Whatever Happened to Donald Rumsfeld?

Time was, you couldn’t turn on the TV on Sunday morning without seeing ol’ Don’s fatherly visage, reassuring us that all was well and in control over at the five-sided clubhouse.

But after the Abu Ghraib mess, he just sort of…evaporated. Did he cut a deal with Bush to stay clear of the press in exchange for keeping his job? Is this part of a coordinated effort by the administration to remove from public view anything that might jog the public’s memory of Abu Ghraib? Or is he just hunkered down in the undisclosed location formerly occupied by Cheney, who’s now growling along the campaign trail?


  • He’s busy planning the next invasion of a country that may be a threat to the US sometime in the future.

  • He’s busy collecting Abu Graib photos for his soon to be announced porn website.

  • He’s pondering the positive attributes of hypocrisy.

  • He’s taking a review course in Geneva convention rules and regulations.

“We don’t need no stinkin’ Geneva Convention!” (Donald Rumsfeld, in a private briefing)