What's the cheapest way to legally get rid of one's cadaver?

I don’t believe in wasting money after my inevitable demise, so I’m pondering of ways to legally get rid of my cadaver when the day comes. Right now, the most logical way seems to be to donate it to the medical school for their autopsy practice, but I don’t want to burden them on how to get rid of it after they’re done with it. Any other thoughts?


Ever thought of checking the prices of different crematoriums?
Then tell your loved ones to hold your memorial service at your favorite bar and scatter the ashes in some place significant.
Don’t tell them you’re avoiding the expenses of a funeral home/house of worship and the cemetary. And you’re not picking up the bar tab.

Good question. Ever seen Fargo? Got a wood chipper? I’m sure you’d make great fertilizer. :wink:

“I would far rather be ignorant than wise in the foreboding of evil.”

-Æschylus. 525-456 B. C.

Uh…keep a cage of half-starved wolves in the backyard? Wolverines?

My Dad went smoke (literally) for $5K in 1991; subsequentelly (sp?) one of our friends’ spouse died and she got him roasted for $400. There are ways to handle cremation and disbursement of the remains.

Go ahead and donate. I’ve looked into this. Stanford Medical Center in my area. If they use it, they’ll creamate it after they’re done and give the ashes to whomever you designate. Good use of old meat in my humble opinion. :slight_smile:

Work like you don’t need the money…
Love like you’ve never been hurt…
Dance like nobody’s watching! …(Paraphrased)

If you live near the sea, you can have someone charter a boat, carry your remains out into international waters (I think the current statute is “11 miles out”), and simply dump you into the ocean. Not very poetic, but it gets the job done.

Whole body burials at sea are rare, expensive and highly regulated. From the Sun-Sentinel.com

State and federal regulations demand the casket be of noncorrosive metal and secured with steel bands top, bottom andlengthwise. At least six two-inch holes must be drilled on the coffin’s lid and base. It can be sunk no closer than six miles to shore ininternational waters and in at least 600 feet. Given the casket’s weight, typically only crane-equipped vessels are used for sea burials. Notice must be given or permits obtained from the local medical examinerand county health department. The burial also must be reported to the Environmental Protection Agency’s regional office. EPA’s Atlanta office reports an average of 12 full body sea burials a year in the region that encompasses eight southeastern coastal states. The majority are in Florida.


“Believe those who seek the truth.
Doubt those who find it.” --Andre Gide

Donate it to Spielberg for use as a prop?

How can the EPA set rules for burials in INTERNATIONAL WATERS?

Eat it.

Yer pal,

Just have someone hid all your I.D. and dump your body by the side of the road. Eventually the road kill people will have to pick you up.

We live in an age that reads to much to be wise, and thinks too much to be beautiful–Oscar Wilde

Donate your body to the Anatomical Gift Society. My mom did it about a year and a half ago. The body goes toward medical training at a university in the state you reside in. They cremate your remains and mail them back to your loved ones. I went to a pottery shop and found a lovely covered jar to put mom in, and we buried her in the family plot. I think the whole thing (headstone and all) came to around $1,200. You have to pay a mortician to receive the body from the hospital, then the body dudes pick up the remains from there. It can take up to two years to get the remains back, but we got mom back in about 6 months. It’s ridiculous how much those sunzovbitches get for a dead body, especially one that isn’t being prepared for the dog-and-pony show. Anyway, we all feel real good about the fact that Mom was doing good deeds even AFTER she died. It’s the only way to go. However, when my turn comes, I’m going to have my husband bury the ashes in the yard and plant a tree on top of me. That way, it will truly be a cut-rate deal.

Let the state handle it costs nothing.
Also what country are you talking about?

My dad, as they say, wanted his body donated to science. Home was in Houston, but he died on the East Coast. Some of the hospitals there wanted to charge $1000 for embalming; the med schools here in Texas wanted his body within 24 hours of death, needed him to sign a form (yes, they said that after the situation was explained, go figure), etc, etc…

I finally called the University of Texas Medical Branch in Galveston they asked if he was obese, warned me that the shipping would cost a lot and then asked if we could handle the $200 cost of getting him back home.

I can understand why burials at sea, even in international waters, would be heavily regulated. There were about 10,000 people killed when a hurricane hit Galveston island in 1900. They disposed of the bodies at sea, then cremated them when they washed back ashore.

Spontaneous Combustion.

Dopeler effect:
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Lets see, you can burn him, dump him, or bury him.

Burn him, we put him in the fire, crakle crakle crakle, which is quite a suprise if he’s not quite dead. Then we give you a box of ashes you can call your own.

Dump him, we throw his body into the Thames at night.

Bury him, we dig a hole, throw the body in, where it is eaten by all sorts of little bugs, nibble nibble nibble, which, as I said before,is quite a suprise if he’s not dead.

Hmm, he looks young…hey Charlie, I think we’ve got an eater…


I can think of no more stirring symbol of man’s humanity to man than a fire engine - Kurt Vonnegut

psst. tlie. c’mere. don worry about it. when the time comes, give me a ring. I know a guy who knows a guy. won’t cost you nuttin. and don worry bout gettin found, neither.

I watched one of those Bill Kurtis specials on A&E a few weeks ago about death rituals. It seems that mummification is becoming chic in the US and hardly anyone is trained to do it, and the methods themselves are still being perfected. I don’t know any names, but they say that you can get it done for free if you’re willing to let them practice on you.

The lady I saw them working on evidently had no close family, because if memory serves, the guy signing the papers to have it done was someone with the state. It didn’t look that bad, but if I’m not mistaken, they had her body immersed in some kind of solution inside a metal tank for a couple of weeks. Maybe if someone else saw the same program they could give you better information - I wasn’t watching very attentively.

I wonder what BurnMeUp thinks about this…