I brought in a lava lamp today to spruce up my cubical, but I sit under an AC vent so it’s having a hard time warming up :(. I also have the X-Files “I want to believe” poster, and a cheap foam 4" penguin with a pen stuck through his belly (there’s a story to that). There’s also the assorted wedding pics, certificates, and a million postits.
**NOTHING! IT’S EXACLY LIKE EVERY OTHER CUBICLE ON THE FRIGGIN’ PLANET!!
SHOOT ME! SHOOT ME NOW!!!**
Sorry. I got a little worked up, there.
Let’s see, I’ve got a cute little cartoon on the wall and my very own coffee cup.
Ooops, that kind of goes toward my original theory.
Nevermind me. I guess I just have a case of “the Mondays”[sup]1[/sup].
[sup]1[/sup]Yes, this is an Office Space reference – I’m not that big of a wonk.
I have a golden pothos plant named Audrey III. She’s about ten months old (from the date I purchased her from the nursery, that is) and now has a vinespan of nigh-onto 30 feet. She’s taken over the cubicle shelf, the wall, the ceiling, and my coworker’s cubicle next to me.
Someday I swear I’ll get a picture up to demonstrate Audrey’s phenomenal growth.
The bookshelf is sort of different, too; the half that isn’t covered by Audrey has SQL in a Nutshell, Java Examples in a Nutshell, Java in a Nutshell, Java Fundamental Classes Reference, Teach Yourself Java in 21 Days, and then the non-work-related texts of Last Things: Death and the Apocalpyse in the Middle Ages, The Friars, Niccolo’s Smile, Lies My Teacher Told Me, and The Dilbert Principle.
A honking big jar of wrapped candy, four pound containers each of red vines and licorice whips plus a large tin of Jacob’s Cream Crackers. Each Wednesday I bring in fresh baked cinnamon bread from Greenlee’s Bakery to tide us over between the free doughnuts and bagels on Monday and Friday mornings.
Let’s see…the Kurt Cobain collage (75% of the pics show him smiling), the Hardy Boyz bulletin board, the wrestling action figures (two sets of Hardyz, Triple H, Austin and Jericho), the easter basket full of stress balls (a standard foam one, one filled with goo,one the lights up with you bounce it, a magic eight ball and a mini nerf football), the Salt Lake City Winter Games 2002 coffee mug filled with candy, and much, much more
Maybe it’s the darling precious 5" x 7" litho of an orange tabby cat in a blue tutu, standing upright, arms outstretched, extending his right hind leg in a funny-yet-cute ballet move. The cat is drawn in an entirely lifelike way… it looks like a real cat, not a cartoon.
(Even funnier to me is that the tutu is decidedly feminine, and most orange tabbies are male… so I crack up every time I see the picture!)
I have a large picture of Mr T that i ripped out of a magazine hanging up. It was a 1-800 COLLECT full page ad, but I cut the top third of the picture off, so it’s just him making a fist at the camera. In the corner, I drew a cartoon word-bubble in magic marker…“Go to the gym after work, Rose!!” is what he says.
Everytime someone comes to talk to me in my cube, I catch them glancing at him.
I also have a stuffed monkey that sits on my monitor. Sometimes, I punch him.
I don’t have a cubicle at work, but my mother’s cubicle is an interesting sight. Besides the random toys and stuffed animals and various books she thought were interesting (she works at a library), she’s organized the cubicle for nicely balanced feng shui. (This seems to unsettle her Chinese boss who firmly does not believe in such things)
She also has a picture I took of her latest tattoo, just after it was inked. It seems to throw some people off. Can’t imagine why.
I am the only Notre Dame fan in this entire depraved office
Large shamrocks, plastic ND football helmets, and stuffed Fightin’ Irish leprecauns litter my workspace. Some dickhead placed a little plastic Nebraska Cornhuskers helmet in my Fightin’ Irish candy dish today. Fuckin’ barbarians.
My office is the only one in the suite with TWO doors. When I am not there, or at lunch, it can be used as a pass-through. Sometimes I come in and start working without my light on and someone will whip through thinking I’m gone and then have to prostrate themselves to me in forgiveness for trespassing.
It’s by far the messiest in the entire building.
And not only does it have a huge Kermit poster and about 10,000 snapshots of Cranky Jr, it also has a large paper chicken that was ripped out of a pop-up book. It just sits there, in mid-squawk, clinging without explanation to my bookcase.
As with Cranky, I have an office, that they’re talking about making even bigger. It won’t add to the personality. The only thing I have on the walls (and there are lots of things on the walls) that isn’t directly related to the search that is my working life is a bumper sticker a friend of mine’s company made.
It segues from a photo of a drilling rig on the left to a shot of an F-16 dropping four iron bombs on the right and says, “Drill wells…not Iraquis.”
I have, in the past, let a stock photo of a happy family that comes with the picture frame reside in my office, just to give the appearance of there being personal effects on hand. I do have a small personal library of tech books on hand.