Let’s say that you have a time machine, but rather than use it to go kill Hitler, or buy Microsoft stock in the 80s, you only want to use it to pull pranks. What would you do?
Me? I’d go back in time to the premiere of Gone With the Wind and swap out the reels with Django Unchained, then when it was over and everyone was sitting there is stunned silence, I’d turn to Vivien Leigh and say, “so, what’d you think?”
You?
Swap out the bullets in Aaron Burr’s gun with blanks. Hilarity ensues.
Go back to November 22 1963, shoot JFK and frame some patsy for it.
Carve “e=mc2” into one of the stones of Stonehenge.
Nuremberg Rally. Custard Pie.
Sneak into the Apollo 11 capsule. Swap out the Stars and Stripes for a Union Jack
I’m about to head back to have the Brits lose to George Washington. LOL.
Use the Crank Prank TimePhone to call Alexander Graham Bell.
Swap out J.W. Boothe’s gun with a squirtgun.
Copyright the term “Apple Computers”, just to see what other fruit would be picked instead.
Find out where they buried Jimmy Hoffa, then stick him in Grant’s Tomb.
Go back and fill “Al Capone’s Vault” with nude photos of Geraldo Rivera.
Yeah, go back to the Nuremberg rallies and during one of Hitler’s dramatic pauses, yell “I call bullshit!”
That would make a great practical joke…on you.
Spray the Gordian Knot with liquid kevlar. take that Mr. Alexander Not As Great As You Thought.
Take a portable sound system and various lighting and smoke effects back to the 16th century. Install the speakers and effects out of sight in the Sistine Chapel around the newly-painted “The Last Judgment” by Michaelangelo. Wait until Cardinal Carafa comes in on his own, then crank up the effects while blasting Verdi’s “Die Irae” at top volume. Watch him literally crap himself.
That’ll teach him to pick on Michaelangelo.
Nail all the windows shut at the Texas Book Depository on November 21, 1963.
You know those Lee Harvey Oswald Band t-shirts? (Example.) I’d go back to that moment, and put those instruments in place, removing Ruby’s gun in the nick of time, of course.
Nobody would get the joke except me, but I’d think it was hilarious.
Introduce Western diseases to the Americas a solid 1000 years before Columbus – which would give them enough time for a population rebound – thus providing them with a fighting chance.
Leave a toilet at the geographic South Pole on 12/13/11.
Also, I’d go forward in time to December 31, 2100, and plant holographic projectors in a bunch of scenic places, scheduled to go off at midnight, that would show the image of a dude known as CATS, who would say “How are you gentlemen?” and then go into the rest of his AYB spiel.
Again, nobody would get the joke, which would be completely forgotten by then, but I’d think it was a riot. Maybe I’d build in the sound of an explosion to go off at midnight, with just enough of a pause so that when someone asked what happened, I could say, “Somebody set up us the bomb,” and then add, “We get signal,” just before CATS appears.
This is not exactly what the OP is asking for but it reminded me of this excellent short bit on time travel. Well worth a read. Here is a little bit of it:
Also, an XKCD: Kill Hitler
I know someone who was working there on 12/13/11. I don’t remember him mentioning any shortage of toilets.
Oh wait, you mean 1911. Personally, I’d go for a big banner saying, “Welcome, polar explorers!” though I might change that to “Nyah, nyah, I was here first! - Roald” between the time Amundsen’s party left and when Scott’s party arrived.
ETA: This would work on a bunch of explorers from Christopher Columbus to Edmund Hillary. And Neil Armstrong, if the time machine could move that far in space as well.
Anne Boleyn. Rubber word.
I’d just go with “First!” and then also get credit for starting that whole thing.