I’d put the ant in the garden and eat the cake. If I had a spouse, I’d offer half, but I don’t think I’d warn him about the ant, because I don’t think it’s an issue.
An ant would not stop me from eating delicious cake.
Flashback to a camping trip when I was a small child. Mom had made a colorful cake with stripes of pink and yellow. You know what likes bright colors? BEES. So I have this plate of delicious cake and it’s swarming with bees, and I already know not to swat at bees, but they’re all over this slice of cake and I’m trying to figure out how to eat it and not irritate the bees, and dad starts yelling, “Eat the cake! You’d better eat that cake!”
sob
Then I’d dump the cake. Not rational, I know, but the little brown ants give me the willies. They seem more devious, somehow, and they swarm.
Plus, they’d camouflage way to well the the coffee cake crumble topping.
I figured he’d be all over that cake til he ate himself to death. Evidently it wasn’t his favorite because I didn’t have to pick him off.
Kill the SPOUSE, eat the cake. ::cackles::
I’d humanely release the ant (at the same time, weeping with the knowledge that it would be unlikely to find its way back to the nest, unless released in exactly the right place), then either eat the cake, or give it to the spouse (mentioning the ant).
Ants aren’t dirty, as far as I’m concerned. If it was a bluebottle fly, I’d throw out the cake.
About 6 months ago, I opened a Pop-Tart and a maggot fell out. I threw it away, but opened another package and ate it. But since then, I haven’t been able to eat Pop-Tarts at all.
An ant wouldn’t bother me, though. I’d eat it. The coffee cake, not the ant.
Eat cake, kill ant. Spouse only gets cake if he’s here to claim it. If he’d asked me to bring him cake, and *that *was when I’d found the ant … I guess I’d put the cake on a clean plate and give it to him. I might think to tell him about the ant, but I don’t think it would bother him.
eta: gosh, Gala Matrix Fire, that sounds like some serious trauma. I’m not sure if I’d be frightened of bees or cake afterwards.
I have had roasted ants that came in a can from some exotic place in the world. They were strong tasting and not especially good but it wasn’t disgusting either. That was in middle school for a social studies class. Most kids were disgusted at the thought but, after a few of us broke the ice, almost everyone ate some with no psychological or physical effects. It wouldn’t bother me. Grasshoppers fried in butter are yummy. I swallowed a grub worm whole once. It wasn’t enjoyable but not that bad either. I know what earthworms taste like too because of fishing but I never ate a whole one. They are very earthy and not that bad.
Are you sure ants can’t find their way home? How did he find the cake in the first place? If he has a sense of smell, maybe he can smell his way home…thanks alot, now I have something else to feel guilty about.
Ants can find their way home if they are put back on or near a scent trail leading to their nest, otherwise, not. If the ant got into the box on the picnic table in the garden and you release it by dropping it elsewhere (say, out of any old window), it will probably not make it back to the nest.
I dont like coffee cake but I dont think ants are as gross as roaches. I would look at it real close to make sure there arent more ants and then eat it. No biggy.
One time I ate some serial and it was a honey bunches of oats kind of cereal only it was store brand, but anyway it had little flecks of all kinds floating in it so I didnt notice until I had eaten most of it that it was full of ants. I didn’t finish it but it didn’t make me sick or anything.
EAT the spouse, kill the cake. I’m out of ant options.
The cake is a lie.
Take the cake across the river first. Come back alone. Take the ant the second time and on the ride back, bring the cake. Take the spouse with you on the third trip and leave her with the ant. Return alone. On the fourth trip across, bring the cake.
Heavens to Betsy! Ya’ll would throw out a perfectly good <read FUCKIN GOOD> coffee cake because of a single ant? Germaphobes. pffft.
We had an invasion of those itty bitty ants this spring. We set out Terra on the counter and gleefully watched their death march. Within a week the line of ants had dwindled to none.
If the cake is good, then eat it.
There’s no such thing as good coffee cake.
Can I kill the person who made the cake, squish the ant and get “eaten” by the spouse?
Also - fried carrot cake … mmmmmmmmmmm
Well, if people can eat chocolate covered ants; I think I can handle one in my coffee cake.
That link made me snicker by the way… 
Does that make you a serial eater?