What should I do with my life? (Amazingly long)

I don’t know what to do with my life. I was hoping you could help.

Let me tell you a bit about myself. I’m going to be very honest here; I really need some outside perspective on what I can, or should, be doing. If you feel like slogging through all this and pointing me in a direction which seems like it might make me happy, I’d appreciate it. All questions will be answered as promptly as possible.

The Brief Biography

I was born, then shortly thereafter my father died. My mom, left with scant inheritance and three young children, did what she could to keep us fed. Specifically, she worked at the White House. Unfortunately, she could have chosen a better administration to join up with; shortly before a certain resignation hit the news, my mom realized that there was about to be a political shitfest, and she’d be in the middle of it. So she did the obvious; she packed us up and moved to Spain. We spent five years in the land of Franco, learning to be bilingual and wandering about.

After that, Florida. Then Ireland. Then Rhode Island, where I spent my junior high and high school years. I was a good student when I was interested, and a bad one when I was bored. Oh, except for Spanish class; somehow, that teacher managed to knock all knowledge of the Spanish language right out of me. Solamente hablo un poco, these days.

Now, at this point, we weren’t very well off; that affected my choice of colleges. That, and the guidance counselor who had determined that I was retarded, no matter what my ACT and SAT scores said. Rhode Island College. State school. Double major in English and Film. Extra-useful. Especially since I was pretty much paying for everything myself. Once again, my level of interest directly correlated to my grade.

Then I took a year off, and discovered the real world of apartments, menial jobs, and towards the end of the year, drugs. Pot, hallucinogenics, and booze. When I went back to school, I was stoked for some serious philosophy, man. Yeah.

You saw this one coming; dropped out after another year, about two semesters short of graduating, if I’d ever really focused on anything. Spent a while doing the menial job/apartment thing, until (I kid you not) the voice of God told me to leave. Like most divine revelations, this one lacked specificity, and so with little to go on, I packed things up, got stuff in order, and followed a vague notion to Peterborough, Ontario. Where I stayed for a month, soaking in the culture, and realizing that I had no idea what I was doing.

I wandered south again, worked as a dishwasher on an island off the coast of Rhode Island, redundantly enough, until I met a lunatic who wanted to wander off again. We stocked up on drugs, bought an old car, and headed, I think, south.

A few days later, I think, I woke up in the parking lot of a Renaissance Festival. Where I found shelter, work, friends, and most importantly, a sense of community that I’d been missing my whole life. I did Ren Fests for five years. I did everything; carpentry, craft work, puppetteering, juggling, street vendor, booth hawker. I was good; I drew a crowd when I wanted to, and made people laugh. It was a blast. A great five years.

Eventually, though, I’d done everything that I was interested in, and I wanted out. I knew a guy in Tucson who made puppets, and worked a deal where he’d use me to staff a booth in a local mall selling them. Great puppets, by the way. The guy who made them, however, was psychotic. Anyway, after a couple of months, I ended up still in Tucson, living in a teeny little apartment, working as a window washer.

Now, during the Ren Fest days, I’d finished a major construction project, and gotten myself a computer. Leading Edge, if that means anything to the grizzled tech geeks out there. One meg of non-expandable RAM, 20 meg hard drive, DOS 6.22, and a lethargic modem. Oh, and one of those snazzy new CD-ROM drives. I’d get stoned and play around with batch files in DOS, making the system do funky things, and I’d wander about on BBSes in the long evenings when I was wondering what I was doing with my life.

As things turn out, the entrepreneurial pair who owned the window washing business were computer-minded folk, with little knowledge of computers. They had paid a guy an outrageous sum, in the tens of thousands, to make them an Access 2.0 database with which to keep track of customers, billing, routing, and reporting. And, due to their consultant not understanding the nature of relational databases, the whole thing crapped out as soon as they got a repeat customer, and the consultant, understandably enough, was nowhere to be found.

So the bosses came to me, and asked me if I could take a look at it. I had messed about a bit with Q&A, a primitive database program, and I much preferred the idea of sitting in an air conditioned office playing with a computer to going out and washing windows in hundred degree heat, so I said sure. And in a few afternoons, I had their database up and running again.

