Well, now, there may be some exception about which I’ve forgotten or was unaware, but in my years of watching presidential debates, one of the requirements I recall is that the audience remain quiet and not applaud except at the beginning and the end. Trump seems to feed off the mood of his ugly crowds, and because of that, I wonder if he would try to change this customary rule. I have a hard time picturing his schtick playing very well to a silent hall.
In fact, the more I picture it, the more it makes me smile.
I’d like to require that Trump abstain, cold turkey, from his typical daily regimen of cheap amphetamines for at least 48 hours before appearing onstage.
He will be shivering and sweating from the withdrawal horrors and will appear weirdly shrunken in his crappy suit, but he might be able to speak in full sentences of proper English.
Trump did not say he wants “very badly” to debate. What he actually said is textbook Donald horrible phrasing. He actually said“I want to debate very badly”, which is an incredibly likely result, but surely not what he meant to say.
Dates, times and formats have already been announced (they’re decided on by an independent commission). I think the campaigns usually haggle over some of the details, like podium placement and such, but the meaningful decisions are made by the commission.
Moderators are also chosen by the commission, but I can’t google-up who they are this year. Not sure if they haven’t been announced, haven’t been chosen, or my google-fu is just weak. Maybe they just wait till the closer to the debates to spare the moderators months of partisan complaints about how they won’t be fair, are being bribed, etc.
And, obviously, he must be supplied with far better answers prepared for him. Clinton must always be asked the question first, and then The Donald gets to respond with the prepared zinger, emphasized by stabbing the air with his grotesquely foreshortened stubby index finger. The flashing “Applause!” sign must then be illuminated and the audience is required to respond accordingly; anyone failing to be sufficiently enthusiastic is to be ejected from the venue and detained for questioning by The Donald’s personal Geheime Staatspolizei.
• No babies in the audience
• Clinton must not be on her period
• Must only use Trump owned properties as debate venues
• Clinton must rent plane from Trump organisation to fly to debate
• Only Trump brand bottled water to be sold at venue
(yes I know clinton almost certainly doesn’t have periods any more, its a joke)
Trump will want to have a visual advantage. He would like to stand on a giant platform surrounded by American flags.
Trump will insist Hillary sit in a dirty ditch with an Islamic State flag behind her. This is perfectly reasonable because Hillary is the “co-founder of ISIS.”
