Set up Trust Funds for my parents, brothers & sister, & my niece.
Long term investments that will enable the Di’Chis to regain the considerable wealth we had in the 19th century.
Set up a small business, & hire people to run it for me.
Modest lifestyle, minor local politics, travel (Japan, Ireland & the UK), & lots of Science Fiction Conventions.
[hijack] Kyann22, this is what I did last year. One bit of advice: If you really want to go do it, try to get a graduate assistantship. At the LIS school I started at last August, GAs or GTAs include a tuition waiver - you still have to pay fees and living expenses, but since you also get a stipend from the assistantship, it’s possible. Plus, your undergrad loans can be deferred while you’re in school.
[/hijack ]
If I won the lottery? I’d finish this grad program, pay off all debt and then figure out what kind of librarian I want to be when I grow up. 
And travel. And pay off the debt of my immediate family. Actually, I have a list somewhere in the apartment that we created at one point…hmmm
Here we go:
I’d buy a Nissan Skyline GTR R -34, black, trick the shit out of it.
I’d get a 98 Honda Prelude for when I’m just doing whatever and pimp that car out too.
I’d buy an awesome loft somewhere downtown, get anything I’d want and need to design it to my liking.
I’d buy my dad a really nice classic car, and a really nice regular car. (he deserves it so much 
)
I’d buy my mom a nice car too.
I’d buy my brother any car he wanted and get the craziest soundsystem put in.
I’d either pay off my parents house, or buy them a new one, whatever they want.
I would pay some kid to clean out my grandparents place of all the junk they have. So much filth!
I’d open a custom import shop with my friend alex, or at least help him out with him. Lucky bastard already has $300 000 US for it.
I’d get my friends really cool stuff.
There’s more but I don’t wanna ramble.
Make sure my family is comfortable.
Quit work, hire an architect and design a modest house with a HUGE honkin garage/workshop. House wouldn’t have to be fancy, just well laid out. Did I mention HUGE honkin garage/workshop.
Then I would take classes to learn stuff. I’d get an airplane mechanic’s license, learn to cook on a 3 star level and definitely take some investment courses.
-I’ve always had the feeling that I couldn’t just relax and vegetate. People need to do something productive with their lives in order for it to have meaning. I would certainly write a couple of history books.
It would also be fun to do the Bill Gates thing. Find worthy charities to finance and then track their progress.
I would buy a big sock.
And have some rest.
I would buy a creepy old house. Then I would dig a moat and stock it with creepy sea things.
I would move several ancient gnarled trees onto my property. Then I would install a hedge maze with several wild boars in it.
I would spend the rest of my life ordering pizza, promising the delivery guy large tips if he delivered to the door.
Then, for those of those who made it, I would refuse to pay, claiming my pizza was cold and slam the door on them. Then I would laugh at them and slam the door in their faces.
Practical
Pay bills,
set up family with trust funds
Set up a scholarship fund at my high school alma mater
Set up a fund for my kid’s co-op ( only if they get rid of teacher.)Investments
New House ( complete with weekly maid and gardener service.)
Send kids to the snootiest prep school in the state.
Travel
Impractical:
Lipo and tummy tuck
Doper party
$ to Chicago Reader for new hamsters.
Tickets to concerts for my friends
New car
Trebuchet
Make people that come grubbing for money jump do impossible things to try to get some money.
In general I’d spread the wealth to my family and friends but specifically I’d buy my girlfriend the beach house she’s always wanted. I’d buy myself a big house on several acres. I’d have a big ass pool with slides and stuff. I’d even build a garage next to the pool so that we could jump off the roof…just like when we were kids! A full basketball court (which I probably wouldn’t use) a tennis court and I’d buy like 5-6 go-carts and build a dirt race track for them. Then my friends and I would just race all day. OK, maybe not all day.
Ya know…I may do the go-cart thing someday whether I win or not. How expensive could that really be anyway?
Well, as I have no debt, so that’s no problem there.I’d split it 50/50 with LilTel. then I’d do the following, but not nessisarily in this order.
I’d give each one of my Siblings a hundred thou or so, so’s they’d stay off my tail. They’re a money grubbing bunch. Big endowments to a few friends.
I’d buy a big house for myself and hire a full time live in for chauffer/maid/cook services. Said house would preferably be as far from the MG Sibs as I can reasonably get.
Buy a biggol’ house for the present roommate as I owe him more than anyone knows.
Set up accounts for the two children I didn’t raise.
Prepay for the funerals of My Mom, myself, LilTel and 3 extra places for whom ever came along.
Buy an extra little place in SanFransisco and beg whomever I can for thier season tickets for life to the 49ers.
Give a bit to various orgs including The United Way,Marine Scholorship Fund,a Feline charity of some type, and The Ohio State University.
Travel to Greece, Israel,and Kenya (OK Maybe Australia too)
Follow Fleetwood Mac on thier tours.
Get to the Plastic surgeon and get rid of these skin remnants from extreme weight loss.
oh yes muad! i would just be a professional student the rest of my life! that and travel.
THAT’s what I’M talking about!
(specifically the first one)
Well I would firstly seek the advice of a financial planner. After receiving his/her input as to how spend a bunch then live off the interest I would go to town.
A modest yet comfortable house on a cliff overlooking the ocean, a Rolls Royce with a killer sound system, a Chesterfield couch to sit on and read in front of my open fire (in aforementioned house). Speaking of reading I would definitely spend an eternity in antique bookstores just buying anything that looked half interesting and collate a massive library (I’ve always wanted those high shelves that you need the rolling ladder for).
