What the fuck is your problem, Dathan?

The BBQ Pit
1

So I’m watching TV last night & that Passover/Easter holiday classic, The Ten Commandments is on ABC. I’ve seen it a few times when I was younger, but it’s been a while, so I decide to watch the whole movie last night. Still a classic, even with Charlton Heston’s usual over-acting.

But, man, what the fuck is wrong with you, Dathan (played by Edward G. Robinson)? I mean, Moses is the focal point of, like, 300 miracles in that movie, and you still doubt the guy & give him a hard time?!? You little fucking piss-ant!!

Look, the guy was the focal point of TEN plaques against the Egyptians, ranging from swarms of frogs, to swarms of locusts, to KILLING THE FIRST BORN OF EVERY NON-BELIEVER, and still you’re not impressed. When fleeing Egypt, you’re still kissing-ass with the Egyptian guards, claiming that Moses is going to lead the Israelites “into the desert until their eyes are swollen from the heat” & that you’ll be there to lead them back home. Yeah, just fucking great, back-stabber!!

So then, THEN, everyone gets to the Red Sea, and there’s a pillar of filre blocking the Egyptian army from the Israelites (a nice 50’s special effect), and black clouds are forming all about, and THE FUCKING RED SEA PARTS – IT PARTS DICKWAD – and you’re still trying to get everyone to STONE Moses?

Finally, after ALL that, after all that you’ve seen, after all the fucking plaques, miracles, whatever . . . you convince everyone to worship a FUCKING COW when Moses goes away for a long weekend?!? I mean, come-on, what the FUCK does it take to impress you?!? Serves you right when God finally has had enough of your shit and puts an end to your miserable existance!!

2

Y’know, there’s such a thing as holding a grudge too long.

3

When even Pharoah (as played by Yul Brynner) acknowledges that “[Moses’s] god is God,” one has to wonder about Dathan’s perversity in not accepting that Moses is the agent of the The Big G.

4

Oh, if the Egyptians had only invented toothpaste…

5

Dathan’s line, “Moses has words. Pharaoh has spears!” always reminded me a little of Stalin’s, “How many divisions does the Pope have?”

I haven’t seen The Ten Commandments in years, though. I wonder if there are more explicit parallels between Egypt and the Soviet Union in that film…

I really should try watching it again. Do they give a discount if your rent The Ten Commandments after Easter/Passover (like how they mark down the price of chocolate bunnies)?

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I know it’s not saying much, but i think that Robinson’s acting performance was about the best of the whole cast.

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“Where’s your Messiah noooow?”

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Didn’t watch the Ten Commandmants yesterday, but I did watch The Prince of Egypt. Much better biblical movie. I always choke up when the Israelites are finally leaving, and the one old woman hesitates at the city gates, and her granddaughter takes her hand and leads her out… >sniff< Gets me every time… Now I’m all verklempt.

Talk amongst yourselves.

9

Miller, are you talking about the cartoon movie?
We have it but I never watched it all the way through.
But I did get a kick out of the way they made it look like Pharaoh wasn’t really trying to hurt Moses in the begining, but it was just good old sibling rivalry.

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I whole-heartedly agree. Any actor/actress that can get this type of emotional response out of me must be good. He really portrays his part (as an antagonist to Moses & slimy “kiss-ass” of the Egyptians) very well.

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Kricket: Yep, that’s the one. Really an amazing, underrated movie. The parting of the Red Sea gives me goosebumps. And the last plague… It’s hard to portray a kind and loving God that kills a bunch of children, but this picture pulls it off. God, in general, is portrayed as powerful and unfathomable and more than a little terrifying. Sounds about right, to this heathen.

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Wow, Miller, maybe I should pop it in the VCR and watch it all the way through.
Maybe when the heathens are long in bed. I never get to see anything through to the end while they are awake.

13

In one word: Power .

Overnight, Dathan went from governor to wanderer, from local ruler to underling, from priviledged to ordinary. He gained nothing from liberation, he lost everything he had.

He had been a local Big Shot, with authority to decide whether a man would live or die (cf. Joshua). Now he had lost his authority. So it’s no surprise he wanted to bring everybody back to Egypt – as long as he got his old position and power back. (In fact, his brief chat with the soldier suggests he wanted a little extra on the side.)

Fucking politician.