I don’t get it. But thanks for trying to explain…
What do you mean by “actually”? 
Say when we reach our point of closest approach, you glance at your clock. It says 12:30. You look at my clock and it says 12:10. However, from my perspective, when my clock says 12:10 you’re still far, far way. We won’t pass each other for another 20 minutes. When we do pass each other, my clock says 12:30, and yours says 12:10.
Note that this is *after *we take into account all the delays involved with photons travelling between us. Time is actually flowing at different rates for us.