I’d furnish the said house with old cabinets, tables, chairs etc.
I’d love to buy my entire CD collection on vinyl and listen to all of them on a custom made stereo that is linked to speakers all through the house in EVERY room.
Of course I’d give a sizeable amount to family and subsequent parties would take care of the friends issue.
If I won the lottery …
Give my parents (both sets) enough money so they won’t have to worry about bills and work
Give all 5 of my older and younger brothers and sisters and pretty large sum so they can get a good start on their lives (although I might not give them too much since most are always in trouble with the law due to drugs)
Give both grandmas enough money so they will be able to get the medical treatment they need without having to worry about not making the rent or morgage payment
Pay off mine and my current roommate/ex debts and school loans (since we incurred them together)
Pay the rent for the year and buy new furnature for the place (because my dog just loves to chew on stuff like that and the fact that all pieces are brocken down hand me downs) and buy a new car and give the old one to the ex (since he doens’t have one) then after finishing buying all the stuff move out and give it all to the ex that way he can find out what he truly wants in life since its not with me.
I would then find an apartment to continue to live in while I finish my last year of college. In the mean time find a nice huge acre lot just outside of where I currently live and build a 4 bedroom house with a big fenced in yard (so my Jack Russell Terrier has plenty of running room). I would then buy at least 2 more Jackie’s, at least 2 Great Danes, two West Highland Terriors, and many more dogs and become the lonely crazy dog lady that everyone talks about and fears :). I may even look in to becoming one of those dog rescue/foster parent people.
Invest the rest of the money I have left
May take a mini vacation (but only if I could take my doggie with me) and then sit back, graduate, get my teaching liscense, and become a substitute teacher for a while and then maybe become a full time teacher.
but then again I don’t play the lottery so that will never happen … unless the rich old lady from my dreams finally kicks the bucket and randomly selects me to inherit all her money
“If I had millions of dollars I would go to poor African countries
and wash their babies. I would be a mercenary.”
Huh, whuzzuh? Oh. I mean I would quit my job so I could play Everquest and Star Wars Galaxies all the time.
Another Minnesotan in total agreement with Muad’Dib. Professional student would be cool.
Workshop that has Norm from the New Yankee Workshop say “cool”
Then refurbish old sailboats. Lots of Alden yawls and ketches.
Good stuff:
Pay off bills, get family out of debt and buy them houses. Trust funds for all the kids college educations and give some money to charity.
Travel extensively.
Evil stuff:
Go to Las Vegas to gamble. Also to hire enough prostitutes to make every fantasy my wife and I have come true.
Hire a barbershop quartet in full costume to sing insulting songs to everyone that ever pissed me off.
“Oh you can bite me, bite me, bite me (harmony) biiittte meeeee”
I am in a long-term pissing contest with a couple of co-workers. (Thier fault of course). I work in an education environment. I would offer to donate one hundred thousand dollars to the institution…the day after both individuals are no longer employed. The amount of the gift would shrink by ten thousand dollars each year…and both people would know what the deal is. Soon, they would feel the unspoken pressure and quit or the institution would get greedy and find some way to fire them. Either way, they would get to feel the mental pressure from the first day until the last.
See how many ways I can make people debase themselves for money.
Win the lottery big? Say, CAD 60 million? After not paying taxes on it because I live in Canada, I’d hire some sort of financial planner to get the plans in motion to:
[ul][]Draw.[]Start an art gallery and publishing house for my artwork.[]Pay off my sister’s mortgage, buy them a new minivan, support the stepkids through college, etc.[]Get my retired and frail pesnioner father whatever he wants… daily maid service to the apartment, flatscreen TV, new house (but I have a feeling he might not want to move), limo and medically-trained attendant anywhere he wants to go (to the mall, overseas, whereever), whatever.[]Buy a large condo in that new fifty-storey tower that is planned for Yonge and Eglinton. Arrange for mucho bandwidth to said condo. Fill condo with organic clothing and bedware, professional kitchenware, Scandinavian furniture, Legos, kickass computers and media gear, and at least one John Kuhn sculpture (in a special niche of its own, illuminated by a halogen lamp).[]Donate to many worthy charities and organizations, including (but not limited to) selected non-fanatical religious and environmental organizations, the Canadian Esperanto Association, a number of political parties, local foodbanks and rehabilitation organizations, and art galleries feathuring the work of artists outside the clique.[]Fund organizations devoted to combating bullying. []Travel. []Hire a personal trainer for long enough to do some good (I couldn’t quite afford to do this in real life). Find out whether it is possible for a forty-year-old to start learning gymnastics.[]Learn French, Spanish, and Mandarin, although maybe not at the same time.[]Take dance lessons. I need all the help I can get.[]Take social skills lessons. I need all the help I can get.[]Donate the cost of a course of counseling to certain very good counselors I know, so that someone who can’t afford it can get the benefit.[]And, last but definitely not least, teach computer art to gifted kids. Give them what they need without any of this annoying regimentation and age-stratification. If they can take it, they’ll get it. (With parental involvement, of course). [/ul]
I’d pay off my parents’ house, buy my brother his dream car (probably a Ferarri Testarossa) and a special garage to keep it in (his last two cars were both stolen).
THEN, I 'd travel the world for at least a year.
Oh, I forgot:[ul][*]Buy giant nuclear-powered hamsters for the Reader’s servers so that the SDMB roars… [/ul]