Which led to some more reports. And some more forms, and some more queries, and I began to really enjoy the sensation of power that came with being in the lovely office, while my boss was out washing windows in my place. It was about the time when I realized that the database was pretty much finished off, when the guy who worked next door wandered in. It seems the bosses had been bragging about their database guy, and he had some Access problems he wanted to talk about…

That was how it was in the early 90s. I had a knack, and there were tech jobs everywhere. I never did take any classes, never got a certification, I just showed people what I was capable of, and that was that. I bounced around from job to job for a bit, got ahead, got a nicer place, got a better computer. And then… AOL.

I worked for AOL for a year, for a steady paycheck and a set of stock options. And I got the options, after that year, a few grand. By which time, I was batshit crazy. That place is hell to work for, and my pot smoking kept getting worse and worse. I gave up smoking with other people, became more withdrawn and paranoid, and after I quit AOL on my one-year anniversary, spent a few months as a recluse, smoking myself into oblivion. Cable TV, internet connection, a pound of weed in the fridge, and I was good. Only went out at night, of course, and didn’t talk to anyone for weeks.

Wow, this is getting confessional. Still with me? I think this is all relevant; if you’re going to help me figure out where I go next, I think you should know where I’ve been first. Anyway…

Eventually, the money ran out, and with a big pile of weed still left but no money to pay the rent, I found a Narcotics Anonymous chat room on IRC. Saith the newbie: “Does marijuana qualify as a narcotic?” After an evening typing with sober people who knew where I was coming from, I hit my first meeting the next evening. Did 90 meetings in 90 days, got a job, got the landlord to hold off on evicting me, and threw away all my dope and paraphrenalia. That’ll have been eight years ago this July.

Clean, sober, and in the best tech market ever, I continued to move up. Better jobs, better pay, better circumstances, until once I had reached a job with the most stable employer in the state (the state itself, of course) where I was happy and well-paid and well-liked and wanted to stay there forever…

I got laid off.

For the past few months, I’ve been soaking up the unemployment checks, taking courses in programming, and wondering what the hell I’m gonna do with myself. Which has been fun, but all good things must come to an end. Which brings us, pretty much up to date. I’ve got a couple of months worth of academic unemployment left, and then I’m on the market again. But… which market?

So, what?

So, now I find that my career of ten years is gone, never to return. Yeah, I know, the tech market might pick up again sometime, and there will be computer places hiring, and geeks everywhere will rejoice. But I think I’m pretty much out of the running. For people like me, who just had the knack, but no formal training or certification, and who never really made it much past hardware jockey, there’s no place left. Or at least no place good. Especially since, let’s face it, I was never a really great computer guy to start with; I was a good computer guy, with good social skills, which let me communicate well about computers. But they never were my lifelong passion, and I never got the fundamentals that come with having a formal education in the subject. So I bid my old career goodbye, and look forward to my next one, whatever it may be.

Which brings us, at long, long last, to my point.

About freaking time!

Tell me about it. I had to type all of this.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, so what does this washed-up ex-hippy-druggy guy have to offer a prospective employer? What makes him think he’s worthy of a job that doesn’t involve the phrase “Do you want fries with that?” And you’re thinking, why doesn’t he shut up already?

We’re almost through. At least I think we are. We’ve gotten to the point where I explain what I can do, which comes just before you all suggest what I can do with it. Ready?

Skills, qualifications, abilities, etcetera

First off, I’m a nice guy. I make people laugh, put them at ease, settle conflicts, solve problems, and create peace and harmony wherever I go. Pretty much. But I am good with people; I can talk to anybody, about anything, for however long. In the words of Maude, “They’re my species.”

As a side effect of the above, I can sell things like freaking crazy. I’ve never been in a retail position where I wasn’t the top salesperson of all the people in the business. I had one boss pull me aside back when I was hawking food at Ren Fests, to show me a couple of graphs he’d printed from his Excel spreadsheet. He lined them up; for every trough in one, there was a crest in the other. He pointed to the crests, and told me that whichever booth I was at, that was always the top booth in sales for the day, by a long shot. He was a great boss.

I’ve sold everything from pretzels to computers, and had a good time doing so. For the most part. I tend to burn out of retail positions after a year or so; I like people, but it’s draining to do that sort of thing full time.

