without injury.

That reminds me of my old 1961 Mercury Comet. Half the windows were held up with shims of wood. It needed a carpenter as much as a mechanic.

LOL!
Yes! This is what came to my mind when I first read the op.

It’s a beater if parts are made of wood. Especially pine.

And it’s not actually a woodie.

The car I drive to work is a beater. It’s a 1998 Ford Escort wagon with 210,000 hard miles. I paid $500 cash for it. It never goes on the interstate or above 55 mph (I think, it’s got a bouncing speedometer, so I have a 10 mph range) I only use it for my 15-mile round trip commute, 4 days a week. I got towing with AAA and $200 for repairs. If a repair bill is $201, I will scrap it and get another cheap ride.

I have been married for 12 years, so I don’t have to impress anyone :slight_smile: