The similarities are all there: the positions/partners you desire are mobbed by other applicants while the readily available ones all have red flags a-waving; your getting dropped for a hot airhead is the same as being replaced with someone younger willing to work for less; being stood-up is the equivalent to arriving at an interview appointment only to be told (after waiting in the reception area for half an hour) that the positon has already been filled. And while the online process is touted as the wave of the future, what really works is networking and getting in their faces.
On the other had, a friend told me of her delight to see an e-mail in her dating profile in-box, which turned out to be a suggestion that she hold a purse in her profile pic because she looks like a man. In the job market, you usually aren’t treated as badly as that; at least until you’re hired and the hazing begins.
Then again, nobody ever had his car reposessed because he hadn’t had a date in several months.
So when is your soul more dire? A Saturday night with just the TV remote, or the next morning with the help-wanted ads?
And a side question; while there’s the stereotypical high-IQ though social outlying people who easily get jobs but not dates, is there the equivalent of the dated-up hottie who can’t get (by which I don’t mean “can’t hold”) a job?
Studies do show that good-looking people get hired more readily, so I’m going to say there’s no such equivalent, in general. As to what’s crueler, dating for sure.
I recently was going through both- dating and job-seeking, and I have to say that when you do that, you better be stroking your own ego regularly or you can really suffer from the toll it takes on your self-esteem. Or, even better, just do one at a time!
Job hunting. At least with dating your end result is you might get laid and find someone you actually enjoy hanging out with. A best with a job hunt, I’ll end up with some fucking job I’ll probably hate but can’t just break up with.
Also, I’m a man so I don’t suffer from that “why can’t I find someone” angst that women seem to feel.
I think job hunting is far worse.
If you have money and security, you can find ways to make yourself happy that don’t involve the opposite sex. It’s tough to have much of a dating life, much less many other fun things in life, if you are worried about your financial future.
But not always. Often they fully intend to fill the position internally, and only want to gauge them against the open market, like when you see a person out on a date who keeps scaning the room for members of the opposite sex.
Which reminds me, I’ve been to roughly the same amount of job interviews where the interviewer did’t put his or her calls on hold to dates where she didn’t turn her cell phone off. “Now, where were we?”
I had a crappy experience on a job interview last week, so I’m going with job hunting. After my next date (if I ever have one) I might feel differently.
At least I already have a job, so my crappy experience isn’t the end of the world. I guess the dating equivalent would be if you’re already in a relationship but you’re scoping out the market to see if there’s anyone better out there.
You can live without a date, you can’t live without a job.
While studies do show that good-looking people get hired more easily, a huge fact overlooked is that in those studies all things are basically otherwise equal. In otherwords, you have two candidates both able to do the job, they’ll hire the good-looking one. Overlooked is the fact if you have one ugly woman who’s qualified and one good-looking one NOT qualified companies usually go with the qualified one.
Dating on line is not cruel because let’s face it, you don’t even know the person behind the computer isn’t a 12 year old boy or a 75 year old woman playing games.
Lack of response to my job applications would faze me. Lack of dates would not at all. Having a job is a necessity for me to survive; not having one and not being successful in my job hunt would drive me absolutely insane.
If you manage a date or two, there’s always the possibility of getting laid if you play your cards right.
There is no such equivalent during a job hunt. You may get an interview or two, but unless those lead to steady employment, there is no middle ground where you can say “At least I got laid.”
Granted, this comes from someone who’s underemployed & got NO interviews this summer (The school budgets passed, but everyone’s hesitant to retire, I suppose.).
ETA: I know I shouldn’t be bitching - I’ve been steadily employed ever since I joined the working world. I just need more money (don’t we all).
If a job interview makes me feel like “This is where I want to work” odds are that I will end up working there. That’s how my job interviews have gone in the past. However, if I’m on a first date thinking, “I could see this turn into a lasting relationship,” it usually ends at two or three dates and I’m left feeling rejected, so I say dating is crueler.
I don’t know about that. When I got fired from my first job I went to the library and pretended to work for a few days. I didn’t have the guts to tell my father I had been fired. I do some strange things when I’m under stress.
I have spent most of my life NOT dating, and I have adjusted. Being out of work… well, you just can’t get used to that. You have to work to enjoy the finer things in life. Y’know… like eating. And electricity.
Dating. I managed to snag my dream job at age 21. Now I’m 24 and still haven’t found the love of my life…or any, for that matter. I would trade the two around in a heartbeat if I could.