Bigus Dickus
Since Pope John Paul has been recently taken, I think someone needs to be Pope George Ringo just to balance things out.
Julian was the last pagan emperor of Rome. I don’t think it’d go over well.
Bobot The Great
or, if I was allowed, just: Bobot
I’d be a cool pope.
Trust me.
Considering some of the allegations against His soon-to-be-ex-Holiness (too pooped to pope, apparently), naming yourself “Innocent” would be asking for trouble.
I bet you already know this: 30+ years ago, National Lampoon ran the following faux headline: John Paul elected Pope; George Ringo miffed
Petra I. Not quite Peter, but I am a woman.
Ahnarhope The First.
Urban, of course.
LOL.
Bob
Gregory XIV. Do you have to change your name when you become pope? Peter didn’t, right? Well, I guess he changed it from Simon, but that was long before becoming pope. If I can’t keep Gregory, I’m going with Balthazar.
You are aware that Copernicus was a priest, right? And that Galileo was a close friend of the Pope (which is why he got to die of old age)?
Pope a Dope
That would become “Cyril” when conventionally rendered into English. Has been used by Popes of the Coptic Church.
Sixtus the Sixth would be fun to make anchorpeople stumble when reporting. Plus it’s just one six short of freaking out a lot of American fundies.
Maybe go Old Testament on the flock and pick Pope Ezekiel or Pope Isaiah and tell them really big s#!t is coming down if they don’t get their act together.
Maybe seek a yet-unused one. Lando (913-914AD) was the last nonrepeating Pope, and was the last “new” name until John Paul I chose to do a compound name. I like the idea of seconding some long-ignored one-shot Papal name as a way to correct the neglect, but at the same time I’d feel odd taking away his uniqueness (“Hey, he is THE Pope Conon”).
Many “big” names in the Canon remain unused - no Peter, we can understand, but if I’m counting right there’s also: No Joseph, Anthony, Dominic, Ignatius or Bernard; no Louis or Didacus(Diego). There are 23 Johns, 6 Pauls, a Mark and a Stephen, but not one Matthew or Luke, no James, Philip, Andrew, or Bartholomew.
Pope Peter the Pist
Valentine II.
Pope Numerus Bestia.
shakes fist
Fine. I shall be Pope Maxwell I.
Pope Esther
“John-Boy”
Pope Cuftbert I
Onarope