I’m also a decent craftsman. I’ve made pottery, rocking horses, puppets, jewelry, leatherwork… pretty much anything that would pay during the week at the festivals. I got a reputation as a reliable producer of quality work, and was at one point considered to be the second-best bamboo flute decorator in the US. Really. Currently I paint miniatures, play guitar, sew, and cook. Jobs where I’ve spent lots of time working with my hands are the ones I remember most fondly. I really miss that.

My computer skills aren’t excellent, but they’re way above average. I’m a good hardware tech, troubleshooter, maintenance guy, and computer tutor. Networking skills are pretty much up to a small office level; enterprise level stuff leaves me in the dust. I do Access development off and on, and am currently working on exploring the .Net platform, with an emphasis on C#. Not great at it yet, but I catch on quick.

I also came up with some decent web pages in my time as a web designer. Keep in mind, though, that this was back in the days when a web page meant HTML, and not much else. But my photoshop skills are still pretty sharp, and I know how to make things look good on the screen.

My writing either speaks for itself, or it doesn’t. By now you’ve read enough of it that you can judge whether I communicate well or not. One thing’s for sure, I’m not scared of word count.

I’m reliable, I’m punctual, I’m flexible, I’m bendable. I’m in reasonable shape, mentally and physically, and I have good transportation. I’m in a great relationship with a wonderful guy (and for those of you not keeping up with the MrVisible Saga, yes that does mean I’m gay.) I’m looking for long-term, stable employment. Despite having had an astonishing number of jobs, I’ve never been fired. I’m willing to relocate if the offer’s good enough. Oh, and I’m pretty much debt-free, and right now I can be had for cheap.

So, whaddaya want?

Given what you’ve read about me, in all its profuse entirety, I want to know what you think I should do now. I’m hoping that you can offer some guidance as to what you think I’m suited for, and what you think would make me happy. I’d love to hear from some Dopers who have been where I am now, looking at the crossroads of infinite possibilities, who could tell me how they figured out which path to choose.

I often think of these boards as the modern-day equivalent of the oracle on the hilltop. I come to the boards when I want knowledge, wisdom, insight, and mockery. And right now, I need them all, in spades.

And so I ask you, O Dopers…

What should I do with my life?

Sounds like of all the things you’ve done, the Ren Fair work was the most… satisfying? Engaging? Relaxing?

Is there some way you could get hooked up with one on a more full-time basis?

Ever considered being hired as a sales consultant (i.e. teach people how to sell better) to places like Circuit City or such?

My friend recently quit her computer support job and went into business for herself as a consultant. She sets up Filemaker databases for people. They want a contract employee who will come in and make stuff work and then go away when the project is over. It’s worked out very well for her, and her start-up costs were very low. It was her brain, and some business cards.

I think this .Net stuff could be promising. That’s what my husband just started doing, learning C#. He has no computer training, either. He’s an architect–all his computer work has been self-taught.

He did apply for one job a few years ago that was truly interesting. It was for a company which designed trade show displays. They needed someone with computer skills, but also wanted someone who could build stuff. It was a dream combination for him. He didn’t get it (alas) but I had never known there could be jobs like that. There’s all kinds of stuff out there, and I think someone as skilled and resourceful as you will land something.

Well. Where do I start? How about with the fact that you are (when you describe yourself) describing the ideal candidate for the same job that I have? A job that is very highly paid and is in desperate need of good people right now? One that needs people who can converse with IT geeks and laymen alike?

Get ye to software sales.

Newton’s third law applies in this economy. The growth of technology made IT folks a commodity, and when something becomes a commodity, it becomes all about whoever can provide the service the cheapest. On the other hand, the growth of technology made it very easy to sell technology products. A gee-whiz powerpoint was often all that was needed to make a sale. Now it is different. The job demands people who are fluent in ITspeak and can also explain the benifit of new software to an administrator who doesn’t know IP from an IV.

Keep in mind that companies are not advertising for these positions - they get a million resumes for every position on monster - so you need to target the companies you are interested in. I guarantee you that you will get your resume read. If this interests you, let me know here, I can help you.

P.S. If you think that sales is all about sleazy, short-sleeves-with-a-tie jerks, don’t. This kind of sales is so far removed from that you will never believe it.

What do you want to do?
If you want to do tech stuff, there are still jobs out there for qualified people (granted, not that, many jobs). If you feel you are missing certain qualifications, go and get them. Leave the puppet show drug stuff off the resume.

