What would happen if hardcore porntapes with Obama leaked?

I think it would also matter if he made the film more recently (like while in office) or a long, long time ago…

Was the film made with his knowledge or no?

Was his co-star his wife (or g/f at the time) or was he “roaming” from the homestead?

Was he performing generally mainstream sex acts, or was he swinging from the chandelier???

This thread really needs “need answer fast” in its title

Well, suppose that the tapes showed Obama geared up in gay Nazi uniform leather porn and enjoying a good waterboarding by the SDMB Scientific Advisory Staff and it turned out that Obama’s private parts were, in fact, uncircumcised and black in skin tone? Then, the zombie corpse of Dick Cheney was wheeled-in by Dick Morris, both in similar Nazi leather porn garb, followed by Barbara Bush the Elder, completely in the nude doing some sort of belly dancing, while South Park’s Big Gay Al sang “God Bless America” while having tea made from the bags of abortion doctors who actually blew up their clinics as part of an insurance fraud. What could plausibly happen next? Could you in fact hire the fake actor/writers who appear on 30 Rock to give us a scenario that could be massaged by The Daily Show with Jon Stewart writing staff while they are on hiatus so that it could pass as a believable hard news report on Fox News to their regular audience? You betcha!

Slightly off-topic, but “Barbara Bush” is my safeword.

That’s not safe, that’s overkill.

Zachary Taylor…

:::SHUDDER:::

I agree. It could also be clown porn or furries or a foursome with Bettie White and Wilford Brimley, and that’s all legal-but-deeply-disturbing too.

Until the OP said in post #5 to throw a couple of minors into the mix, I was torn. Obama could probably be forgiven a fair amount of kinky stuff - if he was doing it with Michelle. Tapes of him cheating on her would be political suicide, even without adding statatory rape/child molestation (OP didn’t say how old the minors were) to the heap.

The ARISTOCRATS!