That’s about all I got for ya. I have no idea what I want to do, much less what you want to do, and I’ve been thinking about it for 6 months.

If you really want to get back to working with your hands and are not looking to go back into computer stuff, perhaps you could get involved somehow with theatre? Crew, prop man, something? Sorry, I guess I’m not really suggesting a steady job, but the stuff about being a good seller and artistic and communicative jumped out at me.

The Magic Eight Ball says: “All signs point to computer-related sales consultant.”

First off, I want to thank everyone who slogs through that monster post. Wow. Y’all are dedicated.

Originally posted by Eonwe

Not really. Nor would I want to; the Faires are a culture that I did well in a long time ago, but I wouldn’t want to rejoin now. Living like that, from day to day, from hand to mouth, travelling constantly, was great for me then, but these days I’m a homebody with a wonderful boyfriend and dogs and plants and stuff. I still like travelling, I just like to have a place to come home to when I’m done. And the fests demand travel nine months out of the year. And I no longer do drugs; the Faires aren’t called ‘Hippy Petting Zoos’ for nothing.

Originally posted by iampunha

I’d be glad to consider it, but have absolutely no idea how to go about getting started in that direction. Keep in mind, it’s been… hmm… six years since I’ve done any sales at all.

Originally posted by CrankyAsAnOldMan

I’ve actually tried that; I ran my own business for two years. Into the ground. I love doing the work, but I have no business sense. None. And I found I ran myself ragged trying to find clients, negotiating, getting the work, doing the work, fine-tuning the work, keeping the books, trying to figure out ways to market myself… I suck as a small business owner. I barely slept for two years.

Originally posted by Lamar Mundane

Hmm… now that sounds interesting. How did you go about getting into the field?

Originally posted by msmith537

Here in Tucson, the tech jobs just aren’t there, and I don’t have the resources to get the certs to get the jobs. Which can be translated as, ‘I don’t think I want to do tech jobs anymore.’ And my resume, like me, is drug-free these days.

Originally posted by Magickly Delicious

Yeah, I’d love to get back into that. I’ll have to think about it; as a 38-year-old with limited skills in this area, though, it seems like the competition for jobs would be pretty stiff.

Originally posted by Vorae

I want your Magic Eight Ball. Mine just said “Do you want fries with that?”

I feel that at this point I should bring up a particular issue. I’m poor. Always have been, pretty much. Even my top, best economy, state university computer job topped out at 31k, and that was a big step up from the previous 22k a year I’d been making beforehand. It’s an advantage in some ways; my salary requirements look pretty easy to meet. But it’s also hard to go from that to computer-related sales consultant. At least in one leap.

Thanks for the feedback, folks. Keep it coming; I need all the help I can get.

Here’s a good way to get started.

Look at general fields of interest that you have that also fit your background - say education, government, medicine, law, etc. You have some background in government, so lets use that for an example. What you want to do is to find out which companies make software apps for government. You can do this by calling some of your old contacts in the field, or even better, find out what the big government technology conferences are, the huge ones.

Googling “Government Technology Conferences” gets you here, a little digging gets you to a list of exhibitors with links to their homepages. This is where you start. Look at the companies, what their business is, where they are located, etc. Find some that are a good fit for your skills and write to them. I would suspect that without having a lot of sales background on your resume, you can skip the PwC’s and Accentures and IBM’s, but look to smaller niche companies, especially if they are headquartered in your area.

Find out who the sales manager is (just call and ask) and send them a personalized letter along with your resume. Describe your background just as you did above, emphasizing your ability to communicate complex technology to a non-technical audience. Tell them you have experience presenting to a large audience (I’d skip the part about them being dressed in chain mail and chewing on turkey legs) and you are comfortable with that. Explain how you are connected with the industry the company sells to. Drop a few names if you can. What you are trying to do here is to get an interview.

If you do all this, I can almost guarantee you that you will get a call back. Some sales types like to wait for you to call them, so don’t be afraid to call as a follow up. Many software companies have a system of inside/outside sales, where the inside people work on the phone from the office, while the outside person works remotely and makes the calls. Inside sales is a good way to get your feet wet, and should pay significantly better than $30K.

Once you get to the interview, you’re on your own. Just one thing - ask for (and get) the interviewers business card. Just do it.